The Dark or The Light? (Chapter 5)

Chapter 5.

My mother spent the morning deciding what to wear. I just picked a plain white dress and let my hair hang down. Eventually she decided on a bright red dress that finished just below her knees. She looked stunning, as per usual. When she had finished with her make up we walked downstairs to see everybody waiting for us. Jeremiah and my grandma were in an in depth conversation so I walked over and stood next to Mark.

"You look amazing." He said.
"Um…thanks."
"Oh…shout. I’m sorry if that was you know over stepping that mark."
"Mark. I maybe a little fragile but that doesn’t mean I don’t know how to take a compliment." He blushed a little.
"Well lets get going shall we?" My grandma said.
"Sure."
We all walked out to be greeted by two cars, both with drivers.
"Meg and Isabell you two are coming with me. Jeremiah and Mark can go in the other car does that sound okay to everyone?"
"Sounds splendid." My mother whispered sarcastically.
"What was that dear?"
"Said it sounds great." My mother said. I shook my head. This is going to be a long ride.
Once we were all in we commenced our drive towards the town.
"So tell me about yourself Isabell."
"What would you like to know?"
"Tell about your favorite place to visit."
"Um…well, I don’t know."
"Let me guess. Its Paris, no Rome, no Greece. Wait its Spain isn’t it? You look like a Spain girl. I remember when you grandfather took me on trips to Spain."
"Um…grandma. I have never been out of the state before, let alone the country." I looked over to my mother who was staring out the window. I could see her reflection in the mirror and her eyes looked pained.
"Oh, well. We shall have to change that one-day. A young girl like you should be seeing the world. Do things while your young. I mean you should have done it a lot earlier but there is still time."
"Sorry, mom! Sorry I couldn’t afford to take her around the world," My mother said. She was pissed now.
"Sweetie that’s not what I-"
"Oh and Sorry I had to pay the bills! Sorry I had to look after her instead of taking her on world-class trips! I was kind of busy surviving!" My mother screamed. Something told me this wasn’t really about the trip.
"We tried to get you to come back didn’t we?! We even sent you money! You were the one who sent it back!"
"Because I didn’t want to rely on you and dad!"
Suddenly they both erupted into a full on battle. This was to much drama to handle in one car. We were about five minutes from the town and I was starting to get a headache.
"WOULD THE BOTH OF YOU JUST SHUT UP!" I yelled. They both went silent and looked at me. "Do you honestly think yelling at each other is going to get you somewhere? Stop complaining about the past. It has already happened, you can’t change it now so stop trying to justify your actions! You were both wrong and you both made stupid mistakes! Get over it!" I took a long, deep breath. Wow. I didn’t know I had it in me. Suddenly something occurred to me. What’s past is past. I can’t change it. Lucus made that mistake. It wasn't my fault. The car stopped and I realized that we were now in the town. I got out quickly and began to walk. I needed fresh air.

