Parents: Guidelines

India has always been a country of plenty. Hence, there were also, plenty of kids in each family. The small family norm had not set in. India had not experienced the Indira phenomenon. These midnight’s children took care of themselves. Since there were so many in each family it was not possible to shower each kid with special attention. Hence, with time each of them traced a separate path to individuality. There were loads of family members and the kids did not need special nurturing but somehow managed to learn, grow, play, fight……survive!

With time, new terms were coined. Or perhaps with time as the joint family gave way to a nuclear one individuality gained importance. Initially a child was just one amongst the lot who had to develop and hone his skills as per his capabilities. But in a nuclear family he had to outsmart his peers….how can he not ? So many aspirations were pegged on him…her!

Today, more than the government initiatives, or the Malthus’s prophetic doom, guess, the mounting expenses coupled with the setting in of jet couples and the hectic lifestyle has reduced the average family size.

Now, the nuclear family is closer knit than ever. The parents are actively involved in their kid’s lives. With reduced family size the stakes on each kid is higher. Parents love their children…universal truth…..Right? They want them to have every possible luxury in life. Correct. They want and they ENSURE that they succeed in every field that they trudge in. A little difficult for the tweeny toddlers to deliver and accomplish.

’A child needs space to grow. Today with increasing competition parents have started to put a lot of pressure on their kids. Not only academics…they want them to excel in each and every field… want them to acquire an all rounder personality. This attitude is definitely detrimental for the child in the long run. A lot of pressure makes a child emotionally unstable.’ Says a concerned Psychology student.

Earlier a joint family used to provide one with an anchor in difficult times. There were people around on whom one could’ve had fallen back on, in times of crisis.

The nuclear family cannot afford this cushion of security.

‘Since both of us are working we do not manage to find time for each other but have tried to give our child the best. Be it tuitions, dancing lessons, or the various camps. We just want that she should not miss out on anything.’ says Amit Kapoor, a hassled father.

Best….. is the key word. We, as parents are slogging day in and day out to give you the best, hence, you, the child should deliver …the best…nothing less!! This seems to be the attitude. There is no room for failure.

These excruciating expectations and the attitude are putting undue pressure on the child. The teen suicidal rates are at an all time high. Foremost help the child identify his dreams. The realization of the same would then be a cakewalk and a child’s play…… literally!!