Sui Caedere: One Day Cigarettes'll Kill You

Sui Caedere

"Your lungs will be fine!" it was exactly 2:00pm. I know. He took my eyes off the clock when he said it.

"Really?!"

"Nope! You’re going to die."

"What?!"

"Suck. The hardest part of being a doctor is feeding the patients the bad news… Ha! Just kidding."

"You’re fucked you know that. Anyway thanks. You sure you don’t want me to pay you?"

"What for? Auscultation?! I merely did anything."

"Well okay, if you say so. Hey, the party’s tonight ok?"

"Yeah yeah. Oh, on your way out, trying talking to her. Jenna’s still mad."

"You… and you’re li’l sister, always got each other’s back as always I see. I’ll talk to her when I feel like it. Has she told you to quit smoking?"

"She told you too?"

"Hundred times. I guess she’ll never make me. Haha!"

"I guess not. You two have been friends before we are, and since then she’s been telling you to stop? Ah, good old days. We were still young at college. I remember, Trevor always have a camera, filming us and everything."

"Yeah, then he gives us a copy every year. Do you still have those?!"

"Yeah, I keep it in my rack. But don’t get me wrong, I don’t watch them alright. I just thought it’d be a waste to throw them."

"Hehe. Those are memories, you should spend time reminiscing it."

"Ack, I don’t want to. Everybody’s embarrassing and irritating habits are all caught in tape."

"Haha! Maybe I’ll try watching it then. See if I can dig up something about you. Well, a check-up’s a check-up. I’ll catch you later. Bring Jenna if she feels like it."

"Inviting her is your job." He paused "And Deck…" He looked at me with a steady gaze. "…let’s have a smoke one time ‘ayt!?"

"Whatever." I slid my arms on my jacket and pushed Peter’s ‘the-doctor-is-never-in’ door.

These days I learned how to gasp for air. I didn’t have to wait to cough up blood to have a check-up. Peter’s a great help. Having a doctor for a friend cuts the bill.

Yesterday’s my birthday, party’s tonight, have a bash at my place, have some friends over, and have a great time. I was looking forward to it; I already had Moss buy cases of beer, sodas and food. It’s like she’s more excited for tonight’s party than me.

I almost smiled as I walk down the stairs, then my phone rang. It was my fucked up boss.

"Deck! I need those stories first thing tomorrow morning, you have until then or you’ll find me firin’ something else other than cigars… your lazy ass! Do you know what happens to people like you?!"

"No sir…" I just had to answer.

"Your types always end up in the streets selling their paintings, begging for food, having to live with their mom again, watching tv and living the rest of their pathetic lives wishing they could have just submit the story their fucking boss ask them to!!!"

"I don’t paint."

"What was that?!"

"I said you’re fucked up."

"What?!"

"I said I’m working on it sir."

"And don’t get me started with your performance here at work! You filthy-"

"Yes sir."

"Your cocky attitude will get you nowhere! If I could just put my foot up in your-

"Yes sir."

"You, lazy bum! Do you know what happens to people like you in this kind of business?!"

"Yes sir, you just told me."

"When I get my hands on you-"

I kept the phone away from my ears and I can still hear him. I know he can’t fire me, I’m his ace writer, and he won’t get any stories better than mine even if he tries. I shut my phone off as I walked outside the hospital. I didn’t even let him finish, heck I’ll deal with him tomorrow. I’ll try to polish that story he wants so bad before the party starts tonight.

"Deck! Over here Deck!" that loud high pitched voice heard from blocks away could only mean one thing, Moss, the annoying girl that lives next door at my apartment. Well, actually my mom and his dad are siblings. So technically we are cousin, neighboring cousins. I’m 3 years older than her. My mom asked me to look after her even though we live in different rooms. Ever since she moved to the city 3 years ago, I’ve become her babysitter, my friends are her friends, and we get along pretty well. That makes her the youngest in the group.

I didn’t think she’d get the job done this fast. I saw her waving her skinny arms callin’ out for me. Her jingling bracelets and high socks always get in my nerves, not to mention her just-woke-up hairdo.

"I’ve got the stuff ready! You won’t believe what happened to me back at the store! This kinky lady talked to me and-"

"Sorry miss, I think you’ve mistaken me for someone else."

"Huh?! Deck?"

"You must have taken me for someone that gives a shit."

"Whoa! Stingy!"

"I’m just playin’. Thanks for helping me out. Come on, I’ll just by some stuff and we can get the place ready."

We went to the store to buy some stuff, few papers, inks, energy drinks and other stuff. Though I can’t shake the feeling that I’m forgetting something, something very important to buy. Guess I’ll just have to buy it later when I have a down pat on it. The store’s just beside our apartment so it’ll be okay.

***
It was 5:00pm; I’ve been working on this piece of shit story for 3 straight hours. I was kinda getting bored, with Moss singing songs while setting the place up, it couldn’t have been worse. I needed more company. Good thing somebody else came.

"Party! Man what’s taking everybody else too long?!" a guy in dreadlocks with bracelets of all kinds in his hands, your modern white Jamaican dood, Ryder. He always acts cool but is down right irritating. But that what makes him Ryder.

"Jumpin’ early, huh Ryder." I said as I took my glasses off.

"Way early! The party won’t start until 8 you walking pompom!" Moss interrupted.

"Walking pompom?! You think that’s soooo funny huh?!. I came early so I can be with the ‘Moss’ beautiful girl in the bash. Haha!" I almost forgot how hooked up Ryder is to Moss. He tried to propose for like 10 ten times, Moss rejects him like 13 times.

"Please." Moss irritated.

"Get a room you two! It’s starting to smell like a motel here." And just when I said that, it hit me, the thing I forgot to buy, I do not smell that scent that motivates me to work, that invigorating scent, the scent that’s like it has been with you for life, the scent of vice, the scent of smoke. No wonder I’m still working on this shit.

"I’m going out!" I said to both of them.

"Where’re you goin’?" Moss said while getting the disco ball ready.

"I’m out of cigs, I’ll be a while."

"Gimme some cash I’ll get it." Ryder offered.

"No it’s fine. You two take advantage of being alone. Though I can’t promise I’d be gone that long."

"Eew! Deck please! With this sicko?!"

And as I hurried downstairs I didn’t even heard what Ryder has to say for that.

***

I never thought of 5pm being this dark before. The streets are less busy and the air gives out a colder chill, I need to buy a new jacket or people will notice I only have one. I wore the hood just for an isolated feel, isolation from everybody else. And along with the chill the memory of Jenna bugged me. I’ve thought of our fight, last night it was terrible. Maybe I am not taking our relationship seriously, maybe she’s too mature or I’m too immature. I can’t help but wonder whether we should still see each other. It pissed my spine just thinking about that. I can already picture her face, angry, smothering me about how I didn’t even bother to give her a call, not to mention inviting her to my party, just when I was already at the hospital she’s working at. The drive made me irritated for some reason, like I’d punch the next guy who’ll bug me.

And I had to wish for it.

Things couldn’t get more fucked up when a gutless punk running in panic shoved me to one side of the road. I flew but he looked worse lying on the ground. I nearly saw anything with the hood I’m wearing, but it hurt like hell. I was so nuts about what happened I took a good one off his collar and shoved him right next to the wall he shoved me into. He was a juvenile, cargo pants and denim jacket; he had a paper bag with who knows what’s inside, some porno magazine or even drugs.

"You little asshole! Watch where you’re going!"

He shut his eyes and looked away, as if he knew I was going to hit him. Well I would, if only he didn’t show that pussy scared face. I want to get him back for what he did. I didn’t want to cause trouble since people are starting to stare, I don’t want to be the villain here. I didn’t know what to do.

"What’s in the bag?!" I asked.

"Please, hit me instead. Don’t take the bag." The punk cried.

"I was just curious on what’s inside but now that you mentioned it, I could just take it right?"

The punk didn’t have a chance to speak. I grabbed the bag from his hands; it was light, like some sort of empty box was inside. He didn’t fight for it; he almost offered it to me. At first he was willing to get trashed as long as he keeps the bag. But those look in his eyes, pale skin and darken eye sockets. Was he high?! He’s sweating and just standing there not saying a word. I know something is definitely wrong.

"The first shot always miss!" the boy said, out of no where.

"Shot?! What shot? Are these drugs?" I was about to open the bag and take a peek when he started running, looking back as he slowly disappears. I didn’t bother going after him.

Next thing I knew I was pounced on the ground got hit again. A man in black suit had put me down. What is wrong with people these days, I was just slammed a minute ago and not too long was I put to the ground by another stranger. He was after the kid. He was the one the kid was looking at. So this is a hot pursuit, and I happened to be caught in it. Strange, is it this bag he’s after?!

***
"sui caedere." I spelled it out unconsciously. It was inside the bag. Should I use it? It should be of some value to those two who I got it from, but it’s their fault for losing it. It’s kinda getting dark. 6pm and I already wasted time outside trying to figure out what I really came out for. I could go straight at the store and buy one, or I could just use this. Who would care actually?

