Why is there an excessive concern over this hymen thing? You would hear this among the hushes of girl talks, the closed-door topics of boys' night outs and warnings of mothers to daughters. It even entered the market of commodities as a traded item in the form of artificial hymen (secondary virginity) for sale. Women of India go to medical institutions to acquire certificates of virginity before matrimony. Tunisia and Japan among others offer priced-packages for hymenoplasty, a surgical hymen reconstruction. Legal cases are filed for the reason of a hymen-absence during the wedding night. Men are even willing to pay expensive amounts in auctions for the "virgin item" herself.
There are three possible reasons -
During the copulation, pain and bleeding are not guarantees of virginity. For technically, there is no reliable way to prove a woman's virginity. As we know, this is a status of inexperience in sexual act of a man and a woman. A broad concept, sexual act nowadays also involves oral, dry or even anal method. Contrary to the old belief, therefore, neither a torn hymen accompanied by pain and bleeding nor an intact one could be considered as conclusive evidence. One could even engage in penetrative sex without tearing the supposedly untouched maidenhead and thus without pain and blood. This is possible since a matured female reproductive organ fully prepared for reproduction is characterized by muscle elasticity. This is nature's way. A torn hymen for those who have a very thin membrane could also have been a result of rigorous if not daily physical activities like sports, bicycling and exercises. In rare cases, others do not even have a hymen. And there are a lot of other possibilities. Furthermore, medical science has shown that the accompanying pain and bleeding could have been a result of ruptured blood vessels & tissues due to lack of preparation, improper positions, anatomical variations of the couple and logically, diseases.
Still, a lot claim of an uncomfortable first encounter, if not painful and bloody. One possible explanation could be the lack of psycho-physical preparation for both. I believe that sexual activity which is primarily intended for reproduction involves physical as well as emotional maturity and preparedness. The peak of reproductive organs growth is the later period of adolescent stage. Emotional maturity however tends to come in late. Albeit physically ready, fears and anxiety e.g. the anxiety to please the partner, fear of possible pregnancy or being caught in the act, fear of the anticipated pain sensationalized by the mothers or just the nervousness of having the first time are manifestations of ill-preparedness of the psychological aspect. Physiological reactions of muscle contraction, tightness and others will be present which will then cause the pain.
The hymen as indicator of chastity therefore remains a myth.
Chastity before marriage as a moral choice is a virtue, therefore, morally right. The Biblical paradigm presents the reasons for chastity as a form of protection against possible sufferings from consequences e.g. STD, unwed motherhood which has a great impact on the child's and mother's well-being and emotional hurts due to lack of preparations. It also asserts God's omniscience on this matter so He knows what is good for His creations. It involves the man and the woman to be chaste thus, virgin.
It shuns all recognized forms of deliberate sexual acts. I pointed it as a conscious choice since it does not in any way involve the hymen. To be violated sexually is not a choice.
The present global society however misinterprets chastity as limited within the boundary of its female members. There is a claim even among educators and authorities that men by nature are polygamous. So the society should be forgiving if they decide from time to time to venture out of the marriage bond as long as they do not neglect family responsibilities, as if fidelity is not. This is a clear assertion of male dominance of claiming to know what is supposed to be morally right in familial relationships. This crisis led to the rise of feminism which however created other issues. One of its possible strayed influences, intentional or not is the desire for absolute equality of rights. If the husband is womanizing, the wives also could go playing as no longer "hymen-bounded" without the fear of being stigmatized. This is a foreboding revolt of the hymen.
While agreeing with Azurin's assertion that the hymen is a deep domain of male dominance, I believe that it may need further studies to conclude that it is the deepest domain. Generally, however, I could say that sexuality is the deepest. Notice on how women undergo expensive cosmetic surgeries, liposuction, face lifting etc., while spending thousands for sexy clothes, jewelry, perfumes and cosmetics. Some even suffer anorexia nervosa. And as mentioned earlier, hymenoplasty is becoming a trend. These preoccupations are primarily intended for the women to remain sexually attractive to please their mates or potential mates; thus, advertently or inadvertently allowing men's control over their consciousness or psyche. In Filipino language, the word 'sexy' itself, which means "sexually pleasing, arousing or attractive" though being used by females also, is a "male" word intended for the women. Sexual favor could also be a source of emotional blackmail used by males to manipulate women such that surrendering oneself becomes a proof of loyalty and love. Some men's challenging words are "Surrender to me the proof of your love."
The hymen myth as a possible recognized discourse is not meant to be prejudicial. The aspiration is to integrate and further understand women experiences as interrelated with men's. This is to help address the present societal crisis of broken families, teenage pregnancy, machismo and masochism, unwed or single motherhood, pornography and women abuse among others which might be interconnected with the hymen obsession.
