Text Message Jokes

In recent years, one has seen an increase in use of cell phones among people throughout the world. While, earlier, it was just an equipment which made it easier for us to contact other people. Today, it is also considered to be one of the best ways of keeping ourselves entertained. This is because, apart from talking on the phone, there are various things one can do with the cell phone, including listening to music, checking mails, chatting, sending messages, etc. Most people who have cell phones will surely agree with me that sending and receiving forward text jokes are the best way of having fun, when you are really bored. So, if you are running short of jokes, here are some cool as well as funny text message jokes for cell phones.

Some Nice Jokes Through Text Messages

Before we look at the jokes, there is an important thing that you ought to know. Although most of the jokes are funny or really hilarious, there are many which have a tinge of nastiness to them. Hence, such messages should be sent only to people whom you are really close to, and who understand that you do not actually mean it. With this note, let us take a look at some funny, hilarious and nasty text messages.

The Good Ones...

Handsome, Sweet, Intelligent, spontaneous, good-looking, nice friends, charming, funny....well...Enough about ME! How about you?

Last night some devils came running to my room. They wanted to trouble good people, I gave your name and address. They said, OH NO! WE CAN'T DISTURB OUR BOSS.

Do you ever notice that when you're driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?

Why were males created before females?
Because you always need a rough draft before the final copy.

The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

Borrow money from pessimists, they don't expect it back.

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

What is the thinnest book in the world?
What Men Know About Women.

The Funny Ones...

I hate it when you leave, but I would like to see you go.

I've been arrested for being the ugliest person in Britain, can you come down to the police station and show them it's a mistake?

When I called your phone yesterday, I heard this message. "The monkey you called is busy at the moment. Please try again later".

I think drinking and driving is terrible. You always spill it when you change gears...

If you are my good friend, do two things everyday.
First, Pray for me, so I can have long life
Second, Have a bath, so I'm not uncomfortable when you are around.

Hi, it's me your phone. I just had to get out of your pocket for a second because your body odor was killing me.

Giraffe ready? Ready boss!
Zebra ready? Ready boss!
Wolf ready? Ready boss!
Deer ready? Ready boss!
Monkey ready? Ready boss!
Donkey ready? No boss its reading this sms.

I really like u,
I want to talk to u,
I am dying to see u,
But, I can't get to u,
The stupid gatekeeper is asking me 4 a ticket to enter the zoo!

What do you call a woman in heaven?
John: An angel!
A crowd of women in heaven?
John: A host of angels!
All the women in heaven?
John: PEACE ON EARTH!

The Hilarious Ones...

If I'd had a face like yours, I'd sue my parents!

I read on the newspaper that sending text messages causes a radiation that is cancerous. That's why I have decided to stop....to stop reading newspapers.

It's important to find a man who has money, a man who adores you, a man who is great in the sack. The most important: These 3 men should never meet each other!

Lolita called up Boris: Come on over, there's nobody home.
Boris reached Lolita's home, Nobody was home.

A man with six kids gets on a plane. A young lady sitting nearby asks if those were all his kids. He replies "No ma'am I work at the condom factory and these are customer complaints."

This is Ugly Best Friend Day. We can do anything you like, after all it is you day. What time should I stop by and pick you. I prefer to pick you up after dark if that is alright with you.

A train is about 2 crash! A frantic virgin strips off & says "can any1 make me feel like a woman b4 i die?" So a man takes off his clothes & says "iron these!"

MEN-opause MEN-strual pain MEN-tal illness GUY-necologist HIS-terectomy. EVER NOTICED HOW WOMEN'S PROBLEMS START WITH MEN?

You don't know how precious you are to me.
When you cry, I cry
When you laugh, I laugh
When you jump out of the window?
I look down & I'm still laughing.

The Naughty and The Flirty Ones...

I wish I was a teddy bear, that lay upon your bed, so every time you cuddled it, you cuddled me instead.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

Your daddy must be a terrorist, because you are DA BOMB!

Never make love in the garden or in the fields...... Love might be blind but your neighbors aren't!

What is life? Life is love. What is love ? Love is kissing. What is kissing ? Come here and I will show you.

My heart problem has
Reached a critical stage,
That doctor says:
There r only 2 options left...
ICU or You see Me.

I hope that you have enjoyed reading these really hilarious jokes. So, pick up your favorites among them, and send them to your friends and loved ones. I am sure that they would really have a blast reading them. Enjoy!