Musical Mondegreens

Mondegreens :

Mondegreens are the slips that happen when you hear the wrong word - like when you mishear song lyrics - a sort of aural malapropism (the unintentional and often hilarious slip made by incorrect word usage).

The term mondegreen was originally coined half a century ago by the author Sylvia Wright in a magazine article. It came from her childhood remembrance of a favorite Scottish Ballad, 'The Bonny Earl of Murray'.

The actual ballad is -

Ye highlands and ye lowlands
Oh where hae you been?
Thou hae slay the Earl of Murray
And laid him on the green.

Sylvia Wright had misheard it as -

Ye highlands and ye lowlands
Oh where hae you been?
Thou hae slay the Earl of Murray
And Lady Mondegreen

She was mighty disappointed to learn it was the Earl that was buried and not Lady Mondegreen that was slain.

Here is a selection of misheard lyrics from popular songs, hymns, and carols:

1. "Gladly, the cross-eyed bear."
Actual - "Gladly The Cross I'd Bear." (Traditional Hymn)

2. "There's a bathroom on the right."
Actual - "There's a bad moon on the rise." (Bad Moon Rising, by Creedence Clearwater Revival)

3. "I got no towel, I hung it up again."
Actual - "I get knocked down, but I get up again." (Tubthumping, by Chumbawumba)

4. "Just brush my teeth before you leave me, baby."
Actual - "Just touch my cheek before you leave me, baby." (Angel of the Morning, by Juice Newton)

5. "Excuse me while I kiss this guy."
Actual - "Excuse me while I kiss the sky." (Purple Haze, by Jimi Hendrix)

6. "You and me and Leslie."
Actual - "You and me endlessly..." (Groovin', by The Rascals)

7. "Midnight after you're wasted."
Actual - "Midnight at the oasis." (Midnight at the Oasis, by Maria Muldaur)

8. "Sleep in heavenly peas."
Actual - "Sleep in heavenly peace." (Silent Night, Christmas carol)

9. "Dead ants are my friends; they're blowin' in the wind."
Actual - "The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind." (Blowin' In The Wind, by Bob Dylan)

10. "The girl with colitis goes by."
Actual - "The girl with kaleidoscope eyes." (Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds, by The Beatles)

11. "She's got a chicken to ride."
Actual - "She's got a ticket to ride." (Ticket to Ride, by The Beatles)

12. "I blow bubbles when you are not here."
Actual - "My world crumbles when you are not here." (I Try, by Macy Gray)

13. "Sunday monkey won't play piano song, play piano song."
Actual - "Sont des mots qui vont tres bien ensemble; tres bien ensemble." (Michelle, by The Beatles)

14. "I'll be your xylophone waiting for you."
Actual - "I'll be beside the phone waiting for you." (Build Me Up Buttercup, by The Foundations)

15. "Are you going to starve an old friend?"
Actual - "Are you going to Scarborough Fair?" (Scarborough Fair, by Simon and Garfunkel)

16. "Baking carrot biscuits."
Actual - "Taking care of business." (Takin' Care Of Business, by Bachman-Turner Overdrive)

17. "Donuts make my brown eyes blue."
Actual - "Don't it make my brown eyes blue." (Don't It Make My Brown Eyes Blue, by Crystal Gale)

18. "Got a lot of lucky peanuts."
Actual - "Got a lot of love between us." (Let's Hang On, by Frankie Vallee and the Four Seasons)

19. "What a nice surprise when you're out of ice."
Actual - "What a nice surprise bring your alibis." (Hotel California, by Eagles)

20. "Found my nasty salt."
Actual - "Found my nest of salt." (All Apologies, by Nirvana)

21. "I'm a pool hall ace."
Actual - "My poor heart aches." (Every Step You Take, The Police)

22. "I'm blotto and bravado/I'm a scarecrow and a Beatle".
Actual - "A mulatto, an albino/A mosquito, my libido." (Smells Like Teen Spirit, by Nirvana)

23. "Hope the city voted for you."
Actual - "Hopelessly devoted to you." (From the film Grease, by Olivia Newton-John)

24. "There's no sex in Ohio/There's no sex in Rhode Island."
Actual - "There's no sex in your violence/There's no sex in your violence." (Everything Zen, by Bush)

25. "I got no fortune in Guam."
Actual - "I ain't no fortunate son." (Fortunate Son, by Creedence Clearwater Revival)

26. "We don't chat at a lighthouse."
Actual - "Big ol' jet airliner." (Jet Airliner, by Steve Miller Band)

27. "Edith was troubled by a horrible ass."
Actual - "Egypt was troubled by the horrible asp." (Man on the Moon, by R.E.M.)

28. "I shoot a wad into her hair."
Actual - "I smell the rose in her hair." (Louie, Louie, by The Kingsmen)

29. "Tell her I'll never lay her again."
Actual - "I tell her I never leave again." (Louie Louie, by The Kingsmen)

30. "I'm not the cat I used to be/I've got a can of thirty-three babies."
Actual - "I've got a kid, I'm thirty-three, baby." (Middle of the Road, by The Pretenders)

31. "I'll never leave your pizza burning."
Actual - "I'll never be your beast of burden." (Beast of Burden, by The Rolling Stones)

32. "I see a Renoir and I want to paint it black."
Actual - "I see a red door and I want to paint it black." (Paint It, Black, by The Rolling Stones)

33. "You wore a skirt made of cream cheese."
Actual - "You wore a shirt of violent green." (What's the Frequency, Kenneth?, by R.E.M.)

34. "Chug-a-lug, strawberry man."
Actual - "Jungle love is drivin' me mad." (Jungle Love, by Steve Miller Band)

35. "Batman watergun."
Actual - "Bad moon wine again." (Glycerine, by Bush)

36. "She's got electric boobs, her mom has two."
Actual - "She's got electric boots and mohair shoes." (Bennie and the Jets, by Elton John)

37. "Laymen yell, "Oh son!""
Actual - "Lemon-yellow sun." (Jeremy, by Pearl Jam)