What Their Break Up May Say About Your Relationship

Breaking up is hard to do. So goes the old song. It's understandable. Maybe the previous relationship was filled with way too many ups and downs. That can get old but even still the other person touches you in such a way that you feel alive.

Your current dating partner may have gone through a similar experience. So it's no surprise that during one of your get together the subject of old flames becomes the topic of conversation. No big deal as far as you are concerned. Your date may feel the same way but paying attention to their answer and body language may tell you a lot about them and the future of the relationship.

1. They were the lowest form of…

When your date talks about their ex it is a mixture of three parts venom and four parts disgust. It makes sense if their ex behaved in an extreme manner. However if it strikes you as nothing out of the ordinary, then you might want to take a step back. Trashing your ex is not a good idea to begin with but particularly when the rage is out of proportion to the actual reality.

2. What Business Is It Of Yours?

They can say it with a smile or just refuse to answer the question yet the bottom line is still the same: this is territory where you are not invited. Your dating partner may not be ready to talk about their ex. Down the line that may change if the two of you continue the relationship. If you are okay with that so be it. Still take heed to your instincts. Your date being so guarded about a relationship that is no more (supposedly) should put you on guard.

3. Just One Of Those Things

This answer may be a little to casual for your taste. It also is quite ambiguous especially if there is not a whole lot of detail to go with it. What does "just one of those things" mean? They both came to a mutual agreement that the relationship was not working; followed by a harmonious break up? Or there's a court order barring both parties from being in the same state at the same time? If you were not curious before, this answer will more than likely change that.

4. They Did Nothing Wrong

They go on and on about how wonderful their ex was. In fact the break up was solely the fault of your dating partner. You may admire their ability to shoulder the blame but putting their ex on a pedestal where they can do no wrong is not healthy. It may also be a warning signal that the minute their ex snaps their fingers, your dating partner will go running back to them without a second thought about you.

5. A Fair Assessment

Your dating partner is candid about their feelings toward their ex but grounded enough to know the failure of the relationship lies with both parties. What's done is done as far as they are concerned. It's obvious they have nothing to hide and talking about it does not make them uncomfortable. In fact it's almost like therapy. They respect the fact that you asked and it makes them feel a little better about the current relationship.

Talking about the ex can be a major stumbling block with a dating relationship. But it should not be. Wanting to know more about your dating partner's previous relationship is all part of the game; just as long as you can let it go at some point. But paying attention to how they answer the question about their ex can determine the difference between getting closer as a couple or becoming their new ex.

Article written by Daryl Campbell at The Relationship Tip. What happens after the breakup can determine the future of the current relationship.