Managing Relationships

Drawing Similarities
There are various types of complex interactions happening; you'll realize as you come across a cross section of people in this world. As your field-of-play increases, so also does the complexity of interaction.

Let's make you understand through a small example. If you’re just sitting in a cubicle, working on your computer with just only one other person, you need only a little understanding; but if you’re managing a thousand people, you need a vast understanding of everybody. You may not be able to decipher people's minds but you would have addressed them as per what is largely understood. Many thinkers and philosophers are well known in their field as they can understand and address the voice of the audience at large.

Considering that you are managing a thousand people and you would want all these people to understand you, then let me tell you that you will end up managing nothing! You need to first understand the limitations and the capabilities of these thousand people and do all that you can! It is only then that you will be empowered to move the situation the way you want it to go. Can you imagine the torture most of these speakers go through while managing a crowd! In that case, if you have to manage your better half or even your lover, it would sound as a much better and easier thing to do, don't you think?

Managing Relationships
The closer the relationship, the more effort you need to make to understand it. All the books in the world that preach you to compromise are half-truths according to me. After all how long can you blindly go on compromising?

There comes a time in your life where your limitations as a person simply give away and what really remain are two distinct aspects in managing relationships. One of them is diplomacy and the other is understanding. Humans as per their nature can only feel comfortable if they understand as to where they are heading. You can understand someone closer and dearer only if you make yourself be understood and vice versa. Here again, what is interlinked is the power of communication. Many a times words are as important weapons as the most powerful of all.

Communicating with your spouse not only makes the other person aware of how and what you feel. It also makes for interesting conversation. Make it a point to converse and discuss what ever you feel is important. It may be just that whiff of air in the morning that gives you a great high on your walk back home, after a tiresome work out. It may even be poetry. You don't have to be aren't admirers of writers or poetry to strike a good note.

You'll note that as you age, there'll be many more things of similar interests to you and will help you have a great confidante in terms of a life partner. More often than not while taking our roles seriously as man and wife, we tend to make note of the people's opinions rather than our own. We depend on our relatives, our parents for emotional advice rather than talking it out in the open.

For some of the most important decisions in life we've noticed that our elders tend to muddle our heads with their experience and our sub-conscience plies on that and we react accordingly.

Understanding and Maintaining relationships
In your relationships, you have fought many more battles than this and are still fighting; aren't you?

The I-told-you-so's and I-knew-you-would do this, are all a part of different people clashing over different mind-sets. This is also because your line of understanding is quite different from theirs. If you cross this LOC, this Line of Control, neither of you can live in peace. If your partner crosses it, then you'd get mad and also vice versa! If you move your understanding beyond your spouse's, their understanding become a part of your understanding. It is quite possible that you will be able to embrace their limitations and capabilities.

Almost all of us at all given times face positives and negatives in life. It is important that through understanding and by using a bit of diplomacy you get your path straightened out. It might be tough to get a hang over diplomacy, as there are very few schools of diplomacy. But then once you do the worlds your oyster. Diplomacy stems from understanding your benefits. The closer you get to reach this, in a manner that is quiet in a way and yet gets you the best results, you are sure to fine tune your senses to being the best diplomat.

Managing relationships is about nothing but this...Once you understand the situation; you need to but put on the diplomatic act to bend it to your favor. Understanding the situation alone might not help. Try it out. It sure will give you some food for thought!