"Sui Caedere Cigarettes" it was written in the box. A piece of cigarette pack inside the brown paper bag. "What a corny name for a cigarette." I thought to myself. But a cigarette is a cigarette. As I open the pack I felt a surge of suspense in me. It’s different from an ordinary cigarette pack, it doesn’t have that blue seal instead it has red with a droplet logo.

I took one out, and gave it a good feel. What’s so special about these sticks anyway? It has a bright red filter and quality paper that wrapped it. What’s even more surprising are the imprinted Sui Caedere all over the cigarette’s body, so much detail over a piece of cigarette if you ask me. I smelled the stick and surprisingly it has a wonderful scent that tempts you to use it.

"Lighter, lighter. Shitburger, I don’t have one!" and just as the scent have won over me, I found myself having no lighter to light it with. I’ve never felt this drive, the drive to try out something new.

"What have you got there?!" a voice from behind startled me.

"Fuck Jeth! What’s your problem?!" I gave a freaked out look at Jeth.

"What?! I just asked you what have you got there?!"

"Man, you freaked me out." Jeth’s my… you can call him a best around buddy. What I do he does, we go way back, had the same nature and philosophy. I was startled when he crept out of nowhere wearing his black and white striped sweatshirt and plain black pants. We both have the same hair color, light brown. "This some new brand of cigarettes, Sui Caedere."

"Sui Caedere? What a corny name for a cigarette."

"Took the words out of my mouth. Want some? Got no light though."

"Nah, I quit. Here you can have this. Happy birthday." Jeth handed me an incredibly cheap lighter, ones that stops working after 10 tries.

"Gee, how thoughtful. Wait, did you just say you quit? Since when?"

"Since that lighter stopped working."

"You’re such an ass." But knowing that, I still tried the lighter out with one Sui Caedere stick. And with incredible luck it worked. And as I thought. nothing, nothing special about it. It just gives you a new nice feel because of it’s unique look. Though I could say the smoke is heavier.

"If I’m still smoking I would have tried it. Anyway, I’d like to see what you’ve done with your place now. Let’s go."

"Oh yeah right, Moss and Ryder’s already upstairs."

***
I finished the stick outside and put the rest of the pack in my pocket. And before we knew it, people started to arrive. They come in, greet me, have some beer and as if their not there again. Groups are starting to form. People talking to people they’ve been talking to before they got to my party. Drinks are flowing.

Ryder’s hitting on Moss as usual. And as usual, Moss tries her best to reject him as painless as possible.

At one side of the room Jeth’s hitting something else, pot. I remembered how he told me he quit smoking. I used to do weed to, I miss it but having a mandatory monthly check up imposed by my boss would fire me if they knew I was on dope. They said it was to make sure my stories are credible. But I guess weed is not the same as cigarette.

Kurt and Nona also arrived with another case of beer. They have been dating for almost forever, and probably have plans of marriage soon. Kurt is the preppy brunette guy, sweat shirt and warmer, the good boy look. But he’s as twisted as me and Jeth when it comes to nature. Redhead Nona has no complains though, she is totally fine with that, she can deal with Kurt whenever, wherever, his weaknesses are her strength and Kurt’s family have pretty much approved of her.

If Peter, Trevor and Jenna would arrive all the people I need to be here would be complete. That about sums up the group, me, Jeth, Moss, Ryder, Kurt, Nona, Peter, Trevor and Jenna. Few other people came but they’re a waste of brain cells.

As for me? I’m still stuck at my work. I can’t concentrate with all the people coming in and greeting me. That fucked up boss of mine will have his day. It’s had-a-party-and-lose-a-job for me.

"What the-- working during your own party?! Come on man. And everybody’s here too." The cat dragged in a twisted doc, it was Peter, and finally he arrived.

"Since when did you arrive?!"

"When you were writing page 30. Quit that story telling granny goose and look what I found on your doorway," he went to the living room.

He returned and dragged a half droned guy he grabbed at the collar. He stinks of alcohol already and only 2 cases of beer have just been opened. But that worn out t-shirt, rugged pants and multi colored hair is very familiar.

"I won’t do it again officer!" he yelled out of intoxication. It was Trevor, weirdest, noisiest and most reckless. I invited him but said that he’ll try to catch up after going to another friend’s party. Looks like that party got the best of him. He reeks of tequila and rum. In the group he’s the one that goes down fastest.

"Come on Trevor, you can stay at my room." I said.

"Please officer I won’t do it again! I don’t want to spend the night in prison!"

"Trevor you’re at my place, you’re drunk."

"Please officer I beg of you! Let me pass just tonight! My man Deck is throwing a party!"

"Trevor."

"Officer."

"Want me handle it?" Jeth offered.

"No, I got this..." I handed Trevor a cigarette stick "Here’s a ticket." he slid it in his shirt pocket. "Don’t let me catch you again understand?"

"Yes officer!" and off Trevor go, to my room, crashed like the good boy he is.

"Smooth man." Peter cried.

"Like you don’t know how to deal with him." I paused. "You two got here all by yourselves?"

"What you really meant to say is ‘where’s you lovely sister that I wish to see?’ huh?"

"Shut up. Ok where’s Jenna?"

"Out on your door, she said she didn’t want to go. I know she couldn’t resist you. You two are playing like kids. You’re like high school you know."

"I’ll go get her."

She’s biting her nails, tapping her toes and constantly looking at her watch. Jenna seems to be pissed just like yesterday. I didn’t know what to say or what to do. I didn’t even know why I offered to bring her in. I have to break the tension, she’s looking at me now, and all I can do is to look back. Somehow I missed her, her serious stare and those truthful eyes. And she had to say the first words.

"I came because Peter begged me to. Thank him. Once he leaves, I leave." She’s mean as always. "Here. Happy birthday." She gave me a small box with red ribbons, a gift.

I didn’t have a chance to say thanks and she already went inside. I followed her. She grabbed a drink as I placed the box in a near by table. I tried talking to her, tried to say how sorry I was and how I miss her. But I guess this is not the right time. She grabbed Moss and Nona, started chatting with them. I went back to my room instead.

I turned off my laptop and decided to join the party. I haven’t finished what I was working on but it’s the least of my worries. I saw Trevor half asleep, trying to get in his feet and into the living room. The laptop finished shutting down, Jeth’s behind me, creeping as always.

"Tough night? Here, you left it at the table. Jenna got it for you right. You should open it." Jeth insisted.

I opened the box. It was a pack of Marlboro, limited edition; I’ve only seen it once but didn’t buy it since Jenna told me to quit smoking. I bet she thought it’s impossible to get it out of my system, so she bought it anyway. Together with it is a lithium wind proof lighter, plain black, elegant. I searched for her, and as our eyes met I raised the box in a thank you manner. She just looked away.

"What a wicked looking lighter Deck! Let’s try it out man." Ryder took the lighter and the Marlboro out of my hands.

"Hey! Just the lighter, give the smokes back. I’m not opening it."

"Stingy! Alright, the lighter it is then." He returned the pack to me and took the lighter.

"Stingy? You’ve been hanging out with Moss too much. Anyway, leave the Marlboro alone. Here, you can hit this." I handed him a Sui Caedere cigarette I pulled out of my pocked.

"Whoa! A more wicked looking cigarette. Fine, I’ll be at the balcony." Since my room is the only place that has a ventilator, he has to light it outside. That was around 11pm.

***
Now it’s 1:45am and the party’s starting to feel dumb. Some people have already left. A handful of people remained. Kurt started to throw up, clinging on Ryder’s shoulders, wasted and all. Nona and Moss helped in the cleaning. Meanwhile, Trevor’s up in his feet pissing people around, the exact opposite of what he is hours ago. Jeth’s at a corner, sitting at a sofa looking high, smiling silly. Peter’s not what you’ll call sober. And that means Jenna’s still here since she said she’ll leave when Peter leaves.

I sat beside her.

"Jenna, honey, I’m-"

"Don’t honey me."

"I’m sorry. Look, I feel like a jerk. Last night, I was not myself. I tried talking to you. But-"

"You were at the hospital this afternoon. Why didn’t you look for me?"

"You knew?"

"I saw you in Peter’s log book."

"Oh. I was afraid of you."

"Real mature."

"Jenna I-"

"Aaaaaahhh!!!!!" I dreadful scream cut the conversation. It came from the kitchen, I’m positive it was Moss. I remembered that Kurt’s drunk, something might have happened.

I’d let Ryder handle it, but…

"Help! Deck! Peter!" Moss screamed in panic. I hurried in the kitchen thinking that it was something terrible. I bumped on Nona on my way in; she went straight for the bathroom, looking sick. I panicked even more, I rushed in, Trevor and Jenna following behind me.

"What’s wrong did something happened to Kurt?!" Jenna cried.

