The Telephone is Reigning

Greeting cards are great, flowers are fabulous, and e-mail is engaging, but if Mom has her choice, she'll want to hear the sound of your voice!

Many people use special occasions as reasons to pick up the phone. Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, holidays, birthdays and anniversaries represent peak telephone usage for family members who aren’t able to see each other in person. But people also report that they are just as likely to give their family "a buzz" with no agenda in mind other than catching up, chatting or receiving emotional support. More than any other form of communication, and second only to actually being together in person, the telephone serves as a tremendous catalyst for strengthening family bonds not only on special occasions, but throughout the year.

According to a recent survey conducted by Harris Interactive and sponsored by Modern Woodmen of America, a fraternal financial services organization in Rock Island, Ill., an overwhelming 95 percent of Americans still rely on the telephone to communicate with family. Americans are getting up to speed with technological conveniences, such as e-mail, instant messaging and family Web sites -- more than 62 percent of the survey’s respondents said they use e-mail. But for most people the telephone is more spontaneous, more insightful, more emotionally gratifying and the most convenient of all the long-distance communication options.

A more personal way to communicate

The telephone offers advantages that most other communication methods don’t have -- it’s live, it’s two-way, and it can stimulate a mental image of the other caller simply through the voice inflections and subtle nuances that accompany the spoken words.

"I can tell exactly how my mother-in-law is doing just by hearing her answer the phone," emphasizes Pam Schultz of York, Pa. "I can picture her face, and I know what’s in her head."

Survey results imply that Americans will continue to rely on the telephone no matter what other methods are made available to them. Seventy-three percent of men and 74 percent of women stated it would still be the preferred means, even if online methods were possible.

"I’m just not an e-mail person," admits Jane Bainter of Eldridge, Iowa. "The phone is just quicker and more personal. My family members all have e-mail, and they use it to send us jokes and stories, but we don’t really use it to communicate with each other."

According to John Dommick, professor of journalism and communication at Ohio State University and coauthor of a study on e-mail and telephone usage, this is no surprise. Respondents in his study rated the telephone superior to e-mail for expressing emotion and affection, giving advice and providing companionship.

"Both email and the telephone have their advantages, but people use them for different, specific reasons and to complement one another," says Dommick. "Telephone communication rates very high in sociability. It is definitely more relationship based."

Who you gonna call?

One quick look at the speed dial list on your own telephone will probably tell you a lot about who your fellow Americans call. Moms, dads and siblings garner the most calls. According to the Modern Woodmen survey, over 75 percent of Americans cite these family members as those they are most likely to call. Nearly 25 percent of Americans say that e-mail rates higher for communicating with extended family members, such as cousins.

Telephone usage also varies depending on gender. In general, the women surveyed hold a slight edge in communicating with family no matter what the platform. Ninety-three percent of men and 97 percent of women report that they rely on the telephone to communicate with family, opposed to 56 percent and 67 percent respectively for e-mail.

Nurturing greater family ties

"I told my husband when we moved away from my family that he would have to put up with higher phone bills," says Bainter. "We see my family about once a month, but my relationship with them is definitely stronger because we communicate regularly in between those times."

Nothing beats a hug

"While telephone, e-mail and the Internet have done a lot for fostering greater family bonds, we should not rely on them alone," cautions Dr. Vern Bengtson, professor of gerontology and sociology at the University of Southern California in Los Angeles. "There is a sense of something missing if you do not have face-to-face contact. Body language and gestures say a lot. And touch is very, very important, especially for the very young and very old. You just can’t beat a hug or pat on the shoulder."

The telephone can be an essential tool in sparking family gatherings. After all, you are more likely to want to see your family if you have a greater emotional investment in their lives. Most families that gather together frequently already know the ins and outs of one another’s lives thanks to constant communication.

The next best thing

With the increased chaos of peoples’ lives today, coupled with geographic divides, the telephone is the "next best thing to being there." While nothing can replace in-person contact with your family, telephone communication is a great way to draw your long distance family closer.

"We think people prefer the telephone over e-mail in certain situations because of the richness of the communication," Dommick explains. "When we talk with someone we know well, we are gleaning information from what they don’t say as well as what they do say. There is no such thing as tone of voice in email. Even with the smiley face icons!"

He concludes, "A telephone exchange carries emotionally-loaded information that can’t be duplicated by other long-distance communication."

