Poker: Kevin Walker has taught you well, Grasshopper

Cue the dramatic orchestral music now, please.

As if you didn't notice from the nine million annoying ads they've placed everywhere (okay, so it was cool the first dozen times to see how many poker pros I could identify, but now we're pushing it), next week is the 2004 World Poker Tour Championship. There's only one thing left to do: see who gets the coveted last seat at the biggest event of the year.

And the only thing you have to do to get it is win the Reno Hilton World Poker Challenge. Yeah, I'm sure it's a cakewalk.

Here's how the final table started:

1. Paul Clark - $829,000 2. Michael Kinney - $739,000 3. Harry Knopp - $708,000 4. Tony Bloom - $533,000 5. Pete Muller - $430,000 6. Young Phan - $183,000

The situation at hand does mean I'm giving out the second-to-last Kevin Walker Award of the 2004 WPT season, and it is my pleasure to give it to Idaho native Michael Kinney, a true lover of poker who entered in second place. I just had a sense about this guy (I also swear he looks like somebody I know, but of course can't remember who), and I respected a lot of his early play.

I didn't think he'd go on to win this thing!

But of course, in the tradition of fate and poker loving to come together in a completely backward way, that's exactly what Michael Kinney did, outlasting a poker pro, a tour veteran, a downright scary Navy guy, and a British veteran I think may have been profiled on that "Poker Kings" documentary.

As Adrian Monk says, "Here's what happened."

So far behind in chips, Phan never had a chance to catch up, as he went over the rail on the second hand, going all-in with A-6. Harry had K-J, and the flop came A-K-10, making Phan think a pair of aces was good. A 3 helped no one, but the queen on the river drowned Phan and proved that Harry was one cagey retired military man.

Paul "Eskimo" Clark is a poker veteran and had dominated the table from the outset, so it was only a matter of time before he went headhunting. His target: Tony Bloom. Clark held J-10 against Tony's J-9: a virtual coin flip. A strange flop came J-8-7, giving each a pair of jacks as well as straight draws. With that kind of board, no one could fault Tony's decision to risk it all. Unfortunately for him, fate let him down as it came 3-6 and Clark's higher kicker won the hand.

The next guy to go find himself something else to do was Pete Muller, who faced off with Kinney (who somehow developed a strange blank yet peaceful stare, the kind you do when people first wake you up at some odd hour). Muller held K-6 against Kinney's K-10. The board went Q-7-4-2-2, and once again it fell to the higher kicker to decide a hand. No big fireworks, just whose second card was bigger, in a strange anti-climax.

Now it was down to heads-up play between the big, scary professional who'd come in with a commanding chip lead and this random guy out of the middle of nowhere! Talk about your antitheses. And your antitheses squaring off for a ton of money and a prestigious title on national TV, no less.

Kinney chipped away at Eskimo's stack and finally had him on the ropes. When he finally got it to the end, though, all he held was J-6 against Clark's K-10 - clearly dominated.

Then the board went 9-6-4-7-2. Michael Kinney had made a pair of 6's to defeat a legend, take home a ton of money, and become a WPT champion. To my knowledge, it's the first time a Kevin Walker Award winner has won the event for which they received the award.

And making the end result this:

1. Michael Kinney - $629,469 2. Paul Clark - $310,403 3. Harry Knopp - $155,202 4. Pete Muller - $98,022 5. Tony Bloom - $73,517 6. Young Phan - $57,180

Next week a whole other six people I don't know will battle it out for the WPT Championship. Not Phil Gordon, not Erick Lindgren, not Paul Phillips, not Hoyt Corkins, but six total random people just like Michael Kinney.

To whom I say this: Kevin Walker has taught you well, grasshopper.