I do!

I do!

In an era gone by marriages were for a lifetime…… well so were the durables like refrigerator / TV sets. Now the definition and hence the time lines of durability have undergone a change.

Marriage was a norm. ….an acceptable, predictable, next step in life ,post reaching a certain age. It was based on trust and commitment between two…….families. The two individuals tying the sacrosanct knot were the least important of all in this huge decision taking process. Hundreds of proposals were invited and then analyzed and later verified through various sources. It was a time to celebrate a new life for the couple and the old memories for the relatives who traversed miles from different parts of the country for this once in a lifetime occasion for the couple in discussion and one of the yearly trips that the numerous relatives made with a different wedding lined up each year.

A meeting point which led to many more weddings being planned in the weeklong activity schedule. More weddings were fixed, an update on deaths and weddings and births was shared, a new, fresh barometer and hence benchmark of wealth was compiled.

Post all this activity the couple were left to their own fate and deeds where as the entire pack departed to meet again the next year with a different wedding but similar settings and faces.

Earlier post the departure of the relatives the couple easily adjusted to mild domesticity. The transition was one, which did not take much of an effort for the couple as they had their role models in close vicinity. Relatives, who made it their mission to make the young bride learn the tricks of the trade………. Cooking problems, Kitchen politics, Husband maneuvering.. the bible with all the solutions was handed down from generations.

With career gaining precedence over marriage for the better halves the frequency of weddings and hence the meeting occasions have decreased. With independence and financial security, the concept of the institution of marriage has also weathered. Compromise, the plank on which it was based since ages is no more relevant. As every business transaction it is also more of a profit and loss analysis. A barter deal, which is thoughtfully analyzed and then agreed upon by two individuals. The family ceases to play a role in the transaction.

Today in a nuclear, DINKS (Double Income No Kids), DINS (Double Income No Sex) age, (Phew!!) the compromises do exist, the adjustments, though are still being made at every step yet the definition of the same has undergone a change.

If it is aligning the respective time and the work schedules of the couple so that they can spend some days of the week together …then they, I do!!

If it involves sharing equal responsibilities right from the kitchen duties to the bickering and politicking of the work place ….. then they say , I do!!

If it is an arrangement ,wherein words like Freedom, Identity and Space do not lose their significance.. then they say, I do!!

If it is a relationship which is based on friendship rather than ageing and orthodox constructs.. then they say, I do!!

If it entails living, loving and growing ……..together, yet maintaining separate individual identities.. then they say, I do!!

But foremost, before committing and mouthing ..’ I do's' the jet age couples believe in analyzing what they CAN do for each other and for themselves in the process.