"Ryder!" Moss screamed. As I looked for Kurt, he was standing in the corner, looking all freaked out, confused. The situation made him sober. It was not him after all. He was staring at the floor.

It was Ryder, a horrible sight, unexplainable. Blood started coming out of Ryder’s mouth, he was not coughing or throwing up blood. He was spewing it, like he couldn’t control it. His eyes wide open, clinching on his chest with one hand, the other reaching out for us. He looked like he was in a lot of pain. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t stand. He tried to close his mouth but the blood forced its way out. We didn’t know what to do. Even though he can’t say it, I know he’s begging for help. He tried to scream while in pain. He was crying. Torture would be the best way to describe it. He rolled on the floor, blocking his mouth, gasping, grabbing his neck and chest. He tried to stand up but couldn’t.

"Deck what’s happening to Ryder!" Moss tried to control her tears.

"Kurt! Do something! Help me out! Trevor, go call an ambulance! Jenna, what’s happening?!" I asked her, being a nurse, hoping she could explain it.

"I don’t know! I’ve never seen anything like this! I’ll go wake Peter!"

Kurt got hold of Ryder, forcing him to stand up. I tried to stop the gush of blood, blocking his mouth. But it was no use. The whole kitchen floor is now covered in blood. He’s losing too much. Moss is just standing there, watching in shock. I really don’t know what to do. He’s starting to turn blue, it just won’t stop. His eyes are turning white, I felt him getting lighter and lighter. He’ll die if this continues. Everybody’s in panic. Kurt gave in, he let go of Ryder.

"Deck…" he said.

The blood show is over. Kurt and I are already bathing in our friend’s own blood pool. I knelt down, rest Ryder’s back on the cupboard, sat next to him, and wiped my face from fatigue. Then I realized I was wiping with Ryder’s blood. I was staring blankly into space, thinking about what just happened. He was unbelievably unrecognizable now. His eyes are open but he was dead.

Moss is crying; Kurt is just as shocked as me, everybody else can’t believe what just happened. The ambulance arrived with Trevor showing the paramedics the way in. The look on their faces told me that they too, can’t explain what they saw. Jenna held my hand.

"I’m sorry." She said.

"What just happened?"

***

5am and my apartment still reek of blood. I don’t think I can clean this up, I don’t think none of us can. We saw Ryder’s body covered in white sheet. It doesn’t look like a body anymore. He became so thin he made the sheet like it was covering nothing. Paramedics have started asking questions, questions that can only be answered by another question.

"Hey, it’s okay man. We’ll figure this out. I’m going back once I walk Nona home. She’s talking to Ryder when it happened. She saw Ryder’s face before he died. ‘He looked like he can’t handle the pain, then started spewing blood.’ she said. You handle things over here. Email me if something comes up." Kurt told me his leave.

"Okay man. Take care of Nona."

"I’ll go with him. Paramedics have finished questioning me. I’ll help you clean up when I get back." Jeth implied.

"Sure."

"Mister Fox, thank you for your cooperation and statements, we’ll try to contact you once we’re done on the autopsy." One of the paramedics said. I was so tired and shocked of what happened, I can’t even recall them questioning me, or what I might have answered.

My place was closed, the kitchen had yellow tapes. Paramedics suspect food poisoning. But having everyone eat the same food cancels it out. Peter now wide awake explains how things like this have never occurred in the field of medicine. He’s as clueless as we are. Jenna’s sleeping in my shoulder. We stayed at Moss’s pad since mine will give me the creeps now. Trevor came with Ryder’s body in the hospital.
***

We were so tired of what happened we didn’t realized what time it is. It was past 3pm when I took a look at my watch. Peter’s watching tv with Moss, and Jenna’s still beside me. It’s past lunch time, we should probably eat something. I wonder if any of them is in the mood for anything.

"What to grab something to eat?" I asked no one in particular.

"How does spaghetti sound?" Peter said without taking his eyes of the tv.

"So not funny." Moss cried. "I think I’m going to bed, wake me up when there’s news from Trevor." I don’t want to assume anything, but if I hadn’t known better, I’d think Moss is feeling guilty for some reason. She’s been a drag but she’s Ryder’s friend too. Not to mention we live in the same building, and she’s my cousin after all, like a little sister.

I lift Jenna’s head from my lap and placed a pillow under it. She’s fast asleep, probably because of all those overtime plus what happened this morning. I left her there and went to talk to Moss. She wasn’t sleeping at all, just sitting at her bed staring blankly into space.

"Moss." I said.

"Deck. Ryder." Moss replied with tearful eyes.

"We didn’t know."

"But I have always put him down. Not paying attention. Do you think he held something against me? I wish I could have made his last night worth living. All I say to him are bad things! I can’t help feeling guilty!"

"Moss. You didn’t know. Heck if I knew even I wish I could have given him more time, more weed, more beer and cigarettes. Cheer up, for him. It’s the least we can do."

"Thanks Deck. I’ll try."

I’ve never seen Moss like this, having to endure seeing Ryder die that way. She can’t even stand horror movies or sci-fi films, and he saw a similar scene in real life. I wonder how things will turn out.

"Deck." Peter called out.

"I just got a call from Trevor. Says they are done with Ryder’s body. He wants us to go there, said he was getting lonely."

"Come to think of It, why did we let him go? He hadn’t had much sleep and he’s drunk like hell last night. Come with me Peter."

"Sure. Moss, you and Jenna wait for us. I’ll pick her up after we’re done at the hospital."

"Sure. Be careful." Moss replied.

***

It was already dark when we reach the hospital; around 5pm. Peter didn’t bring his car, so we had to take a cab. I can’t imagine I was in this same hospital this afternoon freaking out that something might be wrong with me. I walked out with good news of my health, and now I am coming back again because my friend died with an unexplainable reason. We went straight for the lobby, where we saw Trevor sleeping. He looked tired and wasted.

"Trevor. Trevor wake up. Trevor." I nudged him.

"Officer?!"

"Not that again!"

"Oh hi Deck. Sorry, I dozed off. It took you guys forever to get here." Trevor got back to his senses. We went outside since talking about what happened back at my place might freak out eves droppers.

"Sorry, we had a hard time taking the cab. How’s it going here?"

"No good. They’ve finished up with Ryder but they can’t explain anything. One doctor even said that releasing all of the human body’s blood just from the mouth is completely impossible. I just keep nodding my head since I have no idea what he’s blabbing about." Trevor told his story.

"They said all of Ryder’s blood was gone? Not even a trace?" Peter asked Trevor.

"None. They said that the only blood that is left are the ones in his clothes. And the ones in my hands, and on your fingernails, and on your kitchen floor, and on other girl’s babies, and-"

"Quit it, you still have the nerves to joke around… hmmm…Bizzare." Peter rubs his chin.

"Sorry Pete. What if it’s a disease Deck?! And what if we all caught it?!"

"Relax, what did Ryder do that we didn’t huh?! Unless he’s taking something else that we don’t know about." I replied.

"Well, there’s no use thinking about it much. It just makes me recall that horrible sight. I’m gonna miss Ryder. How’s the others?" Trevor asked.

"Sis stayed at Moss’ pad. Kurt and Nona went home already. Everybody freaked out and had to go home. You should too." Peter answered.

"Good. That’s great. Well anyway, ever since I came here I haven’t eaten anything. All I did was to drink at that water dispenser since it’s free. Heck even if I’m not thirsty."

"You’re probably dehydrated from all that drinking last night. You want to grab something?" I offered him.

"Nah. I just need a smoke."

"I didn’t bring any with me. You have some sticks with you Peter?" I said.

"It’s okay, I still have that ‘ticket’ you gave me last night. I haven’t actually gone home you know. Still wearing this jacket."

"Haha! You remembered that huh. Here let me light that for you." I took out the lighter Jenna gave me as a gift and handed it to Trevor.

Peter looked tired. People are starting, looking at his face, probably recognizing him, he does work in this hospital after all. "Let’s get out of here; I’m tired of this place. What are your plans anyway?"

"I’m heading home, get a good night sleep and try to forget everything that happened." Trevor answered.

"What about you?" Peter gazed at me.

"Me? I think I’ll crash at Moss’. I’ve slept there once anyway. You’re going to pick Jenna aren’t you? Let’s go back together." Looks like I can’t stay at my pad alone. The memory of Ryder still haunts me in my head. If I were to stay there I might start seeing things.

Trevor parted ways with me and Peter. He took a different cab. As for us, we took a drive thru at Mcdonalds. I recalled Jenna not eating anything since the party, and Moss saying that she’s not in the mood to eat lunch, and it’s already six when we left the hospital, so they are probably starving. The taxi driver has a slow pace; it took us nearly 1½ hour just to get back at our apartment. We got off the cab and Peter paid for it. Just as I was about to open the door, I found 1 missed call from my phone. It was Trevor. I thought it might be important since it‘s not been long since we parted ways, so I gave him a return call.

