Two Hearts One Song Chapter 8 Part 3 of 3

I got home later completely worn out, on the verge of collapsing. My body was weary and my mind weak. Everything after my talk with Riley was a blur. I don't know exactly when I left or who picked me up. All I know is, I was in a car with a guy that wasn't Riley. I climbed the stairs to my bedroom, slowly. Every part of my body felt heavy, so slow was my only pace. I opened the door to my room, closing it with my back once I was in. I dropped my bag to the floor, kicked off my shoes, and climbed into my bed, iPod clenched in my fist.

On days like these I needed music, but not just any music, The Knowledge of Truth(T.K.T) music. I scrolled through my iPod until I found their name, hitting play automatically. I laid back on my pillow, staring up at the ceiling as the first song came on. I focused hard on the song as it played into my head. 'Catastrophe' one of my favorite T.K.T songs. It's all about the end. The end of the world, life, a relationship, or just the end.

'Too late to say goodbye, Too late to change things now
The storm is coming in, no chance to make amends
A catastrophe, that's what we were
A catastrophe, that's the end we see'

I sing along with the song, mumbling the words under my breath, knowing how true it is. I've been in a catastrophe for years now and it just keeps getting worse and worse. First it's the disaster that was Josh and my relationship, the catastrophic death of my mother, and the mother of all catastrophes I'm sure is yet to come, but is well on it's merry way.

There's a light rap at my door, surprised I could hear anything, I turn my head just as it opens and Michael enters. "Hey, can I come in?" he asked already closing the door behind him. I shrug and go back to staring at the ceiling, removing one earphone, so I could hear him better. He walks across the room and sits down on the edge of my bed, facing me. I glance over at him and he is watching me, concerned written all over his face. I look away and prepare myself for his questions I knew were coming. I hear him take a deep breath and sigh and I knew he was about to start.

"So, what's up?" he asked. I shrugged.

"Nothing much." I said in a monotone.

"It doesn't sound like nothing." he said in full-on mom mode now. It was funny to think that my athletic, girl-crazed brother was actually the mother in this family now. I never even thought he was the fathering type, let alone mothering. But here we were, here he was, playing the hand he'd been dealt and well.

"Well, it is nothing." I said looking over at him. He sighed again.

"Hail, you haven't been yourself lately, I'm just worried." I rolled my eyes and sat up.

"Didn't we already have this conversation?" I said hitting pause on my iPod.

"Yes, but you never told me why. What's wrong Hailey, you can tell me." I shook my head and brought my knees to my chest.

"No, I can't. You wouldn't understand."

"Try me." he said, but I couldn't. I couldn't tell Michael what I told Riley. Crazy, right? I can be so honest with Riley, but I can't be the least bit truthful with Michael, my own flesh and blood. But he was here, concerned, I should at least tell him something, I thought. I took a deep breath and told him the one thing I could.

"Riley likes me." I said burying my head in my knees.

"Okay..." he said drawing it out. I look up and find him smiling, looking relieved. "Boy trouble. And here I was thinking it was something worse." He had no clue how true that was. It was something worse, has been for a long time. Michael started laughing and I blushed, regretting ever saying anything.

"It's not funny." I said hitting him with my pillow.

"You're right. It's not." he said taking the pillow from me. "Do you like him?" he asked. I shrugged.

"I don't know." I said, which was true. I didn't know how I felt about Riley at the moment. Until yesterday, he had just been a friend, my best friend, my closest friend. Now he liked me and I had to find someway to make it stop. I didn't want to lose Riley, but if he was going to like me and screw things up, I would ultimately have to cut him loose.

Michael laughed again and I shot him a look. "Will you stop laughing." I said, pocking him with the tip of my toe.

"Sorry, but I never thought I'd be sitting here, listening to my baby sister's boy problems."

"It's not like I wanted to tell you, you asked." I said. He nodded.

"True, but you could have just kept denying."

"Yeah, and you would have kept on prying." He nodded again.

"Again, true." he said. "So how do you know he likes you?" I sighed and buried my head back in my knees.

"He told me..." I said muffled. "Today." I finished.

