Supernumerary Nipples

I was born with a third nipple on my chest. This may be too much information for some people, but it is what it is. Having a third nipple does not infer that I am some kind of freak, but you could draw that conclusion from the magazines under my bed.

My extra nipple is fully formed, and is located two inches below my normal, but somewhat hairy left nipple. I believe the Bible says that hairless nipples are an abomination. Don't quote me on that. I have enough problems without making God angry. My thripple has no hair, and in cold weather can be easily noticed through my shirt. Thripple makes it sound like it should come in flavors.

The medical term for my itty- bitty titty is supernumerary nipple or polythelia. Why do all medical terms sound like a venereal disease? Apparently extra nipples are a fairly common occurrence, and 1 in every 18 people have them. I find this hard to believe. I have never met a brother in nipples.

At 56 years of age, I have grown fond of my physical deformity, but as a child it was embarrassing. During gym when they divided us into shirts and skins, you can probably guess which team I ended up on. One time I tried to cover my extra nipple with peanut butter, but it didn't hold up well. Children can be cruel, and my fellow gym rats mocked me unmercifully. They left me alone after I kicked Enrique in the face, and shattered his eye socket. Sometimes violence is the answer. When eyes pop out they are larger than you would think. Just like my brother's penis.

The Medical Journal claims that most of the time extra nipples are not recognized, because they are very small and not well formed. So are my wife's breasts, but I damn sure know what they are. Third nipples are often mistaken for moles. My triple nipple is exceptionally well formed, and you could recognize it from a block away.

All the folks with three nipples should get together for some type of meeting. Polythelia People Unite! Better yet, we could start a support group.

Hi my name is Alan, and I have an accessory nipple.

Hi Alan.

My novel Lyam's Journal ISBN 0741445050 was published February 2008.

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