"Trevor. It’s me."

"Oh thank God Deck! I thought you already went to sleep! I can’t get inside the house; I forgot my keys at your room. Probably fell while I was sleeping last night." Trevor explained.

"What was that? Something came up?" Peter asked me.

I covered the phone’s mouth piece and told Peter the situation.

"Tell him I’ll drop it at his place. Don’t make him go here. It’ll be a waste of time. His house is on our way home anyways." Peter offered.

"Hey Trevor. just wait in your front lawn. Peter’s gonna drop by and give you your keys. Okay?"

"Got that Deck. Thanks Peter." And then Trevor hang up.

We went straight upstairs, and expectedly, Moss is already starting to cook something.

"Don’t mind Moss, we got take-outs." I said.

"Perfect, I’m not in the mood to cook anyways. But c’mon, Mcdonalds?" Moss complained.

"Looks like you got your energy back. How about you sis?" Peter took a look at Jenna.

"I’m fine, got enough sleep. How’s Ryder’s body?" Jenna asked Peter.

"No good, they can’t come up with anything."

"I see. I’d like to go home once we’re done eating ok? I want to forget everything about today." Jenna insisted.

***
Jenna and Peter helped cleaning up after they were done eating. All of us are tired. 8:30pm might still be early but since everything’s fucked up, we all need our rest. So Peter and Jenna decided to go.

"We’ll talk some other time Deck." Jenna said in a mild tone, gave me a peck in the cheeks.

"Yeah. Thanks hon…" I kissed her back. "And Peter. Don’t forget Trevor’s keys." I glanced at him.

"Yeah yeah. He’s always a trouble maker." Peter replied as he closed the door.

Moss and I are left for tonight. She’ll be scared so a sleepover is fine. Moss is not the type that Jenna’s going to be jealous at anyways. I’ve slept in her couch once so things will be easier. After she took a bath, I took one too. I realized how long it was since my last one. I’ve never felt so sleepy this early; I couldn’t care less even if I have to sleep on the floor. And slowly I could feel my eyes getting heavy, slowly I was dozing off.

"Deck your phone is flashing." Moss startled me.

"Huh?! Oh." I grabbed my phone and wiped my eyes. "It’s Trevor." I told Moss, and then she went straight to her room.

I can’t believe Peter’s still not at his place. I also forgot to give him a call and tell him that they were going to stay for a bite to eat, and that it will take some time for him to get his keys. And just when I was about to answer his call, the battery went dead. What wrong timing. Trevor will be pissed.

"Moss do you have a phone charger?"

"Yeah it’s at one of the drawers near the sofa!" she shouts it out from inside her bedroom.

And even though she said it was in one of the drawers, I still couldn’t find it. It took me a while before actually realizing that I was looking at a different place. I found it eventually and slammed the thing in my cell. It took a while before my phone starts back up again. I turned it on as fast as I could so I can give Trevor a call. But as I was about to press the ‘call’ button. A different call came in. it was from Peter.

"Deck. Good you’re still awake. I’ve been trying to reach you for minutes now!" Peter’s sounds frustrated.

"Sorry, my battery went dead. Where are you? Have you arrived at Trevor’s?"

"It’s Trevor."

"Yeah, he just gave me call, but I couldn’t answer, probably waiting for you guys to arrive, since we told him you’ll be there hours ago. Give him a call and-"

"He’s dead."

"What?!"

"He’s dead. He’s at his lawn, lying face first."

"What do you mean?"

"It’s…"

"What?!"

"It’s like Ryder."

"You mean…"

"He’s swimming on his own blood, no wounds, his mouth’s full of it, we found him holding his cell with your number still on the screen. He was calling for you."

"He was still alive when…" Moss got out of the room, probably heard me screaming.

"Something wrong?" she said.

"Nothing. It’s nothing. Peter just got a flat tire, said he needs help. Just go to bed, I’ll be back and fetch him." I was already putting on my jacket when I said that. I didn’t want to freak Moss out. He just a terrible day, another death of a friend would be traumatic.

"I’ll be right there Peter, wait for me." I left Moss.

I took a cab from our place to Trevor’s. Since it’s already near midnight, the air has been very cold. What bizarre happening is this? I gave it some thought, about what Trevor told us back at the hospital, that what if it’s a disease? Or what if we all caught it? But even so, why not all at the same time? I’m starting to feel that this matter needs investigating. I was lost in thought when I noticed I was already in front of Trevor’s house. Peter and Jenna sitting at the side walk, paramedics cleaning up at the scene. Jeth’s there too, Peter must have called him. He smokes when he gets anxious, but this time he’s just standing there.

"Deck!" Jenna ran and embraced me. She was crying, terrified. Death after death she might have thought.

"Honey it’s ok. What happened? Did you saw him? Peter did she saw Trevor?"

"No, I told her to look away. It’s terrible man. He looked just like Ryder. What’s going on exactly?" Peter said with frustrated eyes. "You don’t think we-"

"Hell no! don’t start on a thing like that." This is all just a terrible mistake. We can figure this out. And if I’m not mistaken, I think I might have a lead.

I was thinking thoroughly when the paramedics passed me by with a stretcher with a sheet covering something. I know it was Trevor’s body. A few hours ago I was talking about ‘Ryder’s body’ with Trevor, now I’m talking about his. Irony indeed.

"Hon, I’m scared." Jenna gripped my arm.

"I’m here hon. Don’t be, we’ll figure this out. I left Moss at home; I’m a little bit worried. I’ll ask Peter if you could all stay at the pad tonight. Are you fine with that?" I offered her since I’m too worried to leave anyone alone. "I’ll be back. ‘kay? I stood up and walked towards Jeth.

"What do you think is happening?" I asked him, still looking at Jenna wondering if she’ll be okay, she stares back.

"Don’t know. I just got here as soon as Peter called me." So Peter did call him. "I feel sorry for those two. You think it’s something? Like a disease maybe?" he thought of the same thing Trevor did.

"Trevor said the same thing. But I really don’t know."

We watched as the health crew investigate and finishes up. Trevor was living alone in his mother’s old house. They don’t know of his death yet, we don’t actually know how to break it to them.

After everything at Trevor’s place we decided to go home. Peter agreed to stay too after he pick some stuff from their house. Jenna and I took another cab home. She’s quiet; I can’t read her, or what she’s thinking. Is it our fight, or the weird happenings in our circle? I held her hand, she didn’t look at me but I saw her smile from the cab’s window. I should be by her side especially at times like this. The ride was faster since it’s already midnight. The cab pulled over in front of our apartment, Moss is standing outside, a coat wrapping her body.

"Moss. You waited for me?"

"I was worried Deck! Something happened, I know."

"How did y-"

"Peter didn’t bring his car, he couldn’t have a flat tire." Moss said with a worried face.

"You’re still lame at making excuses Deck." Somehow Jenna found a way to cheer herself up. She can smile a bit now.

"Tell me Deck, what happened!?" Moss insisted.

"Maybe tomorrow cuz’. I know you’re tired to. Let’s just get some sleep. Would you mind waiting for Peter while I take a shower?"

"Peter’s coming too? Are they staying for the night? That’s cool, I feel safer. Sure." Moss replied. She’s not in her joyful, annoying self, it must be the stress.

Soon Peter arrived. We got ready for bed and tried not to think of what happened today. We’ll try to figure things out by tomorrow.

***

"Trevor’s dead?!" Moss almost burst into tears.

"We found him on his porch." Jenna said. She has recovered from everything yesterday.

"But he was just calling Deck!"

"That’s right, he was calling your cousin when he was dying, he wanted help, but could only dial Deck’s number since it was on his recently dialed list. Unfortunately, he died the same way Ryder did."

"The same way Ryder did. Why is this happening?!"

"Nobody knows. Don’t worry, all of us will figure it out." Jenna sounded so mature. She handled Moss calmly, Moss didn’t even freak out. If I were the one to tell her, it would have been a mess.

Last night I asked Jeth and Kurt to drop by at my place to have things cleaned up. Jeth came first, a little while later, Kurt followed.

"He’s here. Let’s get cleaning." I meant Kurt to everyone.

"Sorry it took me long. Nona wanted me to stay with her a little longer. Said she was afraid. If I had not known her that well; I’d say she’s over reacting. And don’t mention Trevor to her. She still doesn’t know." Kurt explained.

"You two are really sweet with each other. You really love her don’t you Kurt. I’m so jealous." Jenna said. I didn’t have to be a genius to figure out what she meant by ‘I’m so jealous.’

"Hey, I’m right over here! I can actually here you."

"Oh honey you’re there! Well I didn’t mean to! I mean, I have no idea you actually care! Teehee!" Jenna teased me.

"Well at least it’s good to know you got your energy back."

"I was just joking. How ‘bout a kiss?" She just keeps on teasing me.