"You like him." Michael said suddenly. I shot my head up and looked at him incredulous.

"I do not. We're just friends." Michael shook his head.

"Nope, you definitely like him. Wanna know why?"

"Please, enlighten me." I said.

"If you didn't like him, you wouldn't be this worried about it." I rolled my eyes at his silly logic.

"I'm not worried because I 'like' him. I'm worried because this could ruin our friendship." I said.

"That's just what you want to believe." he said laying my pillow back down on the end of the bed. I get ready to say something, but Michael stops me. "I might be wrong, you never know." he said standing up.

"Anyway, you look like you could use a pick-me-up, what do you say to a brother, sister dinner and a movie?" he said smiling down at me, reminding me of how, just a few days ago, Riley had said some of those same words to me. How then I should have seen he wanted to be more than friends.

"No thanks." I said stretching my legs out.

"Oh c'mon, Hails. We never do anything together. Let's try something new, like being friends." he said sticking his hand out. "Pwease, for me." He batted his insanely long eyelashes and pouted his bottom lip, giving me the puppy dog face. I had only ever seen him use it once, masterfully on our mother when he wanted to go on an over night trip with his high school sweetheart, Caroline. It was one subject my mother had been firm on for weeks. Every time he asked she said no, our father backing her up, but then one day he used The Face.

"You, brought this on yourself, mom." he said as we sat in the kitchen one morning. My mother rolled her eyes, but as soon as she saw that face, you could see her walls crumbling. "Can I go, pwease mom." Her mouth fell open and before we knew it, she was saying yes. It was amazing what mischief my brother's good looks plus that face could do. Just one bat of his eyelashes, a pout of his lips, and one pwease was all he needed to get what he wanted.

So now here I was, facing the same face my mother had those years ago. Like her, I was crumbling, on the brink of agreeing. I reached out my hand, taking Michael's, which was all the agreement he needed. He had gotten me, a lot quicker than he had our mother, but I wasn't used to The Face and hadn't built up any immunity. I grabbed my shoes and slipped them on before following Michael down the stairs.

"Isn't this a violation of my sentence?" I said as we entered the kitchen.

"Nope. Dad never said you couldn't hangout with me, did he?" He had a point. Dad never said I couldn't go out with Michael, but I never really thought that was an option. Sure, Michael and I are closer than we used to be, but not that close. The only time we've hung out are at home or school drivings, nothing more. So going to dinner and a movie with him was something very new, to both of us.

"No, I guess he didn't, but won't he wonder where we are?" I asked as I climbed into the passenger seat of his Toyota.

"Got it covered." he said finishing up a text I assumed to our father. He slid his phone into his shirt pocket and revved up the engine. "Off to the mall we go."

We pulled into the parking lot just in front of The Olive Garden, cars already filling in almost every space. Across the street was the mall and movie theater, which was just as full as this side. Michael cut off the engine and looked at his watch. "I guess it's a little early for dinner, how about we hit the mall for awhile." he said turning to me.

"If we were going to do that, maybe you should have parked, I don't know, over there." I said pointing at the mall.

"You're right. I should've." he said smiling, turning the key in the ignition. "Guess we'll just have to move." After another ten minutes spent circling the parking lot across the street, we finally find a space and hit the mall.

It had been a long time since I'd been in a mall. Two years almost, but nothings changed. Maybe there were a few new stores and some old ones missing, but everything was pretty much as I remembered. The smell a different foods, coffee, and department store perfume filled the air. People rushing past each other in hurdles, going from store to store. Kids in the arcade and crowding the food court. Girls my age packed in shops, like Victoria Secrets, Hot Topic, Forever 21, Kohl's, and Old Navy, trying on everything they could find. Guys checking them out from Footlocker, the arcade and Game Stop, just waiting for them to come out.

We walked past a Star Bucks and like always the smell of coffee tempted me. It had been so long, yet I was still enticed by the smell, ready to spend Michael's money on a large latte. I closed my eyes and sucked in the aroma one more time before moving on. I followed behind Michael as he entered what had to be my second favorite store in the world; Holland's Music House being my first. You could never go wrong with Best Buy. It had movies, games, and my personal favorite thing, CDs. I don't know how I've managed these last years without coming here. I guess shopping was really in my mind. There had to be at least a hundred new CDs by artist I love out by now.

