| Name |
Views and Comments | Date |
| TROUBLED MOM |
This was also good for me to see, i just stumbled upon it for a reason! My 13 year old an I also have major issues, an it really breaks my heart! :{ It is at the point of marital problems,my husband supports both of us ,but it is at the point of not knowing what to do now. Even though he is a good kid an respect others! But for some reason I as a mother I do not get any of that! IDEAS? |
11/28/2009 |
| christina |
This is good for me to read. Im having trouble communicating with my 13 yr. 0ld boy. I also have my issues like all I know to do is yell, get out of my face and your grounded and I nagg. How do I stop my own cycle of madness? |
11/19/2009 |
| Maria Mccoy |
my son is a great kid. He is 16 and considerate. The problem is that he try to please everybody in order to keep the peace. He wants to be popular, but he is not being successful. He has a group of friend, but I think he is just following them trying to fit in. He told me hes other friends become his friends when the main leader of the group is not there. He told me that he can't wait to graduate so when he goes to college he cans start fresh. What can he do to try to fit in? I want him to be himself. It makes me sad to think that he thinks that when he goes to college things will be different. What if they are not? What then? |
10/25/2009 |
| Teri |
Nice article. My son and I need help. I feel like I'm treading water trying to get close. It hurts my feelings. I love him so much and want to help. |
6/12/2009 |
| Lucy |
Beth promise me you wont let your hubby do that! from experience that is the worst thing imaginable. dont dont dont do it. you will drive your son away and if it goes on for too long his unconditional love wont last. fear is the worst thing for a parent to do for their child. talk to him and try let him understand if this doesnt happen ask a sibling to. p.s. maybe you do dote on you older daughter kids dont just say that for no reason.
sarah i agree with you about the "Dad" dilemma. goodluck for you both. |
4/6/2009 |
| Sarah |
"Dad" i get what your saying and all but i think your only looking at it from your own perspective. This is coming from experience when i say that although your kids love you we dont live easy lifestyles. we have so many worries that get worse and worse by the day some of them adults dont even think really matter. but that doesnt take-away the fact that it DOES matter to the kid no matter the enormity of it. you may feel as though you are helping him and stuff but if he doesnt feel comfortable around you then things have to change. if he doesnt need a job dont force him to have one. a job at maccas really isnt going to teach you anything too valuable unless you want to stay in that business until you retire. and thats coming from experience as well. live in the present not his future. |
4/6/2009 |
| Liam B |
and too "DAD" things have away of sorting themselves out but it will of course take work on your half and your sons, good luck i hope to hear everything's going well =) |
1/18/2009 |
| Liam B |
And I am a teenage boy of 14 and don't have problems expressing myself, but i'am aware that others do have difficulties sharing in opinion and can see no long term solution to the problem and I guess that it is an essential part of life and reverting out of adolescence, thanxs for posting this article |
1/18/2009 |
| Liam B |
On the most part I agree with what you've said, BUT not all male adolescence are like that of which you've categorised them as, mopping sad lads how are unable too express feelings of compassion and love |
1/18/2009 |
| Theresa |
Many of these writers are obviously illiterate. Talk about atrocious spelling and grammatical errors! Can't people take the time to pick up a dictionary? You should be ashamed of yourselves if you can't write better than a third grader. What kind of role models are you to your children?
Anyway, I can completely relate to "Dad" and his article about his teenage son. I too have a son going through teenage angst, and from what I've been told, we should love them, express what makes us proud of them, and yet try to stand firm in our beliefs at the same time. Not an easy task! By the way "Dad," I think you are right to take away your son's allowance if he is not earning it. You sound like a good and loving father. Don't worry - everything works out in the end when a child has been raised properly. |
1/3/2009 |
| Dad |
Thanks for this! I am full time Dad of a 16 year old. My Son appears to be a very confident person, he's intelligent, popular, trendy, charming all the things that make me think that he's happy and well rounded.
He has a good social life and is rarely indoors.
He has been living with me for the past 5 years, we have had our ups n downs, but I feel I am trying to my best by him, teaching him, discipline and how to handle life situations. He is my pride n joy and often gloat about him, however yesterday he broke down in an argument and said that I put a lot of pressure on him, and take my bad days out on him. He says I don't appreciate what he does i.e. washing up and tidying up, he says I am always going on at him, because I have said he should find a summer job, rather playing on the computer all night long and sleeping during the day.