The boys cleaned the kitchen. The blood is harder to remove now since it’s all dried up. It would be fine if it was just few, but having to clean this much blood, it’s both scary and depressing. I mean it’s practically almost 7% of Ryder’s body we are mopping around! I asked the girls to stay out of the hallway since we are constantly passing by with buckets of red liquid.

We were almost done when my phone rang. Just when I can’t handle this much stress, somebody who’s fucked up called.

"Fox!!! You didn’t show up at work yesterday you bastard! You asshole!" it was my boss. I forgot to finish what he was asking for.

"Sir, it was an emergency. Two of my-"

"I don’t care what kind of emergency that is! If you don’t show your lazy little ass in front of me, I’m gonna have you fired! Understood?! Zappy’s Diner at 1! And bring your report!" He hangs up and didn’t even bother to hear me out. Actually, it’s fine by me if he wants me fired. I can use this story as some other publishing company.

"Can you guys handle things over here? I’ll be back soon." I told everyone as I put my jacket on.

"Where are you going?" Jenna asked.

"Zappy’s. My boss wants to see me; I forgot I haven’t submitted my final draft yet. Don’t worry, it’s not like I’m thinking too much of work instead of figuring this out. He’ll probably get me fired after anyway."

"Zappy’s? Let me come with you." Jenna offered.

"It’ll be boring."

"It’s okay. Atleast he can’t scold you too much if I’m there." She insisted.

"Suit yourself. Borrow a jacket from Moss. It’ll be chilly."

So I took Jenna with me and walked our way to Zappy’s. It was a worn out diner surrounded by modern restaurants. I don’t know why they still have it there, if you ask me I think it should be burnt down. It’s no fun to hang out, and people are mostly snobs and faggots. "Boring" sums it up. Maybe that’s why boss like to stay there. And speak of the devil; I can already see him rubbing his beard while reading today’s paper.

The sound of the bell as I pushed the door when I came in caught the bastard’s attention. I held Jenna’s hand tight just so he won’t shout at me.

"Did you bring it Fox?! Where the hell is your report! You even had the guts to show your girlfriend your pathetic life as a writer?!" and I guess bringing her didn’t help either.

"*giggles* he’s your boss?!" Jenna pinched my arm. She found him hilarious.

"Shut up hon, he’ll both kill us." I warned her.

"What are you two love birds whispering about?! Did you bring it or not?!" He’s getting agitated.

"I brought it! I brought it! Listen, boss, two of my friends, just past away. I don’t think I will be able to work for some quite time."

"You’re taking a leave?" suddenly he’s calm.

"Yeah. I won’t be working for some days." Somehow I feel his sympathy.

"You’re lucky I’m in a hurry. I’ll let you have a leave, in exchange you’ll do a little homework."

"Homework?! What’s this middle school?!" Jenna interrupted.

"Shut up hon!" I almost pinched her too much.

"Yes homework. I want you to write me the finest story you could make up until your leave is done. Understood?!"

"That won’t be a problem. That’s fine boss. How about a week?"

"Just a week then. You go further and I’ll have you fired even before you could resign. Now for a final job before you go."

"What?"

"Go grab me coffee. Black, low fat and no sugar." He made that up just so he could make fun of me in front of Jenna.

"What the fu-"

"You want your leave or not?"

"I’m on it I’m on it."

"Make it to-go ok?! Good boy." I left Jenna as the table while I get the bastard’s request.

After this I can have a leave, I can slack off or rather I could find out what happened to Trevor and Ryder. Not to mention I’ll have to attend two funerals this week.

The waitress handed me the coffee, it was hot. I bought additional coffees for everyone back at my place. Nobody has slept completely yet, caffeine is just their body needs. Back at the table I can see how irritated Jenna’s look as my boss puffs his cigarette smoke right at her face.

"We’ll be going boss. Thanks for the leave."

I guess he can sympathize after all. His mood suddenly changes. I feel sorry for every time I called him asshole behind his back. Seeing him smoke like that, reminds me of my dad. Also, it reminds me, I haven’t smoked anything since yesterday! I remembered I had some stick in my jacket pocket. The Sui Caedere I got from that punk.

I dug my hands inside of my pocket, felt the cigarette pack and drew it out. It was upside down. Some cigarettes even fell. Something’s weird is written underneath the pack.

"Cigarette is Death." Jenna read it aloud. I didn’t notice she was looking at me when I pulled it out. "Shouldn’t it be ‘Cigarette smoking is Dangerous to your health?" she added.

"Dunno, I just got this from some weird kid."

Just then I got a gut feeling that I should notice something by now. I took a stick and put it in my mouth.

"I told you to quit smoking!" Jenna snagged the cigarette from my mouth. "One day that thing will kill you!" she continued.

I didn’t react to what she said. Something terrible made my heart beat fast. My hands got cold, I began to sweat, I tasted horror in my mouth. Am I being imaginative or am I on to something. I felt a surge of discovery. I felt the terror that might have brought these things upon me and my friends.

"Maybe it already did…" I said

"What?!"

"Jenna, could you go on ahead. Give the coffees to everyone. I have some thing to take care of. Really. it would be better if you don’t come along." I told Jenna.

"What?! Why?!"

"Honey, could you just go? Please?"

"Well at least walk me at your front door!" she angrily said. And so I did. I have a hunch that I wish was wrong. All the way up to my apartment, she didn’t speak a word. She thought I didn’t trust her again. But what can I do. If I told her my speculations she just might think I’m crazy. Maybe after I confirmed this thing I could tell her.

We arrived in front of my building, Jeth was standing outside. Jenna just went straight in, didn’t say anything.

"What’s wrong?" Jeth asked.

"Perfect timing, come with me. I have a feeling."

"What feeling?" I didn’t explain it at him while standing at the door way.

I dragged him to the place where he crept on me last night, the place where I found that weird punk, the place where I got the cursed cigarette, that Sui Caedere.

"What do you mean it must have been the cigarettes?!" Jeth said with a surprised look.

"Look." I let him see the cigarette’s pack. "It’s unusual to have ‘Cigarettes is Death’ instead of the usual ‘Cigarette smoking in dangerous to your health’ warning isn’t it? And instead of a blue seal, it has a red, with a droplet logo. Plus, the weird filter color." I continued.

"I can’t follow." Jeth said as he scratches his head.

"The droplet logo and red seal, it has to be pertaining to blood. And that filter with a weird red color, I don’t know, maybe some weird Chinese drug is inside. I recalled the ones that have tried the cigarette. Trevor and Ryder, they both died in similar ways. And they are the only ones who ever tried it!"

"Didn’t you try it?! I was with you when you did." Jeth said confidently.

"Yeah, I took a note on that. But the punk that I got this pack from, I remembered he mention ‘the first shot always miss.’, this must mean that the first cigarette drawn from the pack is safe. There has to be some kind of mechanism in it."

"You’re saying the cigarette killed Trevor and Ryder, you survived because you used the first cigarette drawn?"

"Maybe."

"Then what are we doing here exactly?"

"I was hoping the boy might return."

"Shouldn’t we tell the others first?"

"Maybe you’re right. That kid won’t just coincidentally pass us here at this hour."

We were running when we got back.

***


"What’s the rush?" Kurt said. I unconsciously ignored him and threw my jacket at his face.

I rushed to my room to check on the internet. I have to make one last move to be able to say that my guess is credible. I opened my laptop, and anxiously waited. As I opened the browser, I typed in the name of the cigarette "Sui Caedere" I though it might have been another language.

Bingo.

I was right. It was Latin, Latin for "To kill one self", in other words, suicide. It fits perfectly since you yourself light up your own cigarette, but not knowing that it’ll kill you, technically, you killed yourself.

I ran outside the balcony to tell everyone, hoping they would believe me. To my horror, I saw a familiar thing on the ground.

"What’s that?!" I asked Kurt while pointing at the ground.

He blew smoke. "Cigarette. Found it in your jacket."

The horror froze me. I was a moment late. If I was right, I would regret it my whole life. I looked at Kurt’s eyes.

"What?! I can have one right? I know you won’t mind me-"

I grabbed his collar and shoved him at the wall.

"You fuck!!!" I yelled. "Fuck Kurt! Fuck!!!"

"What man?! If it’s that expensive, I’ll buy you a new pack!"

"That’s not it man! You’re Fucked!"

"Man, you’re the one who’s fucked up here!"

"You don’t understand! The cigarette!"

The girls are staring, Moss has a frighten look in her eyes, and Jenna’s about to grab me, control me. Peter walked towards me and called me out.

"Peter! The cigarette, I thought I might be it!"

"I had a feeling." Peter replied. It looks like I wasn’t the only one that thought about it.

"What are you guys mumbling about? You’re scaring the shit out of me!" Kurt panicked.

"Listen to me Kurt, how much did you use?!"

"Only one. Fuck man, let it on me straight!"

"I’m thinking the cigarette might be the reason. Why Trevor and Ryder…"

"Don’t screw with me man! Don’t screw with me!"