Michael spins around to me, smiling. "Okay, pick out any three CDs or movies or games you want, I'm buying." he said. I looked at him astounded, not sure if he was joking or not.

"Are you serious?" I asked. He nodded.

"Yes, very serious. I haven't seen you bring home a new CD since..." he paused and thought a moment, his face falling, configuring it's self into a grim expression. "Since that day we found you in the hospital." I winced as he brought one of the things I had just relived earlier today, bringing back my whole conversation with Riley. I shut my eyes and try to push it to the back of my head, like I did so much else, wanting to stop it before it took me over even more.

"Hey, you okay?" Michael asked as he brushed his hand up and down my arm. I nodded slowly, opening my eyes back up.

"Any three CDs, huh?" I said. Michael smiled and nodded.

"Any three."

Michael and I got home later that night, me with a bellyful of garlic bread and Chicken Alfredo, a cheesy grin from having seen the new Comedy movie out, about some kids kicking zombie butt, and three new CDs. It had been hard to decide which ones I wanted, considering there were so many to choose from. I mean, there was Green Day, Coldplay, Kings of Leon, Shinedown, and so many more. I found myself going back and forth between so many CDs, wishing I could just buy them all. But when I suggested that to Michael, he just laughed in my face. In the end I ended up picking the newest release from Paramore, Kings of Leon, and Until June.

I tossed my bag of goodies onto my bed, kicking off my shoes and sliding on after them. I reached over, picking up my CD player from the nightstand and inserted the first CD. As soon as the first guitar riff started, I was sent into another world. Someplace I hadn't been in a very, very long time. Someplace clear, where everything started to piece itself together.

"Wow," Riley said as he plopped down next to me, underneath Benny, returning to our afternoon routine. "I haven't seen one of those in a long time." he said pointing to my CD player, which I had opted to bring today, instead of my iPod.

"Ah, yes, it is the age of the MP3, but sometimes, you just have to take it back." I said, running my finger around the edge of the machine. All day, Riley and I had managed to act as if things weren't awkward, which they were. Earlier I had planned on dodging again, but when he cornered me at my locker, I had no choice but to suck it up and act 'normal'. For the most part, Riley was the one keeping things in balance, filling in awkward silences when they arose, talking about everything but yesterday and the days prior, cracking jokes on the pop listening, social climbers whenever we met in the hall, and now commenting on my use of a portable CD player.

I was doing my best to keep up with him, but every time looked at him, his deep blue eyes always on me, I couldn't help but to think of yesterday and what he said and what I would have to do sooner rather than later. This morning, even before leaving, I knew the eve of my greatest catastrophe was upon us. Or at least me and the people involved. My world in linked with theirs was about to experience a major storm. High winds blowing in from every direction. Rain, snow, sleet, and hail coming down everywhere. Twisters, monsoons, tsunamis, and hurricanes all rolling in to make one beautiful disaster.

It was weird to think something so devastating could be beautiful. That anything world shattering was something to marvel at, to want. It was funny, really. Calling the end of life as we knew it beautiful. Anything that could cause possible harm, heartbreak, and pain, wasn't beautiful to say the least. It was something to be feared. Something people should never want to see happen or have happen. A beautiful disaster was just not possible.

Riley nodded his head, still looking at the machine in my hands. "So, what are you listening to?" he asked.

"Coldplay." I said nonchalantly. He nodded again and with it came an awkward silence. The air stale and distant, despite our closeness. And even with the music playing in my ears, I could still hear the overwhelming silence that circled us.

I looked up at Riley and like so many other times today, caught him staring at me. His eyes always soft, but worried, a wry smile sitting on the corners of his mouth, no sign of the Riley I once knew or thought I knew present. I watched as the little sparkle in his eyes quivered, like it was dancing. That wavy look most people called, teary-eyed, something I doubted Riley was. He just had dancing sparklers, that saw deep inside you, when you wished they wouldn't, that went right through every wall you put up. Hopped over every fence you built. Blew down your house even though it's made of brick. Riley had those eyes, the ones you found yourself getting lost in, despite your mind of reason.

