Writing a Break up Letter to Your Boyfriend

Saying goodbye, going away
Seems like goodbye's such a hard thing to say
Touching a hand, wondering why
It's time for saying goodbye.

A relationship is something, which needs to be valued and nurtured so that it enriches your life. However a break-up is necessary if one or both the partners are not satisfied. If you are planning to break-up with your boyfriend, the first thing that you need to do is think about it rationally. Think whether you are just mad at him over an issue, which can be sorted through constructive communication, or is it something you have been thinking about since quite a while.

You cannot see a future with your boyfriend any more, you found out he cheated on you, you think he is not ‘the one’. No matter what your reason, if you have decided to break-up with your boyfriend, it is time to think of a simple and straightforward way to convey this to him. Breaking up with your boyfriend might be one of the things that you are dreading the most, but if you know you have to do it someday or the other, you might do it as soon as possible - like one quick action of ripping off a band-aid. Relationships need to be handled with care, even when you are saying goodbye or breaking-up; remember that this was the person you loved the most at some point in your life.

Do You Really Want to Break up with Your Boyfriend?

Before you finalize your decision make sure that it's is not a hasty decision or an emotional gimmick to get his attention. A break-up should be one of the last resorts, only after you know you have worked enough to make the relationship work and no matter how hard you try, things don’t seem to work out. Although issues like infidelity cannot be tolerated and should not be tolerated, there are other relationship problems that could be sorted out by communicating with each other. Try and think, of all the times, you have spent together and focus on all the positive aspects of your relationship. Weigh your decision rationally, and think whether you really want to break up with your boyfriend. Try and analyze the situation for at least a week. If you think you need help with the decision, try and talk to your family or close friends who could help you with your decision. Reach a conclusion, after you have thought about the situation with a balanced and rational approach.

Doesn’t the Idea of a Break up Letter Seem Too Crude?

Most relationship experts will agree to the fact that breaking up with someone over the phone or conveying the message via an email or a letter might be a bad idea; however there are instances where you just cannot communicate all the things that you want your boyfriend to know before breaking up with him. Writing a break-up letter might help you to think clearly of all the things that you want to say to him. Also, instead of sending him the message through the letter and shying away from facing him again, you can use the letter to start the conversation. Sit with him as he reads the letter and once he has read everything you had to say, both of you can discuss the issue and reach a consensus about the whole thing.

Writing the Break up Letter

If after all this, you have decided to write a break-up with your boyfriend and need to write a letter to him, here are a few things that you should keep in mind, while writing a break-up letter to your boyfriend:

• First of all, remember - keep it as straightforward as possible, however, there is a fine line between being straightforward and being rude. Try and keep it as polite as possible.
• Talk about what your relationship is lacking or what are the problems that you think are hindering your relationship and have led you to believe that a break-up remains to be the only solution.
• Avoid insults or snide remarks, while you write the break-up letter. You don’t want to get into an endless cycle of mud-slinging.
• Try and avoid using sentences like "I want to call it off" or "I’ve had enough of you"; instead use sentences like "I think we need to move on" or "I think it is time for us to think whether our relationship has a future".
• Do not make it sound like you are dumping him, instead try and explain how parting ways might be the right thing to do for both of you in the long run.
• If you have made up your mind about breaking up and won't budge for sure, do not write anything which would give him the idea that you might change your decision, if he acts in a particular manner or gives you the things that you think are missing from a relationship.
• Although, you are ending the relationship, do not forget to thank the person genuinely for all the good times you shared. Try and let go all the grudges and part ways without being bitter.