"Kurt I’m serious! Sui Caedere is Latin for ‘to kill one self’! The pack has a red seal symbolizing blood, so as the filter that who knows what’s inside! At the bottom of the pack ‘cigarette is death’ was written. I won’t joke about this kind of thing man!" I don’t want to scare Kurt but I have no other choice.

"Fuck man!" Kurt took my hands off of him; he dropped the lighter he found with the cigarette, he started pacing back and fort. His face is restless, brushing his frequently.

"Are you serious man?!"

"There’s no time to panic!"

"You have 3 hours to think about what to do." Peter interrupted.

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

"Ryder smoked one right after Sis and me arrived at your party; let’s say that was 11:00, it was around clean up time at 2am that he died. Trevor smoked that thing he called a ‘ticket’ at 6pm before he left us at the hospital. He called you at around 10, same time we arrived and saw his body. Both occurred in three hours." Peter gave a precise explanation.

"Fuck man, how do we stop this?! If it’s poison there has to be a way to fight it right? Like an antidote?" Kurt asked Peter.

"I don’t know. Try taking antibiotics until we figure things out and-" Peter was interrupted.

"Deck. Are you sure?" Moss asked me with a worried face.

"70% cuz. But it’s better than nothing. Don’t worry, I’ll keep that pack for investigation, you don’t have to worry. As for Kurt well figu-" Moss started crying. She ran away and bumped me on her way out. I didn’t understand why, but…

"Deck!" Jenna screamed! "Moss!"

"Moss?"

"She used one too." Jenna said.

"What?! Dammit! Are you sure? Not Moss! Please!"

"That’s right. She used one too, same time I did. She wanted to learn how to smoke, how to make smoke rings, nose bridges, to light a cigarette from another, those stuff. So I gave her one. But she didn’t finish it. She said she didn’t like it." Kurt explained.

"Fuck Kurt! She’s my cousin!" I almost punched him.

I didn’t think about it, I just realized that I have already ran outside to follow her. She didn’t finish one stick, maybe she has more than 3 hours. I just hope my theories are all bullshit. I saw Jenna following me from behind.

"Let’s find her Deck. Why would she ran away?!" Jenna said.

"She saw Ryder died. Maybe she doesn’t want to die in such a painful way." I went into silence. "Moss is just a kid."

"What do you think she’ll do? Will she-"

"No she won’t. If she’s afraid of pain, I’m sure she’s more afraid of dying. She won’t do anything reckless. She just ran off without thinking. But we still have to find her, to figure things out and prevent the unimaginable."

***

Almost 3 hours have passed since Kurt took the cigarette. We still can’t find Moss. I’m getting more worried now, but if guessed right, Moss still has a lot of time. Kurt is in more danger. We decided to go back.

"I don’t wanna die! I don’t wanna die! Fuck man! Do something!" Kurt looks terrible.

"Shit. I can’t do anything more. I’ve given you all the prophylaxis I know to avoid poisoning! You will just have to fight it Kurt!" Peter said.

"Where’s Kurt, is he okay?!" I asked as I barged in.

"I don’t know. Let’s just hoped what I gave him will be enough. You gotta be strong Kurt."

"I don’t wanna die! Deck, man, do something! Fuck please!" Kurt looked pitiful, he’s crying, sweating and trembling. "Nona! Please call Nona!". He’s about to die and he is still searching for Nona.

That moment I felt terrible, I wished I could have done something. Why did I ever take that cigarette from that kid? Kurt can’t leave Nona, not just yet.

"Deck! I can’t breathe!" Kurt started holding on his chest. We were right. "Deck! Peter! Fuck I don’t want to die!"

"Kurt!" Jenna couldn’t stand to watch. She began to cry.

"I don’t want to die! Please don’t let me die! You got to do something!"

"Kurt! Hold on man! You can make it! You can’t die! Nona! For Nona you can’t die! She’s waiting for you!"

"No-na. Tell her…I…love her Deck." Kurt is starting to fall. He can’t stand up. His eyes are getting dim, he grabs his chest even tighter. Me and Peter got a hold on him.

"Hang on buddy! Kurt you can fight it!" Peter yelled. "Jenna get us some towels!

"Kurt! Kurt! Stay with us Kurt!" I yelled just so Kurt could hear. He’s not responding, he has become numb. Blood has already stared dripping from the sides of his mouth. "Fuck no! Kurt!!!!" I couldn’t do anything else.

"Here! Put it in his mouth!" Peter gave me a towel, I jammed the towel in his mouth.

Kurt’s eyes opened wide. He’s already feeling the pain. Slowly, the white towel began turning red, like a paper slowly getting wet.

"Kurt! KURT!!!" all I can do is to scream out his name. The towels can no longer hold it. Blood gushed from his mouth; he threw it all up on the balcony’s holed floor. Blood dripped to the side of the streets. I’m not sure if he’ll make it.

"No. No. No no no no… Kurt!" Peter yelled. But Kurt continued to throw up blood.

Jenna was outside, kneeling on the floor crying, wishing everything to be over soon. Kurt’s time is almost out. He spewed too much blood; he’ll be losing consciousness soon. Then there was the sound of the door.

Slowly he began to stop moving. We lay him on the floor. He also stopped vomiting blood. His eyes are closing. With his last breathe he looked sideways. I saw his lips move.

"I…love..y…you."

Kurt died.

I looked behind me. It was her. Nona. She came after all, probably worried why Kurt hasn’t called her, or answered her calls. She couldn’t stand looking at Ryder when he died, what more having to witness Kurt. For seconds she just stood there, she fell on her knees. She didn’t say a word, she just hugged Kurt’s lifeless body.

"Nona…we couldn’t…" I don’t know the words to say.

"Nona." Jenna took her hand.

The night was over for Kurt. Right now all that’s in my head is Moss.

***

The whole night I was searching for Moss. I did it myself. Peter had to send Kurt’s body to the morgue; Jenna had to take Nona home. I didn’t find her. I tried to keep the worst from entering my mind, I was just hoping she made it. It’s already the next day, I fell asleep on the couch near the phone.

Right now I couldn’t lose any one else. Three friends have already died, all of them my fault. All I can do now is blame myself. I remembered the look in Ryder’s face when he tries desperately to reach me, trying to get me to help him. It was me he depended on, but I can’t do anything. Same goes for Trevor; he thought I could save him, that’s why it was me he called. And Kurt kept screaming my name before it happened too. Why did this happen? And now I can’t find Moss.

"Deck. It’s me Peter." Peter gave me a call.

"I had some guys at the lab examine your cigarette. Even at that thing they couldn't find any substance, they couldn’t find anything. It’s still a mystery how this thing works."

"Oh... I see. How about Kurt?"

"The guys at the morgue just finished him. All three of them, Ryder and Trevor too."

"It sounds creepy. It sounded like the three of them are just having a trip. It’s sad. I’m sorry Peter."

"Shush, it’s not your fault. Just be glad it’s over. We’ll find Moss eventually."

I know Peter wanted to say ‘we’ll find Moss’ body eventually.’ He just didn’t want to make me feel bad.

"Anyway, meet me up at Zappy’s at 4 ok? Let’s have a chat, ease our mind. I’ll have Jenna come along too."

"Sure." I hung up.

I slept some more since it’s only 11. I looked at my ceiling, my kitchen and my balcony. Ryder and Kurt’s faces keeps on flashing before me, the pain and agony they endure. I thought maybe I should have ended their suffering when I had the chance. Slowly, I dozed off.

I was awakened by a loud knock on the door. It was 3 in the afternoon. Who could it be? I opened it. It was Jeth.

"Hey."

"Hey." I greeted back.

"So Kurt too huh?" he said with a blunt face, then silence.

"Yeah. That speculation I told you about. I was right on target."

"Really? Kurt didn’t make it I supposed. You were a little too late. 3 of our friends now, but that will end at that right?"

"Actually I haven’t seen Moss yet. I don’t want to think of the worst."

"Moss too… How’s Nona doing? How did she take it?"

"Jenna sent her home. I haven’t heard from neither of them. I’m gonna meet them at Zappy’s by four you should come."

"I’ll think about it. I still have to tell Trevor’s folks what happened to him."

"Yeah you’re right. Thanks for taking care of that. Try not to shock them too much."

"Yeah I know."

Jeth stayed a little longer then left after some soda. He took the responsibility of telling Trevor’s parents. I wonder how they will take it. Will they be mad at me? If they do, I probably deserve it. It’s almost about time. I have to get to Zappy’s.

I arrived late. I can already see Peter’s half filled cup of coffee. And Jenna’s fidgeting, anxious to see me. Again that bell on the door caught everyone’s attention. Peter gave me a signal to order something and sit beside Jenna. She looked worried.

"Sorry, I thought I’d be early. I was too lazy to get moving. How’s it doing?" I asked them both.