An algid fall wind blew across the field, knocking more of Benny's leaves to the ground, as well as kicking up a few. The song playing ended and the immensely growing silence became more apparent. I was still staring at Riley, trapped in his gazed, that stared back at me. Our awkward moment only seeming to grow as each of us sat there and did nothing. I was fighting with my stomach, trying to kill the butterflies that wanted to flap their wings. This was no time for nerves, nor was it time for getting lost in those dancing sparklers. I forcefully blinked my eyes and turned away from Riley. That beautiful disaster was well on it's way. Hopefully, this was my last catastrophe.

Riley cleared his throat, just as the tenth period bell rung, notifying us that it was time to go inside. I stopped my CD and cut of the player and shoved it back into my bag with the rest of my lunch. I stood up, lingering awhile as Riley stood himself. We were still surrounded by precarious air, so this made leaving that much harder. I couldn't just walk away, though I was seriously considering the option. But I didn't really want to walk back together, especially not with this weird air following us. There was only one thing left to do: say a quick see ya and high tail it down the road.

I opened my mouth to speak, but Riley was already moving past me, not making any eye contact or attempt at a goodbye. I watched as he took long strides away, making the gap between us bigger and bigger, not that it needed help. I should have took this gesture as my out. He was giving me the space I needed to cut him out of my world. So why did it bother me so much? I had planned on doing this myself, but I never thought he'd let me. I didn't even get the chance to explain or say goodbye. I couldn't let in that way. I couldn't take that easy way out. I needed to say my piece and be done with it. Maybe on some sick, twisted level, I did want to marvel at that beautiful disaster.

I waited for Riley to come out of the school, knowing Michael would be late, giving me some time to talk with him. I wanted to end things my way, not his, so I waited and waited and waited. After about half the parking lot cleared, leaving the after school kids cars, I realized something was up. Usually Riley would have walked out by now and would be in his car, digging through his mess of a back seat, looking for some CD. I looked over into the parking lot, his car was still there, untouched. Then it hit. It was Wednesday and most of the sports teams and such met on Wednesday. Riley had joined the basketball team, so there was only one logical place he could be.

I pushed my bag up my shoulder and headed back into the building. The soles of my shoes squeaked as I walked down the empty hall. I looked into a few classrooms, watching as the last of the teachers packed up and got ready to leave. Stacks of books and papers, not to mention the three or four bags they all seemed to carry, crammed in either hand and arm. I slowly turned the corner headed for the gym. The sound of squeaking shoes, cheers, and shouts growing with every step I took. I made it a point from the beginning to never set foot down on this end of the school. I had my P.E credits, so I didn't need to nor want to. I stayed away from the populars and they left me alone. Coming down here meant stepping into their territory, meaning all bets were off and I was a target.

I stood in front of the gym door, watching as the basketball team did sprints up and down the court, the cheerleading squad in there sweats go through some routine, chanting loudly. I turned back to the team and spotted Riley in knee long black shorts, a gray, sleeveless t-shirt, already stained with sweat, and what looked like new white sneakers. His hair had fallen flat and was no longer standing like it did every other time I saw him. His face was serious and focused, he looked so... normal. More and more Riley shocked me. I would have never thought he would put so much into this. After all he was roped into it, but watching him now, I would say he was enjoying it. A whistle was blown and the team one by one started to slow, eventually stopping. They were breathing hard, but still looked like they could do more.

"Looking good, Grey!" a man in sweatpants and t-shirt yelled. I assumed he was the coach. Riley nodded, smiling slightly, sending another wave of shock rolling through me. He was enjoying it. "Five minute break!" the coached yelled and the guys each grabbed a towel from the bench. I watched as a few guys came up to Riley, talking and patting him on the back. A short, stocky, blond haired guy must have said something funny, because he and Riley both burst into laughter. I couldn't take it any longer, I didn't want to see someone I obviously didn't know anymore. I turned around and I began to walk away when,

"Hailey?" It was loud and shocked and definitely all Riley. I turned back to see him coming towards me, all eyes facing my direction. I immediately go into shrink mode, trying to hide myself just behind the door. "What are you doing here?" Riley asked once he was closer to me. The reason I came didn't seem sufficient anymore, like it didn't even matter, like coming here had just been another mistake on my part. I stared at Riley, his sweat stained t-shirt and all and sighed. Might as well get it over with, I thought, crossing my arms.

