Endless Tears

I often tried to kill myself
But never because of happiness.
It started when I was 6 years old
And now it has least for 10 years long.

I often tried to kill myself
But I always failed.
There was always someone
Who stopped me and pulled me back down.

I often tried to kill myself
In every way I can think of.
Some ways
You won't even be able to think about.

I often tried to kill myself
But this was like the first time again.
The razor blade cut through my wrists
But this time because of happiness.

I never killed myself for something like that
I just finally found my angel.
Now I'm afraid to fall back
Back in that darkness I just came from.

I've always wanted to die
Never found any luck.
But now Once I finally have it
It scares me back.

This endless fight
This endless fear.
I will kill myself
I just don't know what year.

But when the day breaks
Please don't cry Please no tears.
Just know
I will wait for you when ever your time may come.
Just know
Even though I love you so