Whispered Dreams - Chapter 23 Fixing Stuff

Zoey's point of view

It was minutes before the bell would ring, and all the people were there, where they were supposed to be, including me. Jake was walking slow and steady, he was about to walk to his history class.

"Jake" I yelled to him, walking through the empty hallway.

He stopped in his place, I could picture his face in my mind, deciding whether to look back or pretend he didn't hear me. If he decided to go away, I swear I'm gonna kick his ass. I could feel his anger and my anger boiling up at pretty much the same rate. It wasn't a new thing; we WERE always in a same level of mood.

"Don't even think of ignoring me, Jake. We've been doing this for the whole week now"

He just stood there. Great! Now I've got to do all the talking. Well that's fair I guess, I created this mess, I'll finish it as well. Let's start working!

"Jake..." I was about to start my whining and all that when Jake turned and started walking.

Shit! Was my confession so bad that he can't even talk to me now? He must think I'm some sort of stalker. I stared at his now distant figure. I was dumbfounded. When I said I'd fix this I wasn't thinking Jake could ignore me when I was trying to speak. Well, change of plans!

"Follow me" he said as he probably realized I wasn't following him.

Okay... at least he's not running away thinking I'm a psychopath. 1 point to team Zoey!

He walked and walked, felt like forever to me. The thoughts in my head were so loud that I almost missed the bell ringing.

He smartly and sneakily moved to the parking lot, towards his car. Good gracious, no one saw us!

"Jake what are you doing?" I hissed as he took the driver's seat.

"Get inside" was the only reply I got.

I did what I was ordered, and grumpily locked my seat belt. Well, all my plans went out the window, so much for the long, no-awkwardness speech.

He drove away from the school in silence. I swear we didn't utter a single word throughout the drive. It was weird, me not talking to him, when he was right by my side looking so damn angry. Why the hell was HE angry?

He drove us to somewhere quiet and secluded. When I got out the car, it was amazing. The view in front of me could not be real. The trees lined up in the long road ahead of us, sun streaking here and there from the little space that the tree gave them. Was there even a place like this in our city? Shut up Zo, you got something more important right now, i ordered myself.

"I believe we have something to talk about." I heard Jake say.

Well, at least he is on the same page as I am.

"Yeah... that we have" I said as I banged the door close.

"Hey... don't hate the car" he chuckled.

I saw his smile after such a long time; I felt such warmth at the sight. It was like old times once again. Seriously, my life was so much better when this drama wasn't such a big part of it.

He walked to my side and took my hands like he used to and started walking at a slow place to, well in front of us. I have no idea where we were. We walked like that for a while, in silence.

"Since you brought the topic first, why don't you start first?" I said, as I looked anywhere, but his face.

How the hell am I supposed to face him?

"I was getting to that part" he announced.

I waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

"Well??" I asked growing impatient.

"Look... Zoey, I didn't mean to be such a pussy about this entire situation, but..." he said rubbing his face from his free hand.

He never left my hand. So sweet!

"C'mon Zoey... it was some MAJOR news. I had no idea about any of that. I mean a little heads up would have been great, Zo!" he accused.

"It's not my fault that you're so thick-headed Jake! I mean everyone else in this entire world knew about my feelings for you except for you of course and I swear I didn't give anyone 'a little heads up'" I accused back.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

"See you have such a thick head. Why do you think Rick and Mel aren't going nuts about the whole not-talking thing? They know what I feel for you Jake" I said as I pushed him a little bit.

"Wait... they knew about everything all this time?" he asked looking like a lost puppy.

He looked so cute. I wanted to go hug him right then and there, but I didn't. I have to control my feelings. He was quiet for a while, and every passing second was testing my patience.

"Look, Jake. I know it was a lot to handle and I have nothing to say to it. I'm not even sorry about it."

I wasn't looking his way, but I could feel his wide eyes looking at me incredulously. "I can't believe this chick" that's probably what his head was yelling at the moment, but I really couldn't get myself to care about him. This was about fixing stuff, for me.

"Granted, there could've been less of cursing" he snorted at that remark. He knew how I could get when my temper took over me. "Shut up Jake. I'm talking now" I reminded him.

He pretended to zip his mouth shut and granted me my wish.

"Whatever it was, it got a huge load off me. I mean you know I can't keep anything from you. What haven't I told you? I share everything with you and you can't even begin to imagine what it was like to have this thing haunting me for the past years"

"Years?" he yelled.

"Shut up!" I yelled back. Man, if he isn't gonna retaliate my feelings for him; I am not letting him tease me about it.

He did what I ordered him to do. Ordering... huh... who knew that could be my thing?

I laughed out loud at that thought. Jake stared at me like I was crazy, but he doesn't love me so I don't care what he's thinking about me. Great now, I'm joking about this shit! Fuck it!

I cleared my throat and was about to continue my long speech but I realized I forgot the rest of the bit that I had prepared the whole way to here, wherever it was.

What was I about to say? So not the time to forget things Zoey! I rambled in my head to utter some fixture of English words, I turned out blank!

"I know it must have been difficult for you Zoey, I understand. But..." he rubbed his neck with his free hand while rubbing soothing circles at the back of my hand with his thumb.

Suddenly I knew what I had to say.

"I don't want you to understand my pain Jake, because now there's none of it left. All I want is you stop ignoring me, we being friends like we used to be. When we were four harmless teenagers, trying to get through oh-so-difficult high school." I tried teasing.

"You got it but are you sure you're okay with this?" he asked.

I knew I wasn't okay about this just that minute but I'd be if I have my friends with me right? I faked a huge smile and replied a cheery "positive"

I don't know if Jake caught my fake smile, but he gave me the smallest of nod and started tuning me out. I would have worried about that, but I found myself getting lost in my thoughts as well.

Will I really be able to handle just being a friend to Jake? Was that even physically, mentally and emotionally possible for me?

If I were asking those questions to myself a week ago, I'd have a simple and straight to point answer "no, it's not possible" but right now the answers were gibberish. I had to consider my every option.
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Better now? or is it even worse than before? but I would like to remind you I fulfilled my promise of posting this chapter sooner... and that I'm planning to finish this story in about 3-4 chapters! a little sad about it but I promise it will be a happy ending!

You know what makes me happy! comments are love! and do wait for the next chapter!