I appreciate that he's a teenager, however I am trying my utmost to stop him getting into that lazy mode, trying to prepare him that he will need to work hard if he is to succeed.
I feel that I have to constantly remind him to switch electrical items off, put his clothes in the laundry bag, do the washing up etc.. then he feels that all I do is moan.
Because of his lack of effort in finding a job, I have stopped his allowance.
I am feeling hurt at the fact that I try to do all by him, provide him with a quality lifestyle, without any input from his Mother, yet I am looked on as a dictator in his life, he says the reason he is not indoors, is because he doesn't feel that he can relax without me getting at him. |
8/15/2008 |
| teezee |
nice article |
8/6/2008 |
| DIane |
This article is silly and doesn't really address ANY issue. Maybe the fact that males are less communicative but that is well known.
Useless to me. (Mother of 16 year old boy) |
7/9/2008 |
| Jennifer |
I have a 14 year old son who is very kind-hearted, friendly and an overall wonderful person. However, he is hanging on to some bad habits that I need help with. He is very obnoxious, he has developed horrible table manners that were not always there, and he can be rather rude at times. Any advice? |
6/12/2008 |
| beth |
my son is 14 and he feels eventhough i try keep comunications open, that i do not love him he tinks i favor my oldest daughter.
my husband looses patients with him and thinks he is a smart ass, but i beleive he is just tring to asort his individuality. my husband wants to put fear into his relationship and i believe this will push him away even more. how do i keep my son close and reasure him that i care for him as much as his sibling. |
6/9/2008 |
| annonomouse |
OK i have a boyfriend and hes very sweet and adorable now i dont know wat i should do i am scared to make a move cause i am just shy plz post a comment on wat i should do cause i am stuck i have so far gave him 4 hugs and a kiss on the check wats my next step plz comment bac. A.S.A.P
thx alote
|
4/26/2008 |
| Sydney |
Ok i think its wrong for wat ur child did because i mean he s a child it depends how old he is but boys will be boys. |
4/26/2008 |
| AM |
I've caught my son stealing money from me before and I ask where it's going to be spent at. He always tells me. Usually for a game, CD or movie. I'm strapped most the time and don't make a lot of money, but to avoid temptation for my son and me coming up short and angry, I had a perfectly frank talk WITH my son and not AT my son. He sees now what I make, and he thought it was a lot, now he knows we are borderline poverty. I ask him if he needs any money or wants me to put a game on lay-away for him and we go over and review a lot of things together. He picks what he wishes and I place it on lay away. Or he just wants a bit of cash to go to the movies with his buds. It works out best for both of us. |
1/24/2008 |
| anita |
would like know if a mother caught a son stealing cash for the first time and child admit that he has done a wrong thing what should a mother do please reply asap |
1/8/2008 |
| Tara |
She does not understand teenage boys. |
10/12/2007 |
| ~F |
Wow, I found that article to be well thought out and written. Everything about it seems pretty much true. I'm not sure if this was only meant to be read by my moms, but the only part I didn't like was when it said "Being a mother," because not all guys, me for instance, are the people deciding men shouldn't feel lonely or helpless or anything like that. |
9/24/2007 |
| TAIA |
URE RIGHT! THEY NEVER SHOW THEIR EMOTIONS.THEY THNK THEY ARE OK ,THAT THEY CAN HANDLE ANYTHINK.............BOYS |
7/31/2007 |
| nobody loves me |
my dad is dead. my mother hates me she says that i drove my father to his death bed she says that i have 2 move out what do i do. parents dont understand |
5/14/2007 |
| down |
hi im on the edge what should i do school and life is geting to me dont cry for me cause im already dead |
5/14/2007 |
| hitch |
life isnt all about school and homework u need to learn how to have a bit of craic at the same time |
5/14/2007 |
| hitch |
parents need to listen and they need to make time for their kids to have fun and to cumunicate with them and please chilaxe u only live once |
5/14/2007 |
| charlie |
This is another useless artical commenting on the mask behind which teenage boys hide, perents of teenages need to negociate stiff boundaries and stick to them if they want to help and control thier teenage sons |
1/20/2007 |
| Frank |
