Sugar - Entry 1
Mae, Sugar's mother believed in keeping diaries, for she herself had always kept one. Mae encouraged Sugar to write in it daily. "It’s the only way to chart your progress, to see how you have lived your life,"
The black limousine disappeared into the night among the cheering fans. Their excitement and chats followed her for several miles until she didn’t hear the screams any longer. Laying her head on the cool leather seat, finally she could relax. Her night of pretense was over, and the singing diva was at rest. She was no longer Sugar, one of the famous names in the world. No longer did she have to wear the mask, not again until daybreak.
All her life Sugar had worked and lived for her career. Since the time she could walk, she worked hard to be famous. It was what her mother told her she wanted, and she didn’t stop until the name Sugar was sweetly dripping from everyone’s lips.
In her mother’s quest for fame and fortune, she didn’t realize her life would never belong to her. Sugar the product, Sugar the name belonged to the world. The only refuge she found was in her diaries. Mae, her mother believed in keeping diaries, for she herself had always kept one. Mae encouraged Sugar to write in it daily. "It’s the only way to chart your progress, to see how you have lived your life," Mae would always say.
Cynically, she thought when she died she’d have the diaries placed in a time vault for the future. Maybe then she’d be ready to tell her story to the world, let the whole world learn the true story. Not the lies and fairy tales, she and her mother created.
She pulled out one of the worn diaries, tonight she’d read one of Mae’s. This was her legacy from her mother, the only pieces to a life lived long before her.
Turning on the overhead light in the luxurious limousine, she pulled out the small blue book. Methodically, she unfastened the charmed bracelet she wore pretty much of all of the time from her wrist. It held several keys, keys to the diaries. Finding the one she was looking for, she placed the key in the metal hole and unlocked the past.
June 15, 1968 Birmingham, AL
I held the note with all my heart and soul before ending my song. I was pleased with myself. I felt I had truly done the religious hymn justice. Releasing the microphone stand, I closed my eyes and waited for the applause. Minutes passed and then there it was, quiet and gentle claps spilling out from a very polite congregation. At that moment, I longed for the other church congregation, which was located across town. If I had sang the song there, I would have gotten plenty of shouts, and loads of amen’s.
Disappointed, I smiled graciously to the protestant congregation, and carefully sat down in my heavily starched pink cotton dress.
"Let us give praise to my lovely daughter Maelene for her wonderful selection," I heard my father say. "God has truly shined on her by giving her the gift of song. Praise him!
I rolled my eyes to the ceiling. Why was her father always thanking God for her gift? He didn’t have anything to do with it. Personally, I thanked my great grandmother for the inheritance of this lovely voice. Great grandmother Susan was an almost famous singer with the USO. Many times, I would recall the exciting tales of great grandmother Susan entertaining troops from all over the world. However, there was a little resentment of her for not having the guts to aim for the top. Instead, she let a coal miner sweet talk her into giving up show business, and moving down south to be his wife. I promise myself I’d never be that stupid, I’d never give into a man’s promise in lieu of my dreams.
Church was rather long today. Arthur Lee, my father the minister went on and on about living a righteous life. To tell you the truth I didn’t want to hear it, I had other things on my mind. I was restless and wished him to hush up. I was relieved when he bestowed his final blessing, and sent his flock forward to spread his word.
Please be assured, dear diary, I’m not a heathen, or a sinner. I’m just Maelene Barnes a person with big dreams of the city, and stars in my eyes for the champagne lifestyle.
Growing up in the sixties has been a mixed bag of good and perilous times. But I guess every generation can attest to that. Every since I could remember there has always been a battle to fight, either through wars or protests. However, in my mind there was one thing that transcended all barriers. It allows all of us for at least a minute to lay down our blood stained banners. To put aside the hate and have a love for a universal sound called music. I have craved to be a part of that world. I have an angelical voice and a face beautiful as sunshine.
Right now though, I’m fighting my own battle, the battle of prejudice. Arthur Lee has forbidden me to listen or sing any songs, except the Lord’s. But I do it anyway. I’ve been asked to join a band with people made up of the color of rainbows. They are leaving to tour around to places were the tension is not so bad. I’ve made up my mind to go and test my wings. The band thinks we’ll get a record deal once we hit the road.
