Cruel reality

How cruel not to be able to breathe
from the spasms of the lungs dying to get out this pain within knowing that you are a kind person
knowing that you are that martyr who would never
knowingly or willfully hurt me in any way
but I sit here, minute after minute, day after day, year after year with everyone around me finding their true paths and love and yet I sit here, saddened to my very core
shaken at the thought that my one true love has come and gone I have tried many mans arms
in vain hopes of trying to forget your haunting love
trying to fill the empty sadness that I feel when I think of you
I miss you when I smile,
I miss you when I am making love to someone else
I miss you when I kiss someone else
I try to fill the time with things that I know make me feel good
but many years have gone by and your memory only has become stronger and more painful to deal with. I can sit and talk on the phone with you, and try to tell you how i feel
but you simply spur me on, telling me to better my life telling me that I can make my dreams come true' telling me that I can make my second chance come around again
if you only knew that I only want this dream to come true to be able to come closer
to be able to be the person and woman that you deserve
you are the driving force
how cruel this love can be
with no guarantees, only the cruel reality that you are far from me
only the cruel reality that our paths will not cross any time soon
how cruel this love has been