"I’m worried." Jenna said. "About Moss, and Nona." She added.

"Deck, about Moss. What do you think?" Peter asked.

"I- I really don’t know. But if something happened hen maybe, we’d know right?"

"This sucks." Peter sighed.

We talked for a bit. And I did some calls. I asked Jenna how Nona is doing.

"She’s quiet. She doesn’t speak anything, doesn’t eat anything. She just sits there, then tears will start to come out of her eyes. I feel sad seeing her like that."

"She must have loved him so much."

"Yeah. To think that Kurt died in front of her. And saying his last words."

"Deck…"

"Yeah?!"

"You won’t leave me right? Not like them?"

"It’s over honey. Don’t be silly. Everything’s fine now."

"You’re right. Well, I’m going to check on Nona again. You better have some rest. I and Peter will go back working soon. Let’s all get back on track with our lives."

"It feels like 2 days have been forever with all those weird stuff. Let’s all go to Ryder, Trevor and Kurt’s funeral."

"Ok."

"See ya later Deck" Peter waved a cigarette pack.

"What?! You still don’t quit smoking? After what happened?!"

"Relax, it’s not that weird stuff, Sui Caewhatever. I was tense these days, with all that dying that's happening. Time to sit back, don't let the thing get into your head. If you keep that up, next thing you know you'll be hiding from every cigarette you'll see."

"Fine! Just don’t light it man. I’m serious. Please."

"You’re being paranoid. But fine. Anyway, we’ll catch you later. I have to report to my patients." They went out of Zappy’s while I stayed there trying to think what I will do, what can I do, for those three at least.

I stared at my coffee getting cold, maybe it’s time to go home. I stood up, and surprisingly one waitress couldn’t get her eyes off me. I wonder what she wants. I just left without saying a word.

I went straight home, to try to figure out things calmly. As I unlock the front door of my apartment, I could hear the phone ringing. I almost broke my key trying to unlock the door as fast as I could. Once in, I ran upstairs trying to catch the caller. But as soon as I stepped it, the ringing stopped.

Damn. What if it’s Moss.

Luckily, it rang again. I answered it swiftly. It was the police.

"H-Hello?" I answered nervously.

"Hi. This is Officer Gray from the police department. Is this Mr. Fox?"

"Yes." My heart was beating fast. Why would the police call?

"Are you an acquaintance of Miss Fox? Morrigan Samantha Fox?"

"Y-yeah. She’s my cousin. What happened?" the worst might have come already. Moss… cousin. What will I tell your Parents?

"I have news. We found her. Lying at the city’s outskirts."

"Moss…" my tears began to form. My heart is aching. She didn’t make it after all. The fourth on the death list, my cousin. Moss. But she’s too young. And…

"Deck!"

"Huh?!"

"Deck it’s me! Moss! Sorry. I’ve been trying to contact you since 4, but nobody’s answering. Officer Gray said he’ll give it a try and call you. but once you answered, he didn’t let go, don’t worry, I took it from him."

"Moss! What the?! The officer said you were dead!"

"Huh? No he didn’t, silly, he said I was lying on the outskirts of the city. I was crying and running, I got tired and fainted. They thought I ran away so they called you to report it. I said I’d go home myself but they said I might run away again."

"Damn Moss! You had me worried! Those fucking cops, not telling me what happened directly!"

"I’m safe cuz. That’s what’s important."

"Go home! Right now! Have those cops send you here."

"How’s Kurt, did he make it?"

"N-No. He’s…gone."

"No."

"You've grown Moss, usually you'd cry over a thing like this. Anyway, both of you, you took the cigarette right?"

"Yeah, he lit mine with his. But I didn’t finish it."

"So it wasn’t the cigarette?"

"I’m not sure. It may be possible that because I didn’t finished the cigarette."

"Maybe. But-" I stared blankly into space. Feels like I’m missing something.

"Deck?! You still there?! But what Deck?!"

"Oh, sorry. Listen, I just need you to come home. Just do it okay?! I’ll be home when you get here."

"Oh, Okay." She hung up.

Somehow, after what Moss said to me, I still can’t figure anything out. I went out to scout a bit. Try asking the waitresses at the Diner if they noticed something weird, since there are staring at me suspisciously, and the place where i found that punk can be esen right outside the Diner's window.. All I have is that they smoked cigarettes, Sui Caedere. I rang the door’s bells again. And the same waitress looked at me for the second time, she glanced like she wanted to say something.

"Is there a problem miss?"

"You."

"Huh?"

"You’re that guy that’s here yesterday. That was your girlfriend right?" the waitress said.

Was she talking about when we met boss here, the time I gave him my story? But why did she bother telling me.

"Have you heard the news?"

"What news?"

"That bearded man you are with; he died right after he left here."

"D-Died?! What?! What happened?!"

"No one knows. We were almost shut down for business yesterday. Haven’t you seen that today we have fewer customers? People thought it was because of our food. But you ate here often don’t you?!"

"Food? Why? Did he die of food poisoning?!"

"Apparently no, we were clean; police said they found no substance in the man’s body. Actually, there is nothing to be found, literally."

"No…"

"Yeah, he started coughing up blood; everybody thought he was having a heart attack. Until he bursts, blood oozed from his mouth. Ugh! Creepy! I don’t even want to think about it!"

"But… well, thanks, I better get going." I left her, I can’t even remember if I paid for what I ordered.

My boss died. What the hell is going on? He died, just like the others. Blood show from the mouth, heart attack like symptoms. My boss, died just like that.

My boss is the least of my worries. How come?! I didn’t hand him any Sui Caedere. I saw him smoking a cigarette. But if it was Sui Caedere, I would have noticed the red filter and imprints. This is not making any sense. I thought I have found out the reason why, but things just got more complicated.

I ran out of the store. I didn’t know what to do, I want to warn Peter and Jenna, but warn them about what?! Things are really getting serious. My suspicions haven’t been any clearer. What did my boss and those three did that killed them.

They all smoked but-

"Sorry man." Someone bumped me, apologized immediately. I was hit again. I was deep in thoughts when bam! I'm really getting popuar this way.

"You sick fuck!" I recognized the kid. It was that punk.

"What?! I haven’t done anything you freak!"

"You! You were the boy whom I got that pack of cigarette! You bastard!"

"Shit. You were that hooded man!"

"Tell me what’s that cigarette! Tell me everything dammit!"

"I don’t know I swear!"

"Don’t fuck with me asshole!" I didn’t realized it but I was already raising my fist against him. "Tell me or I’ll wreck your face you piece of trash!"

"It wasn’t mine! Don’t tell the cops! It was a promotional cigarette! I stole it from some guy! I promise I don’t know!"

"Promotional?!"

"Yeah. That cigarette was made for an anti-smoking campaign."

"What?! Three of my friends died because of that pack! What is it! Don’t lie to me punk! I’m warning you!"

"Died?! What do you mean died?!" he nearly can’t speak since I’m almost choking him. "I still have many if you’d like! Me and my friends take it! Please, I can’t breathe!"

"I don’t want anymore! What do you mean you and your friends take it?! What do you mean by ‘the first shot always miss?!"

"You have to expose the stuff before using it, if you use it immediately after opening it, you won’t feel the high. That is why the first stick won’t do! Ack!"

"It’s just an ordinary cigarette?! Then why is that man chasing you?!"

"He’s the one I stole it from, he has to retrieve it or it won’t sell in the market if I spread it out! Please man! That’s all I know!" I let him go slowly. After feeling his neck, he ran off, away from me.

"It wasn’t the cigarette after all. It was just plain cigarette, nothing special. That’s why Peter’s co-workers could find anything strange from it." I whispered to myself. Was it really a disease then?

Ryder smoked one at the balcony, he died at my kitchen. Trevor smoked one at the hospital, died in his porch. Kurt smoked at my balcony, dies at the same place. My boss smoked a different cigarette at the Diner, died on the side of the road. What’s the similarities?! Think Deck! Think.

I ruled out the locations, since they smoked and died in different places. The best shot I’ve got is they all smoked three hours before they died, but then again, Moss is still alive. I can’t say it was because of Sui Caedere since my boss didn’t try it, and Moss survived from it as well. What is it?! Is it the time? Is it the person?! Is it the place?!

And then it hit me. The thing that I was missing.

"Deck! Where are you?!" It was Jenna, she called at my cell just when I thought about it. "I need to see you! Right now!"

"Perfect timing! Me too!"

***

I met up with Jenna at the Park. It was already dark. I have to tell her what I figured out so she can prevent it, since she’s most probably have a high chance of doing it. But what bugs me is why did she want to meet me as well. I came before her, I waited for her at the bench. Then there she was.

"Did you wait long?!" she looked sad, depressed. She’s holding her hand tightly. She was also scared. "Deck…"

"Jenna. Why?! What happened. I’m here." I comforted her.

"Nona. She’s dead."