"We need to talk." I said in a low voice. Riley looked at me then back in the gym, where everyone was still watching.

"Now is not a good time," he said, watching as the guys started to line up again. "I'm kinda in the middle of something." I nodded.

"I know, but..." A whistle is blown again and Riley starts backing up from me. I needed to get this over with, I couldn't bear another day like this one. Just as I got ready to go on someone comes rushing past me, pausing just behind Riley. Josh, in all his practice gear spun around, making a detour back to Riley and me.

"Hey, I know you're new and all, but no sluts are allowed at practice. Okay, freak." Josh said to Riley patting him on the back, turning back into the gym and that's when I saw it. If I hadn't been watching him, I probably would have never noticed The Change. The split second in time when people go from just-fine to about-to-kill. I had seen it so many times with Josh, that I knew when it happens you better move. I coiled back as Riley whipped around, grabbing Josh by his shirt.

"What did you just call her?" he said, teeth clenched, brow furrowed, and on the verge of ripping a hole in Josh's shirt, oblivious to the fact he had been called freak. You could see the fear as it shot into Josh's eyes, but that too only lasted a second. He was then back to his old, shit-talking self. He grabbed Riley's fist and tried to loosen it from his shirt, but not successful in the least.

"What did you call her?" Riley asked again. Josh smiled and said, "A slut. What, you can't hear? She's a slut. Always have been. Always will be."

I didn't see it coming and obviously, Josh didn't either. The way Riley's hand crashed into, Josh's face was insane. It looked just like those boxing games the guys played. Josh's jaw went from the left side of his face to the right. His lips going the opposite direction, blood spouting out. Riley releases his shirt and delivered a heinous body blow.

They just kept coming, one after the other. Left, right, uppercut, jab, straight shot into the nose. Josh wasn't getting one lick in. I thought I'd never see the day, Josh couldn't hold his own, that monster that used to cause me so much harm was now defenseless. For a moment my hearing had gone and everything just seemed so surreal. It was like I was in a movie, watching two guys beat the snot out of each other in soundless slow-mo. Suddenly I became aware of everything. The whistle blowing loudly, the yelling, the screaming, and the basketball team running towards us.

Riley and Josh fall to the gym floor, where Riley continues to beat Josh, more blood spewing everywhere. Josh started pulling at Riley's shirt, ripping it, exposing the long scar he'd showed me only a week or so ago. That's when it all came rushing back to me, the story of how he had gotten it. The day long ago in his past where he just snapped, nearly killing himself and the guy he had been fighting. I then looked at Riley, shaking my head, covering my open mouth. I don't know what had gotten into me, but I was now running into the gym, diving down to stop them. Next thing I know I'm screaming and stupidly putting my arm over Josh's bleeding head, causing Riley to hit it. I cry out in pain, which stopped Riley completely.

I rolled away from Josh, gripping tightly to my arm, tears welling up in my eyes. Riley hopped off of Josh, who was more than incapacitated, more like knocked out and scrambled his way over to me. "Shit." he whispered as he peered down at me. He reaches out to look at my arm and instinctively I flinch away, doing exactly what I used to do with Josh. Instantly I regret doing it, watching as his face dropped.

"I'm sorry." he whispered. "I'm so sorry." Suddenly Riley was being pulled up and away from me. I don't know when or how, but somehow Riley's father had been notified and was now pulling him out of the gym room. I quickly got to my feet and ran after them or at least tried, before I was stopped by the rest of the team and cheerleading squad. A short, blond girl kept grabbing at my arm, asking if it hurt, which it did, but I needed to get out of there and find Riley. He needed to know I didn't mean to flinch, it just sort of happened. The other girls crowded around, talking, some crying, one or two on the phone.

