The Cross Bond

One of the most famous missionary couples in history is Jim and Elisabeth Elliot. Their testimonies as missionaries to the Auca Indians are truly amazing and, looking at their lives together, it is evident that God made them for each other. So how did God bring these two together? Through the cross - quite literally.

Both Elisabeth and Jim felt the Lord's call early in their lives. They attended the same Bible College, where both had the testimony of being completely sold out to the Lord. Jim was so committed that he determined to remain single so he could dedicate his entire time and life to God. Through their years at Bible College the two became good friends, and the attraction between them was obvious. But Jim still held to his determination to remain single while Elisabeth believed with her entire heart that God was bringing them together. One night, not long before graduation, the two of them took a walk, which eventually led them to the local cemetery. They sat down on one of the benches and began to talk about their futures and even admitted to their mutual attraction for each other. But Jim was as adamant as ever that he needed to stay single to serve the Lord completely. Elisabeth, realizing that the man is the head of the house, and therefore is the one who must make the steps toward marriage, quietly accepted Jim's decision. But in her own secret time she cried and prayed to God about her feelings for this man. She believed that God was telling her that this was the man for her, so she determined to wait for God to change and work in Jim's heart.

That night as they sat quietly in the graveyard, the moon came out and cast a shadow between them on the bench - a shadow in the shape of the cross. They both agreed that this was a sign between them. It was the cross that had to lead them, and it would be the cross, their taking up that cross and following God's will, that would either bring them together or keep them apart.

This is the way it should be in all our lives when looking for the one God wants us to marry. Whether we feel that we have already found the one or are still waiting for God's leading, our lives need to be dedicated to serving Christ and laying our wills and desires at the foot of the cross. And, just like Elisabeth, we need to realize that with the cross between us and the man we care about, nothing can keep us apart if it is God's will. But if it is not God's will, that cross will keep us from each other.

In the case of Jim and Elisabeth, a few years later they found each other again working in Ecuador and in that moment Jim finally realized that the cross was bringing them together. But sometimes the cross does keep us apart. A sweet young girl very much liked this young man who was faithfully serving God in the ministry. But she never received peace from God and circumstances kept pulling them apart. Though she could not understand why, she chose to follow God and let this man walk away. Several years later, because of some areas in this young man's life that he refused to give over to God; he was no longer able to serve in the ministry. God knew that this would have brought this young woman heartache as her entire life was dedicated to serving Him. Instead, He brought another young man into her life, and they had a sweet ministry serving the Lord in a local church with the youth.

In both of these stories the cross lay between the man and the woman. In one, the cross brought them together for God's glory. In the other, the cross kept them apart - also for God's glory. When we take up the cross, it is not just about following Christ, but following Him with our entire heart and trusting that He will lead us - even in the matter of who and when we are supposed to marry. He loves us, and we must remember that the cross is never meant to be hard, but to protect us and keep us safe in His will, working out what is best both for us and God's glory.