References: Azurin, Arnold M. (1993). Reinventing the Filipino. CSSP Publications.
Blank Hanne (2007). Virgin: The untouched history. New York: Bloomsbury USA.
There are three possible reasons -
- Presence of a deep-rooted ignorance;
- Misinterpretation and misrepresentation of the virtue of chastity and;
- Prevailing male dominance.
During the copulation, pain and bleeding are not guarantees of virginity. For technically, there is no reliable way to prove a woman's virginity. As we know, this is a status of inexperience in sexual act of a man and a woman. A broad concept, sexual act nowadays also involves oral, dry or even anal method. Contrary to the old belief, therefore, neither a torn hymen accompanied by pain and bleeding nor an intact one could be considered as conclusive evidence. One could even engage in penetrative sex without tearing the supposedly untouched maidenhead and thus without pain and blood. This is possible since a matured female reproductive organ fully prepared for reproduction is characterized by muscle elasticity. This is nature's way. A torn hymen for those who have a very thin membrane could also have been a result of rigorous if not daily physical activities like sports, bicycling and exercises. In rare cases, others do not even have a hymen. And there are a lot of other possibilities. Furthermore, medical science has shown that the accompanying pain and bleeding could have been a result of ruptured blood vessels & tissues due to lack of preparation, improper positions, anatomical variations of the couple and logically, diseases.
Still, a lot claim of an uncomfortable first encounter, if not painful and bloody. One possible explanation could be the lack of psycho-physical preparation for both. I believe that sexual activity which is primarily intended for reproduction involves physical as well as emotional maturity and preparedness. The peak of reproductive organs growth is the later period of adolescent stage. Emotional maturity however tends to come in late. Albeit physically ready, fears and anxiety e.g. the anxiety to please the partner, fear of possible pregnancy or being caught in the act, fear of the anticipated pain sensationalized by the mothers or just the nervousness of having the first time are manifestations of ill-preparedness of the psychological aspect. Physiological reactions of muscle contraction, tightness and others will be present which will then cause the pain.
The hymen as indicator of chastity therefore remains a myth.
Chastity before marriage as a moral choice is a virtue, therefore, morally right. The Biblical paradigm presents the reasons for chastity as a form of protection against possible sufferings from consequences e.g. STD, unwed motherhood which has a great impact on the child's and mother's well-being and emotional hurts due to lack of preparations. It also asserts God's omniscience on this matter so He knows what is good for His creations. It involves the man and the woman to be chaste thus, virgin.
It shuns all recognized forms of deliberate sexual acts. I pointed it as a conscious choice since it does not in any way involve the hymen. To be violated sexually is not a choice.
The present global society however misinterprets chastity as limited within the boundary of its female members. There is a claim even among educators and authorities that men by nature are polygamous. So the society should be forgiving if they decide from time to time to venture out of the marriage bond as long as they do not neglect family responsibilities, as if fidelity is not. This is a clear assertion of male dominance of claiming to know what is supposed to be morally right in familial relationships. This crisis led to the rise of feminism which however created other issues. One of its possible strayed influences, intentional or not is the desire for absolute equality of rights. If the husband is womanizing, the wives also could go playing as no longer "hymen-bounded" without the fear of being stigmatized. This is a foreboding revolt of the hymen.
While agreeing with Azurin's assertion that the hymen is a deep domain of male dominance, I believe that it may need further studies to conclude that it is the deepest domain. Generally, however, I could say that sexuality is the deepest. Notice on how women undergo expensive cosmetic surgeries, liposuction, face lifting etc., while spending thousands for sexy clothes, jewelry, perfumes and cosmetics. Some even suffer anorexia nervosa. And as mentioned earlier, hymenoplasty is becoming a trend. These preoccupations are primarily intended for the women to remain sexually attractive to please their mates or potential mates; thus, advertently or inadvertently allowing men's control over their consciousness or psyche. In Filipino language, the word 'sexy' itself, which means "sexually pleasing, arousing or attractive" though being used by females also, is a "male" word intended for the women. Sexual favor could also be a source of emotional blackmail used by males to manipulate women such that surrendering oneself becomes a proof of loyalty and love. Some men's challenging words are "Surrender to me the proof of your love."
The hymen myth as a possible recognized discourse is not meant to be prejudicial. The aspiration is to integrate and further understand women experiences as interrelated with men's. This is to help address the present societal crisis of broken families, teenage pregnancy, machismo and masochism, unwed or single motherhood, pornography and women abuse among others which might be interconnected with the hymen obsession.
References: Azurin, Arnold M. (1993). Reinventing the Filipino. CSSP Publications.
Blank Hanne (2007). Virgin: The untouched history. New York: Bloomsbury USA.