"Isabell hunny? Where are you going?" My mother called.
"I need to go for a walk." I kept on walking when I felt someone beside me. I looked up to see Jeremiah and Mark.
"Hey."
"I just needed to go for a walk."
"I know. I heard. So…How was the car drive?"
"Huh…lets just say it wasn’t very pleasant."
"How so?"
"I realized something." I said changing the subject.
"What’s that?"
"It was his mistake. Right?"
"Right."
"So why does it make me feel like the weight on my chest has been lifted off?" We had stopped now.
"Because your realizing that you had no control over the situation. Yes you were apart of it but you didn’t have control over it. You couldn’t of changed his mind, even if you wanted to. You could have derailed him, bought him time but inevitably he would have done what he did because he didn’t get help."
I paused for a moment.
"Can we change the subject? I really don’t feel like having a session on the street."
"Sure. Are you going to go shopping?"
"No. I don’t really feel like shopping."
"Oh. Well we could always-"
"Jeremiah!" Someone called cutting him off.
"Oh shit." He mumbled.
"Whose that?"
"One of Jeremiah’s groupies." Mark whispered. Jeremiah punched his arm.
"I’ll be back in a second." Jeremiah whispered and then walked over to the lady.
"Poor guy." I said.
"Yeah. With the looks of it, it doesn’t look like he will be coming back any time soon." Mark said. I giggled. It wasn’t drastic or over the top but I giggled. I turned to him and pulled him into the biggest hug imaginable. I pulled back from him with a grin set on my face as well as his.
"What was that for?"
"Because you made me laugh" I said looking into his deep green eyes. They sparkling.
"I’m glad." He whispered. I unconsciously leaned in towards his lips.
"MARK? IS THAT YOU!" I heard some girl squeal. I pulled back immediately. WHAT THE HELL WAS I DOING? I screamed at myself.
"Oh Mary. What great timing you have." He muttered sarcastically. I smiled. Trying to keep myself from laughing.
"I haven’t seen you in like forever." She said throwing herself onto him as well as almost hitting me with her bags. Mark gently pushed her off him. She looked down at me.
"Who’s the trailer trash?" She said pulling Mark towards her. This time he wasn’t gentle with pushing her off.
"This is Isabell Olane and she is far from trailer trash." His ice-cold voice scared me a little.
"Wait Olane? As in Richard and Mayfield Olane?" She’s a slow one.
"Yep. She’s their granddaughter." Her eyes widened in shock.
"Oh My Gosh! I am so sorry. I didn’t mean what I said honestly." She said giving me a fake sad look.
"Wow I knew girls here were fake but you just set the record." I said and with that I walked off. I heard Mark laughing beside me.
"Nice."
"Thanks. You know you didn’t have to defend me. Her comment didn’t hurt."
"I know but I just felt like I…needed to."
"Oh."
"Its not because of what happened to you. Its because I…really, really like you." I stopped in my tracks and looked up at him.
"Mark. I like you to, really but I…can’t. Not yet. I’m not ready yet."
"I know. Its okay Isabell. I’m not going anywhere."

We continued walking until we eventually found my mother and grandmother. They were sitting on a bench talking. I was quite proud actually. My grandmother decided she wanted to buy me some clothes. I said yes not knowing that some actually turned out to be like two hundred! Okay that was an over exaggeration but still it felt like it. Jeremiah just laughed at me every time I was told to go try something on.

"Grandma is this almost over?" I asked trying to disguise my whining.
"Yes my dear just one more shop."

We walked into a shop that was filled with endless amounts of gorgeous gowns. They were all different colors and designs. There were princess type gowns, lacy gowns, and one that had every color of the rainbow.

"Wow." Was all I could say.
"I know aren’t they just beautiful? Now I want you and your mother to pick one."
"What for?"
"Your going to be needing it for the ball we are going to through next week."
"What?!" My mother almost screamed. I just froze. I didn’t want to go to a ball and have to smile and meet snotty nosed people that I will have to make conversation with. I just started to talk to my mother. I wasn’t ready. Fortunately Jeremiah and my mother knew this.
"Mrs. Olane I don’t think that’s such a good idea. I mean Isabell has just started to make progress. I don’t think she will be ready to converse with people yet."
"Jeremiah I am grateful for what you are doing but a ball will be perfect. Wouldn’t you like a welcoming ball Isabell." Everyone turned to me. I was silent for a minute.
"No. No I don’t want to go. I can’t converse with people yet. Its to soon. I…I…I can’t." I was on the verge of hyperventilation.
"I think I might take Isabell home. It’s been a long day for her." Jeremiah said. I was truly grateful for him. I was tired and I couldn’t handle anymore.
"We’ll be back soon." My mother said.

Jeremiah and Mark took me out of the store and towards the car. Jeremiah got in, then me, and then Mark.

"Are you okay Isabell?" Jeremiah asked.
"I didn’t want to say no. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings but I just don’t think I could handle meeting anymore new people."
"Its okay Isabell. Your grandmother will understand."
"I feel really tired."
"Well you did have a long day." Mark said.

I leaned on his shoulder. I felt my eyelids close. I could feel the warmth radiating out of him. His head laid on mine. The next thing I know is that I am being scoped up in his arms. This time I didn’t want to be put down. I wanted to rest there. It felt so familiar and I liked it. I heard my door open and shut. He laid me down on the bed but I didn’t want him to go anywhere. I didn’t want him to leave me. I shot up.

"Stay. Please." I asked.
"Isabell I don’t think that will be a good idea."
"Why?"
"Well because your still…vulnerable."
"Please. I don’t want to feel alone."

He contemplated for a minute then nodded his head. I moved over for him and he slid into the bed with me. I pulled his arms around me and I suddenly felt whole again. I felt his grip tighten around me.

Slowly we both drifted off to sleep.