Which is why, long after the fancy verse in the greeting card has been read and forgotten, the withered flowers have been tossed in the garbage and the e-mail greetings have been systematically deleted, your Mom will remember your voice on the telephone. A voice loaded with meaning, while speaking the simplest of words, "I love you."

For more ideas on how to plan a family gathering, Modern Woodmen’s Web site at www.gatherings.info can offer some great suggestions.

Courtesy of ARA Content

EDITOR’S NOTE: For more information from the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) on ways to lower your long-distance bill, go to www.gatherings.info and click on "Ways to save: tame your long-distance bills."

SIDEBAR

Tame your long-distance bills with these suggestions

Do you cringe every time you see the phone bill in the mailbox? Do your monthly payments create your own personal version of "national debt?" It may be time to look at some tips and suggestions for pruning down your costs, not your talk time, with some creative management.

"Many people can save money on phone calls by using a mix of services," comments Rosemary Kimball, director of media relations for the FCC’s Consumer & Government Affairs Bureau. "They use the traditional wire-line phone service, wireless phone service and prepaid calling cards for different types of calls."

The first step in saving money on your phone bill is to negotiate for the best possible rates on your traditional long-distance service. Consider these tips:

Know your calling pattern -- where and when you call. If you make a lot of long-distance calls, look for a plan with a monthly fee, but a relatively low per-minute charge. If you make the bulk of your long-distance calls in the evenings or weekends, choose a plan whose rates cater to these times. If you make most of your long-distance calls within your own area code, look for a plan that offers the lowest rates for interstate toll calls.

Shop around periodically. It’s up to you to stay informed. Keep up-to-date on the newest calling plans and compare rates among companies. You can find information on the various calling plans on long-distance telephone company Web sites. Another source for information is through free sites such as www.ABToll.com, www.smartprice.com or www.saveonphone.com.

People who do not have Internet access, can call or write their long-distance company to learn how to obtain information. Many companies are also inserting statement stuffers to promote new plans or promotions.

Be aware of the scams and fine print. Among these are "slamming," where a person’s phone service is switched to another carrier without permission. It is also important to understand the fine print. If you are at all uncertain about a plan being offered via a telemarketer, ask to have information outlining the plan sent to you or ask for a Web address that can help you out. If the sales representative is hesitant to do either, you can figure the offer is probably too good to be true.

Offers of free phone cards or limited-time, super-low rates should also ring a warning signal. There is nothing illegal about these kinds of offers, they can just be confusing to a consumer who does not carefully read or fully understand the details. Another legal plan, but often misunderstood, is calling circles. To insure the cheap rate, the people you call must not only be on your specified list, but be utilizing the same carrier service. If you call someone outside that limited circle, you may be hit with higher-than-usual rates.

Getting creative: Cell phones and phone cards

In today’s world, nobody says all your phone contact has to be through the traditional, direct-dial, long-distance service.

With the improved quality and lower cost of cell phones, many people are choosing to use them for personal communications instead of or to complement standard long distance. Many cell phone plans offer free, unlimited weekend and late evening minutes and a set amount of free minutes during the week. If you are a frequent user and you can contain your calls to those times, you could save substantial money over standard long-distance service.

"We urge potential wireless customers to ask the carrier to give them some time -- a couple of days to a month -- to take the phone and test it on areas where they will be calling before committing to a long-term contract," says Kimball. "It’s also important that customers know what the roaming charges are, if any, and whether unused minutes carry over to the next month."

Some people have chosen to forgo a traditional long-distance service altogether and simply engage only their local service. A better option -- choose a long-distance plan with no monthly fee, but a higher per-minute rate. If you never use it, you won’t have to worry about the cost, and if you should need it, it’s always there.

Another option for long-distance users is a prepaid phone card. Traditionally popular with students, business people and travelers, phone cards can also save you money on your own home line when you use them during the hours in which your traditional long-distance rate is higher. In fact, with rates lower than 4 cents a minute, they may offer the best rate any time.

When purchasing a prepaid phone cards, which are available in either dollar amounts or by number of minutes, consider these tips:

Purchase a card that offers a long-term usage date or no expiration date.

Purchase a card from a reputable company -- ask around and find one that receives high marks from other users.

Watch for cards that have hidden charges or rates higher than advertised.

Watch for cards that charge you even when your call does not go through.

Purchase a card with a small number of minutes and the least amount of money until you are satisfied that the card is providing the service you want at the charge you expect. You’ll want cards that will allow you to purchase more minutes easily and without extra charges.