Thirty Days of Sunshine

At times you simply fail to understand what all is happening in your life. Days and months pass by without a leaf flying and then there's a sudden phase of activities that just go on taking place one after the other. I shall never forget July 2011, a precious phase of my life.

I often cried to sleep just because I felt I was alone and something was missing, though I was surrounded by a lot of people. Days used to pass just filled with work, worries and responsibilities. I felt as if I had lost the real "Neha" somewhere. Never did I use to pray regularly or sit quietly on a busy evening. But, there came July to make me meet the real "me" inside. I started working. The place where I worked was as good as a dream come true for me. The job nourished my creativity to the fullest. That was when I got to know that one of the purposes of my living was to write... write passionately... from the bottom of my heart. I could write endlessly on any given topic. I shouldn't forget to tell you that the moment I used to indulge myself in writing, the world was a beautiful place to reside in. I never thought of the work at home or about the worries that used to give me sleepless nights before. I wouldn't be exaggerating myself if I say that the experience was divine. It not only contented me to the core but also pasted a curve on my lips 24/7.

Everything was just so good that there were no moments of distress. Along with satisfaction came a thorough learning experience. I was pretty skeptical about being criticized by anyone and now is the time when I can handle it... I can like it and accept it. This, one and a half month old job, taught me to love, care and feel free... even more! I was blessed to have seniors who loved me and friends with whom I eased up within a day or two. Every single day, I used to feel happy and good for no reason! Everything about my workplace, right from checking in, work, lunch time, coffee breaks, checking out and every other aspect of my job for that matter, made me a better person. Accepting people for what they are and the way they came along with it. You may not like some people at your workplace, but, there came a time when I could "accept" things and not "manage" or "handle" things. That's when I started noticing major changes... changes for the good... in me. There was a sudden aura of positivity and joy that used to surround me every time and everywhere.

I cannot express in words how happy (a small word though!) I was to hand over my first salary to my mom. The joy and pride she had in her eyes was beyond explanation. She never spoke it out, but I knew what was running through her mind. The speechless love that my little sister showered upon me, the love that my friends and dear ones gave me was something that can make you fall in love with yourself. I bought gifts for all my close ones and they welcomed them with open arms. July was also a month when I turned a graduate! Ask me how does it feel to be a graduate and pat will come a reply - "Amazing!"... What else would a girl of 21 want? A girl who has a loving family at home, a great job, caring friends and close buddies would wish for nothing else in life. I had the time of my life. Once, there were times of loss which I had to go through. Losses that were and are irreparable today, but I could now hope and practice for the best.

Now that I quit my job for higher studies, I am nostalgic. A college which most of the students would aspire for is waiting to welcome me and a job which every writer would want is holding me. Tough time indeed, but I can take it happily. The respect and love that I gained from here is beyond count. I would try my level best to come back to this place where I met myself and fell in love with my own. There are times that test you and there are times that reward you for the patience and determination you kept throughout. This is the time when I don't really "walk out", but "walk in" the world of greater dreams, opportunities and rewards. Though I won't really be here physically, my writing shall always 'Buzzle' in the minds of my buddies! As I do every time, even now I feel contented after penning down my thoughts. One last thought that I want to share is, I am surely going to miss my work, my company, my friends and my salary(!), but I am happy to fly out with a sense of independence and delight!

With lots of love and warmth...