General: Sterno's Talkin' Smack -- Episode #14

Sterno's Talkin' smack. No holding back here. It's all trash, all the time. Welcome to the Tuesday morning edition.

Today's column is dedicated solely to All-Star snubbing. Many players found All-Star spots they didn't deserve as others were wrongfully left off the rosters. The joke that is All-Star voting struck again earlier this week. Enough chit chat-let's get started.

Smack This: American League Roster -- It is almost impossible for the combination of the fans, whom for the most part are only knowledgeable about their own teams, and the players/managers who are way too opinionated, to have a completely fair roster in either league. However, what in the heck was the American League thinking?

First, you have the starters. Troy Glaus at third base? Are you kidding me? I am well aware of how well hey did in last years playoffs and what a key cog he was to the Angels run at the title, but why are the fans making him their choice at the hot corner? The reason is that the guy who really deserves it, well, they never heard of him!

Hank Blaylock has been hitting at a torrid pace for most of the first half for the Texas Rangers. Right now he sits in the .330 range and has added pop as well as consistency at the plate, to Texas. Blaylock has more runs batted in than Glaus, a much higher avg., and has overall just been a whole lot better to this point. It is a classic case of the fans being dumb, and hearing Troy Glaus' name, and filling in his circle on the ballot.

Next you have Hideki Matsui. Granted, Matsui has had an incredible first half, with over sixty runs batted in and a .300 plus batting average. None the less, he is in no way the right guy for the starting centerfield slot. Pardon me for saying this, but does anyone actually pay attention to stats or what? These fans neglected to see that Vernon Wells of the Blue Jays has eighty runs batted in. Yes, 80 of them! Give me a break. What do you expect when you allow some twelve year old with a hot dog in one hand and a ballot in the other, decide the fate of a game that now "Counts"?

As far as the American League's reserves go, what in the world is Ramon Hernandez doing in there instead of Jason Varitek? Varitek has been a key ingredient in the Red Sox success so far this year. First of all he calls a better game and fields his position better than Hernandez (as if defense matters in baseball anymore). Second, his numbers are better offensively. What, there were too many Red Sox in the game? Have you looked at how many Braves we have here?

Onto the pitching for the AL. The starter is this year's game is deservedly Jamie Moyer. Moyer has been consistent year in and year out and always seems to be a forgotten man in the All-Star gig. His eleven wins this year, on the best team in the Major Leagues, are more than enough to get him the nod. As far as the other pitchers, we have some issues!

Why is "Every Day" Eddie Guardado in the All-Star Game in place of Mr. Automatic, Mariano Rivera? Rivera is still in my opinion the best closer in the game when he is healthy and he has done more than enough since his return from the DL to warrant the opportunity.

In addition, how is Shigetoshi Hasegawa picked to make the team over starting pitchers the likes of Gil Meche and Mike Mussina. Meche, whom the Mariners, would be lost without, has been spectacular. Mussina was bar none the best AL starter through nearly two months of the season. I thought the managers were supposed to actually try and win this game.

American League All-Star Team -- Smacked!!!

Smack This: National League Roster -- The National League's situation is even worse for this year's All-Star classic. As always the fans in the NL parks had no clue as to what they were voting for, but they got lucky and didn't screw up too terribly. The problem in the NL was it had Dust Baker asking his annoying son for advice. Maybe J.T. Snow should have stepped in here as well!

The lineup is stacked with talent and kudos to the fans for understanding that Sammy Sosa, who didn't even make the team at all, should not be starting in the outfield so he can hit at the home run derby with his corked bat. Well done. Albert Pujols is exactly where he should be, in the starting lineup for the NL.

The reserves for the National League are nip and tuck. You could easily make an argument why Mike Leiberthal should be the back up catcher rather than Paul Lo Duca. After all, Lo Duca has only thirty runs batted in despite his .300 batting average. Never the less, Lo Duca has been snubbed before, has been the only solid hitter in the worst lineup in the NL, and back up catcher won't exactly make or break the roster.

In the field, I wasn't too fond of the choice at shortstop for the reserves in Rafael Furcal. We have seen enough of the Braves to know that Furcal can run with the best of them, throw bullets at short, and that he is overall a good hitter. What we haven't seen enough of, are the Expos. Let's face it -- nobody has. Les Expos have nobody going to the park, and no exposure, but if you had seen them, you would know that Orlando Cabrera is a better player than Furcal. Same tools as Furcal, but he has more power potential at the plate.

Oh, and how does Jim Thome not make the All-Star team. All this guy ahs done is step into a Phillies lineup that has lacked anything from Pat Burrell or Jimmy Rollins, and been very, very effective. Home runs, key base hits, and pretty much anything he has been asked to do. Just because the Milwaukee Brewers are so bad that Richie Sexon has to be their representative, he gets screwed.

Now, to the main event! Dontrelle Willis. I repeat. Dontrelle Willis. Major League Baseball amongst other things, are the single worst organization on god's green earth when it comes to marketing and promotions. I want that job. Please, Bud Selig, allow me to help you.

About the only exciting thing about the first half of the year for the baseball fan has been Willis. He is exciting, he has flare, he is a stud on the mound. A streak of seven straight victories as a rookie and a record of eight and one and still, he watches the All-Star game on July 15th from home? Why, Dusty? An earned run average of 2.13 and he will be in his living room when that first pitch is thrown. He should be on the mound you buffoon!

Could it be because your own starter Kerry Wood needed a spot? Could it be because you have a good relationship with your ex-player Russ Ortiz? Could it be because you are certifiably insane? Nobody really knows.

All I know is that Armando Benitez, he of the choking and walking, will be there. Armando Benitez, he of the posing and watching, will be there. Armando Benitez, he of the lowly Mets, will be there. Why, Dusty? Seriously, I don't care what he needed to do. Baker had two extra spots due to having no DH, and he could have done something to get Willis in this game. Heck, I think the guy has as good a case as any to start!

Move Burnitz in as the Met, and get Benitez out. Call Russ Ortiz and tell him your sorry. Tell Kerry Wood to fake a headache. I don't care, I just want to see Dontrelle Willis all fired up as he pitches to A-Rod for the first time.

Thank you Dusty Baker for stealing what would have been a great moment from the fans, and from the game. You are a complete idiot.

The National League All-Star Team --Smacked!!!

One for the Road: I was glad to see that Kobe Bryant is finally wrapped in turmoil. I don't know about you but between his different languages, his Namath jersey's and his overall cocky attitude, I was looking for a scandal. Thank you Vail, Colorado.

Hit me up with feedback at eSports (click the Write the Editor link) or on my homepage at http://www.suite101.com/myhome.cfm/theycallmethecloser.

I'll see you all Wednesday morning... till then, DON'T be the one who's smacked!