The Rookie

These are the horrible moves of the blindfold game I played against Nigel Short last week. Now it is me who needs the blindfold.

1. e4 b6 2. d4 e6 3. Bd3 Bb7 4. Nf3 Be7 5. 0-0 Nf6 6. Re1 0-0 7. c4 d6 8. Nc3 d5 9. cxd5 exd5 10. e5 Nfd7 11. Qc2 h6 12. Bf4 c6 13. Qd2 g5 14. Be3 f5 15. exf6 (en passant) Bxf6 16. h4 c5 17. hxg5 hxg5 18. Bxg5 Bxg5 19. Nxg5 Qf6 20. Re6 Qf4 21. Rg6+ Kh8 22. Qe2 Qh4 23. g3 1-0

Nigel did not spare me in assessing this game. Our hero, Paul Morphy, would be turning in his grave - the neglect of the centre; the loss of tempo by moving a pawn to d6 and then d5 in consecutive moves; the failure to develop my pieces on the queenside; the desperate square I found for the one knight that did manage to leave home. Horrible. Again, after a dozen moves I was lost. No wonder Nigel was yawning. And did he really need that mosquito net? This was one mosquito that was never going to bite.

"Your moves just didn't make sense," Nigel chided. "If you were going to play d5, you should have played it straight away, although it's not a very good move. After d6, you should have followed it up more modestly. You struck prematurely; you should have played a move like Nd7. You've played too passively but you shouldn't then lash out to try to make up for it. If you've got a solid-looking position, make your opponent work. I have to decide on a plan and it's not very clear which is the right way to play. Keep the tension. By lashing out, you made my decision for me. You allowed my attack to build up too quickly on the kingside: you saw what was coming when I played Qd2, but g5 is a sign of utter desperation."

"I saw it as a bold manoeuvre," I interjected, somewhat hurt. "Bold manoeuvre," the doctor repeated contemptuously. "After this you can say that you are completely lost unless you have some sort of tactical means of playing: g4, which appears to win my knight, fails to Bxh6. Your king is defenceless. Everything wins. It's a pity I couldn't win it in a pretty way, but g3 is the most effective."

Hey, you're supposed to be teaching me, not torturing me. This could be one of those cures that end up killing the patient.