Work Excuses

Everyone has made use of excuses to get out of work at some point in time or another. Some of these excuses have worked out for people, whereas some have not been convincing enough. The fact remains that as long as people are employed by organizations, there will be plenty of instances, where an individual will have to come up with some believable excuses to get out of work.

The best ones can range from the sympathetically believable, to the sublime and the ridiculous. Not everyone can manage to use these excuses to maximum benefit, but there are some people who do manage to get away with everything, thanks to their amazing repertoire of excuses. If you really apply your mind, you can come up with something for pretty much any situation - being late for work, not showing up at work, goofing off at work, missing deadlines, stealing stationery, making fun of colleagues, absconding from work or rubbing the boss the wrong way.

Getting Out of Work

This is probably the most common purpose for which excuses are made, because let's face it, sometimes the office just seems like a wretched place to go and spend a beautiful day.

1. I'm sick.
2. I have to take my pet to the vet today.
3. I have to take my family member to the doctor today.
4. I have to pick up a friend at the airport.
5. My car is giving me trouble, so I have to fix it.
6. The water pipes in my basement broke, and its flooded now.
7. My relative went into labor, and I'm the only one around.
8. I have a dentist appointment.
9. I have woman issues (if you are in fact a woman).
10. I developed a severe case of head lice.

By using these excuses, you can come up with many more excuses that might actually work. Keep in mind the frequency with which you use them though, as that will determine the believability of these excuses.

Being Late for Work

Being late for work is not an abnormal occurrence and sometimes it is totally out of one's control. Waking up in the morning is a tough task for many people and this leads to a serious disruption of the daily routine that one follows. Here are some work excuses if you are running late.

1. I accidentally drove to my old office out of habit.
2. The route I take to work was blocked by a Presidential motorcade.
3. I have a case of temporary amnesia and I couldn't remember where I work.
4. I had a flat tire.
5. My dog ate my breakfast and got sick after that.
6. My car experienced brake failure.
7. I was called to the police station this morning for illegal possession of an armed weapon.
8. I was waiting for the alcohol level in my blood to drop to permissible limits.
9. I couldn't find my fake teeth in the morning.
10. I just didn't think you would notice.

Use these excuses at your own indiscretion, because they could inadvertently land you in more trouble than you already are. Most employers are quite well versed with the most commonly used excuses and will see through your lies almost immediately.

Funny Excuses

Now if your boss is someone who does not take himself too seriously, you can try out some funny excuses. If he's an easygoing person he will understand that sometimes people do end up getting late due to circumstances out of their control and he will just look past it. But it goes without saying, that if you are repeatedly goofing off, he will lose his temper sooner or later.

1. I have a severe urinary tract infection, so I have no control over my visits to the restroom.
2. I accidentally locked my car keys inside the car.
3. A tree fell down in my street, and blocked the traffic there for hours.
4. A bee bit me, and sparked off a severe allergic reaction which spread to my entire face.
5. I witnessed a hit and run accident and the cops want to question me.
6. Someone broke into my house last night, and now I'm getting a security system installed.
7. The Gas Company (or the Water Department) are to read my meter, and this is the only time they can come.
8. My kid got arrested and I have to go bail him out.
9. I have a session with my therapist for my terribly eccentric and schizophrenic behavior.
10. My biological clock is ticking and I'm running out of time.

Some of these work-related excuses may work for you, whereas some won't. Use some ingenuity, and you can come up with a lot more. At the end of the day, remember that you will have to go to work sooner or later and face the music. Good luck.