Today, dear diary I felt the magic dust on my feet. The tingling sensation nudged me in the direction of my dream. While I’ve already realized the road on the way up will not be filled with grandeur. I have enough confidence in my heart that once I make it, easy street will find me.
© Copyright 2004 ZE Harris, author
All her life Sugar had worked and lived for her career. Since the time she could walk, she worked hard to be famous. It was what her mother told her she wanted, and she didn’t stop until the name Sugar was sweetly dripping from everyone’s lips.
In her mother’s quest for fame and fortune, she didn’t realize her life would never belong to her. Sugar the product, Sugar the name belonged to the world. The only refuge she found was in her diaries. Mae, her mother believed in keeping diaries, for she herself had always kept one. Mae encouraged Sugar to write in it daily. "It’s the only way to chart your progress, to see how you have lived your life," Mae would always say.
Cynically, she thought when she died she’d have the diaries placed in a time vault for the future. Maybe then she’d be ready to tell her story to the world, let the whole world learn the true story. Not the lies and fairy tales, she and her mother created.
She pulled out one of the worn diaries, tonight she’d read one of Mae’s. This was her legacy from her mother, the only pieces to a life lived long before her.
Turning on the overhead light in the luxurious limousine, she pulled out the small blue book. Methodically, she unfastened the charmed bracelet she wore pretty much of all of the time from her wrist. It held several keys, keys to the diaries. Finding the one she was looking for, she placed the key in the metal hole and unlocked the past.
June 15, 1968 Birmingham, AL
I held the note with all my heart and soul before ending my song. I was pleased with myself. I felt I had truly done the religious hymn justice. Releasing the microphone stand, I closed my eyes and waited for the applause. Minutes passed and then there it was, quiet and gentle claps spilling out from a very polite congregation. At that moment, I longed for the other church congregation, which was located across town. If I had sang the song there, I would have gotten plenty of shouts, and loads of amen’s.
Disappointed, I smiled graciously to the protestant congregation, and carefully sat down in my heavily starched pink cotton dress.
"Let us give praise to my lovely daughter Maelene for her wonderful selection," I heard my father say. "God has truly shined on her by giving her the gift of song. Praise him!
I rolled my eyes to the ceiling. Why was her father always thanking God for her gift? He didn’t have anything to do with it. Personally, I thanked my great grandmother for the inheritance of this lovely voice. Great grandmother Susan was an almost famous singer with the USO. Many times, I would recall the exciting tales of great grandmother Susan entertaining troops from all over the world. However, there was a little resentment of her for not having the guts to aim for the top. Instead, she let a coal miner sweet talk her into giving up show business, and moving down south to be his wife. I promise myself I’d never be that stupid, I’d never give into a man’s promise in lieu of my dreams.
Church was rather long today. Arthur Lee, my father the minister went on and on about living a righteous life. To tell you the truth I didn’t want to hear it, I had other things on my mind. I was restless and wished him to hush up. I was relieved when he bestowed his final blessing, and sent his flock forward to spread his word.
Please be assured, dear diary, I’m not a heathen, or a sinner. I’m just Maelene Barnes a person with big dreams of the city, and stars in my eyes for the champagne lifestyle.
Growing up in the sixties has been a mixed bag of good and perilous times. But I guess every generation can attest to that. Every since I could remember there has always been a battle to fight, either through wars or protests. However, in my mind there was one thing that transcended all barriers. It allows all of us for at least a minute to lay down our blood stained banners. To put aside the hate and have a love for a universal sound called music. I have craved to be a part of that world. I have an angelical voice and a face beautiful as sunshine.
Right now though, I’m fighting my own battle, the battle of prejudice. Arthur Lee has forbidden me to listen or sing any songs, except the Lord’s. But I do it anyway. I’ve been asked to join a band with people made up of the color of rainbows. They are leaving to tour around to places were the tension is not so bad. I’ve made up my mind to go and test my wings. The band thinks we’ll get a record deal once we hit the road.
Today, dear diary I felt the magic dust on my feet. The tingling sensation nudged me in the direction of my dream. While I’ve already realized the road on the way up will not be filled with grandeur. I have enough confidence in my heart that once I make it, easy street will find me.
© Copyright 2004 ZE Harris, author
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