"I knew they shouldn't have let that freak in this school. Now look what he's done." said some girl behind me. I turned around, my arm still in the blond girl's grasp, to face some of the same girls I had seen laughing at me yesterday. Now they stood there in their sweats, hair pulled back, arms crossed, judging Riley. They don't even know him, I thought, before screaming,

"He's not a freak!" I ripped my arm away from the girl who was examining it, causing more pain to myself. Startled they stared up at me, narrowing their eyes, I did the same. "He's the greatest guy I know." I said turning around and walking out.

"She's a freak too." the girl said as I left. Once outside I pulled out my phone, running around like a chicken with it's head cut off, searching for Riley. His car was there, still in the parking lot, but he was nowhere to be found. I dial his number, no answer. I leave a message telling him to call me. It had finally happened, my grand catastrophe. And just like a storm, it started out of a perfectly calm moment, escalating into a full out disaster. There was no real warning of when it was coming, but somehow you just knew. It was your classic achy knee syndrome. Now all that was let was the aftermath.

I walked into school the next day, sleepy. I had stayed up half the night calling and texting, Riley until I couldn't. I had filled up both his voicemail and inbox. Now all I could do was call and hoped he answered. I walked down the hall, everyone staring at me more than usual. I was getting more sideway glances, narrowed eyes, and less than low whispers. Clearly word had gotten around about yesterday and I, of course was the main target with Riley absent.

His car had, luckily been moved out of the parking lot when I got in earlier. Maybe he came and got it, I thought as continued down the hall to my locker. There was no telling what these people would have done to if it was still there. I opened my locker, phone pressed to my ear, still trying to reach Riley. Again I got his voicemail, hanging up just as a woman's voice said the mailbox was full. I sighed and leaned deeper into my locker, just as two girls came up to theirs.

"... Lost that much blood?!" one girl said in a low shocked voice. "Oh my gosh, that's horrible."

"Yeah, and then that girl," said the other girl, "she was defending him." I sat up a little and peered at them through the crack of my locker door. One girl had her back to me, so all I could see was her long, brown hair as she spoke. The other girl had glasses and wavy, black hair pulled into a high pony, shaking her head disapprovingly.

"But isn't she like his girlfriend?" she said now to the brown haired girl, who nodded and snapped her fingers.

"Yeah, I think she is." she said. It amazed me how people just assumed that because Riley and I hang out together, that we're a couple. Did they ever stop to think that maybe we were just friends. Is it a crime to have a male friend that's not a boyfriend?

I slammed my locker shut, making my presence known. They both jumped slightly and I bumped them both with my shoulder for talking bad about people they obviously don't know.

By the end of the day I was even more wiped out than I was when I got here. I did nothing but listen to people talk about Josh in all my classes. People saying how bad they felt for him, not knowing he was the real monster, not Riley. And every time Riley did come up, I was the one person everyone wanted to stare at. Fifth period I was asked to the office to give my official statement on what happened. That only lasted about ten minutes. I wasn't giving them anything to use against Riley. Sure, he did through the first, second, third, fourth, fifth, every punch, but Josh deserved them all. During lunch I sat under Benny and called Riley over and over. He still wasn't answering, which seemed to be the pattern for the rest of the week.

Friday hit and people were still talking about the Gym Incident, as it is now being called. I was still the center of everyone's whispers and apparently mailing list. I don't know how many hateful letters I've received in my locker, all anonymous senders. They all basically said the same thing, like: We're watching. Get out of our school, freak. You and you boyfriend better watch out. and Bitch! After the first few I didn't bother reading them anymore. Now I just knocked them out of my locker, onto the floor. I walked out of the school building, phone clasped to my ear, calling Riley again. It rang a few times and just as I was about to hang up, someone clicked on.

"Riley? Riley? Are you there? Are you okay? I'm–" I started to ramble, my breath catching in my throat as he cut me off.

"I have to tell you something." he said in a low, tired voice. I waited and he continued. "I'm... I'm going back to boarding school."
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I hope you all enjoyed Josh getting his butt kicked. I know I did. I think it's one of the best fights scenes I've ever written. And don't you just love cliffhangers.