Thanks to Gina Skinner and to prerna for all the great tips. I know communication is important but I admit I find it really hard to always swallow my pride and make the first step and approach them and sometimes they dont seem to care. I usually do all the talking and everything I say falls on deaf ears... I realize I should maybe say nothing at all and try hold back on advice, maybe I have to blame myself and not the kids that we have bad communication especilly with the oldest two. I do love them very much and sometimes I want to tell them but I cant... I know Im being stupid but its really hard. Also Gina thanks youve opened my eyes with the older kids getting the blame and youngest one getting off lightly all the time. I realize now how unfair that is! The youngest sometimes throws things at her brothers and snatches their things and they hit back or shout at her then get told off when my daughter cries. When she was tiny my wife and I thought that was cute and the boys thought that, too but now she often provokes them and just gets on their nerves. The nine year old is sometimes very clingy especially with my wife. My kids are 4, 9, 12 and 15 youngest a girl the others all boys. Thanks again from a stressed out father |
9/26/2006 |
| monica |
The article is great the picture is silly and outdated |
9/24/2006 |
| jessica |
name me some boy names
|
9/21/2006 |
| khadijah |
wuz up this be your girl khadijah on her i would like to help you |
8/26/2006 |
| khadijah |
i think you should try to talk to someone and help you
|
8/26/2006 |
| khadijah |
how do you do bye your self or are you takecare of your baby bye your self all time get back at me |
8/26/2006 |
| Katyayini Angre |
I have a 16 year old brother, he's my cousin and his parents are working so they can't give him much time. He takes me as his best friend and tells me all his feelings btu at times i feel he is disturbed about something how should I handle that? iam his 20 year old sister. |
8/24/2006 |
| Frank |
my teenagers are 15 and 14.they are gifted musicians and they are exposed to entertainment where they compete. they have been winning. my 15 yr old was choosen to compete in singing live aired on radio. I love my boys i get lost trying to disiplan |
8/20/2006 |
| Gina Skinner |
Hi...
I agree that communication is the key. But most parents forget that doesn't mean they do all the talking. Parents need to listen as well and keep an open mind. Don't push your opinions on them.
Tell and show your teenager that you love them and be there for them when they need you. Don't break a promise. If you think you might not be able to keep a promise, better don't make it in the first place.
Try to be a good example. Don't swear in front of them, and don't let them see you in an unacceptable situation, like drunk or violent. If you do something wrong, admit it and apologize the same way you expect it from them. If you don't want them to smoke, you shouldn't either. Be responsible.
Most importantly, make time for them. Spend time with them whenever possible. Ask what they'd like to do and have some fun together. Don't take everything too seriously. Laugh together. Try to see the funny side of things.
Remember your own teenage years and how you felt. Try to see their point of view.
If you have younger children, don't automatically blame the oldest child when they argue or something goes wrong. The same rules should apply to all the kids when it comes to behavior. Some parents allow a small child to misbehave because they find it "cute" but shout at an older child if he does the same thing. This is highly unfair and will lead to frustration. Parents often believe they must leap to the rescue of their younger children all the time and forget their tenagers are also children - their children, just the same.
Good luck to everyone out there!
Gina Skinner, mother of a (very confident and head-strong) 14 year old |
2/3/2006 |
| prerna |
HI readers, Thanks for posting your messages. To sum up the answers to all your querries, let me tell you that the key to dealing with teenage children is nothing but good communication. Often we hear parents who wonder of different ways and means to talk to their kids. If you need to talk to them as a friend, a parent or even as a relative, it's best if you speak to them at their comfortable time, and openly stating the facts and repurcussions. This may relate to just about anything. Teens need to be given the situational reactions to the various events that cross their lives. Tell them the pros and cons of each aspect of their inquisitive mind and leave it for them to understand what's the best thing in thier favor. This not only helps them develop and empower their brain but also makes them independant in a way. Despite the reason for them not being approachable or all "shelled in", you need to make the first attempt in driving them through their worries; in time they will turn to you for advise. Do let me know if you have any further questions. All the best to all! Cheers prerna |
9/28/2005 |
| need t find |
help me
|
9/13/2005 |
| Sandra |
This is great. But will it work for friends who you think are in need of someone to talk to and open up too? I need help with a teenage boy who is a good friend of mine. |
3/7/2005 |
| susan |
What should we do to help our son? He does talk to me and he admits he feels empty inside. He says he lives in a shell. |
2/18/2005 |
| Thomas Scott Sr |
I will becoming a full time dad of teenage boys. Can you send me articles on what I need to do? Thank You.
Thomas Scott Sr.
3295 Landline Road
Selma, AL 36701 |
2/2/2005 |