"What!" Nona, is she going to be a part of this mystery too? She’s dead. But why? "Jenna what happened?! Is it the same as-"

"No deck. She killed herself. She couldn’t handle what happened to Kurt. I entered her room and she slashed her wrist. Deck, why do people around us die?! I’m tired of it. I’m scared."

"Don’t worry Jenna. Stay calm. It’s not anybody’s fault. Look, I have good news anyway. Moss is fine."

"Moss?! Really?!"

"Yeah, she called. She’s still alive."

"But how?! Didn’t she use a cigarette?!"

"Yeah. I thought it was the cigarette… Don’t be surprised, but my boss died as well."

"Y-Your boss?!"

"Yeah, same way as the others. Blood came out of his mouth as well. So I was thinking."

"You mean?! It’s not the cigarette that killed Ryder and the others?! Things are getting more complicated Deck. I can’t understand."

"It wasn’t. If it was, Moss should be dead, and my boss should be alive. I bumped into the punk that gave me the pack, he said it was ordinary cigarettes, a promotional pack, an anti-smoking campaign to scare smokers and make them quit."

"What do you mean?!"

"It wasn’t the place, the person or the time, but it’s related to smoking. It doesn’t matter what you smoke. Jenna, what did my boss do before he smoked?" I asked her.

"He had no lighter so I lent him yours, he even tried to take it but I said you liked that."

"I knew it. It was what you did before, what you lit the cigarette with. Ryder, Trevor, Kurt and my boss. They all lit the cigarettes with the same lighter. The black wind proof lighter you gave me."

"Wha- I-"

"That is why Moss is still alive, she lit her cigarette using Kurt’s already lighted cigarette. Remember when Kurt said Moss wanted to learn that."

"Are you sure Deck?!"

"This time I am. Let’s get rid of that lighter. There must have been some chemicals inside that activates once you ignite it. The fuel maybe, I'm not sure. Where is it?!"

"*gasp*! Deck!"

"Jenna?!"

"Peter has it! He took it after Kurt dropped it when you grabbed him at your apartment! Deck what if-"

"Fuck!" am I too late again this time?! He was waving a pack of cigarettes earlier. Though he promised he won’t light them, I doubt he really wouldn’t. There hasn’t been three hours when we separated. I just hope he didn’t do anything foolish. "Jenna, did he used it after we separated ways?!"

"No, I don’t know. I went to the hospital, he went home."

"Damn. He said he’ll report to his patients. That bastard! We should hurry."

Jenna and I ran for a cab. She doesn’t say it but I know she’s really worried about her brother. Peter’s a good man, he can’t die. Not like that. It will scar both Jenna and I if that would happen. I have to stop this no matter what.


***

We stood in front of Jenna and Peter’s house. It was locked.

"Do you have spare keys Jenna?!" I told her to open the door while I scream out Peter’s name. Hoping he would hear me. I just hope he figured things out on his own. Though I doubt it since he doesn’t know that Moss is alive and my boss is dead.

"It’s open Deck! His room is on the third floor!"

We climb the stairs as fast as our feet could. Heart beats of my own, I can hear them. Please be safe Peter…

…

"No!" Jenna cried.

Looks like it’s all over.

We didn’t make it in time. We were too late. His room’s door is closed, but we didn’t have to open it to find out. Blood has leaked out of the door’s opening underneath. We could still hear the TV, it was on. Peter, he was watching TV when it happened.

"Don’t come in Jenna." I told her. It’s not like she can anyway. She just dropped on the floor at the side of the door, near Peter’s blood. She was crying like she never cried before.

I twist the knob. Try to see Peter one last time. I can’t believe I was crying, I tried not too, but it felt hard, I felt pain in my chest. Is this what Peter felt when he was dying? No, perhaps a lot more painful. The door slowly creaked open. I was walking in pure blood, Peter’s blood. He was sitting on a chair; his back towards the door. He was watching something. I saw what was on, and there I could not help it any longer. I cried, burst into tears. And even though I am, it still hurts. What happened, why Peter.

It was us. Kurt and Nona kissing, while Trevor teases them, he flicks the camera over to himself, making faces and sounds. Then it was Peter’s voice in the background, telling him to stop. But Trevor didn’t, he filmed me and Jenna talking at one side, then Ryder with his hair still straight, not in locks. Moss was there too, running with sodas. Everyone was lively, it was before any of us learned to smoke. It was our student days. The one Trevor caught on tape. The days we were full of life, enjoying our youth. The days, all of them are still here.

I was wrecked, my heart crushed.

Peter did want to watch them. He didn’t even tried to struggle while in pain. He wanted to die like that, watching our old memories. Did he know what was going to happen?

It was funny, Peter’s dead, but he’s still smiling, like he just fell asleep while watching the film. Or our memories took the pain away, that no matter what happens, even if you die, you can always look at the good times and laugh about everything.

"Peter…"

***

I got out of Peter’s room and hugged Jenna. She’s more wrecked than I am. I don’t know what to say. But things have to be clear. Right here right now.

"Jenna. I’m sorry…" I hugged her even tighter.

"Peter….Deck, Peter’s…" She couldn't control her tears.

"Jenna. I know this is not the right time. But I have to ask you this."

"…"

"Where did you got that lighter?!"

"What?!"

"The black lighter? We have to get back what those people who made this lighter took from us. Our friends, your brother."

"I don’t understand you."

"Jenna! The lighter you gave me as present! The one in the box!"

"Deck! My brother just died! You don’t make any sense! Stop this little game! All of our friends are dead! Dead Deck! Dead!"

"Jenna you have to remember!"

"Deck! I only gave you a pack of Marlboro!"

"No! There was a lighter inside! Ask Jeth! He saw it when I opened the box!"

"What?! Deck! Who’s Jeth?!"

"Jeth, my bestfriend!"

"Deck! Peter is your bestfriend! You’ve always been together since college! What's wrong with you?!" she forcefully wiped her tears. You’ve been like that since the party! Also at the time Trevor died, you walked away from me and started talking to air! I stared at you, you just looked back!"

"What? I don’t…" this time i really don't know what's going on. "Jenna, this is impossible! You know Jeth! I know you know him! You must have known him! He walked Kurt and Nona home after Ryder died! He was at the party! He was even there when Trevor died, Peter even called him! Jenna please! He even volunteered to tell Trevor’s parents that he was dead!"

"Deck! Listen to yourself! You’re talking crazy! You’re the one that walked Kurt and Nona out of the house!" she was pointing a straight finger at me. "It was only you that Peter called when Trevor died! Deck! Get a grip!" She cried even louder.

"What?!"

"Deck, you were in front of us when you made a call and told Trevor’s parents about him! It was all you! Deck please. I have no time for this. I want to be alone for a while. You’re not helping." Jenna wiped her tears, slowly stood up and left the house.

I wanted to follow her, but something is stopping me. What did she mean by all of that? That she didn’t give me a lighter? And that I was the one who walked Kurt and Nona, the only one Peter called when Trevor died? Maybe that’s why I remembered calling someone when we were at Zappy’s but forgot who it was. Jenna…she…she doesn’t know Jeth.

"Jeth…"

"Yes?!" a familiar voice came from behind. It was him. "I heard you calling for me."

"Jeth! Where did you come from? Where did you go?!"

"Me? Go? I never left Deck. I was always here." He points at my head.

"Fuck!"

"What fuck?! After everything we’ve been through, you’re saying fuck?!"

"You… you don’t"

"Well, your girlfriend is right. I really don't."

"You don't...exist."

It all came to me at once.

I was trembling... "Back at the alley after I got the pack of cigarette, I thought you crept from behind, but there was no one after all. That silly smile of yours while sitting on the couch, while Ryder was dying! No wonder no body cares about ‘Jeth’, or even bother asking for your help when some one’s dying! Also that time when Peter never mentioned you when Trevor asked how is everyone doing, that time at the hospital. You suddenly disappeared when Kurt died; You weren’t actually there when somebody’s dying. Not in Ryder, Trevor or Kurt. And no wonder you knew everything…"

"Because I was you. Don’t you wonder why the paramedics thanked you for sharing your statements? Though you don’t remember it right? Because I did it all..."

"You!… You’re the one that gave me the lighter, not Jenna. You made it look like it was a gift from her!"

"Oh you mean this lighter?!" He drew the lighter out from his pocket. He ignited it.

"You bastard! You killed all of them!"

"I told you I’ll handle Trevor didn’t I? Back at your party when he’s so drunk!"

"You killed them." I was furious.

"No Deck. We did."

"No…."

"This lighter, you want to know how?!"

"I don’t believe you."

"This fire, it is your rage. Your anger that killed your friends. The one who ignites it, ignites you anger. Your rage killed them Deck."

"What are you talking about! I don’t hate any of them!"

"Oh really? Aren’t you mad at Ryder since he’s always hitting on Moss? And Trevor because he was always a baby, so irritating? And Kurt, having a perfect relationship with Nona, that made you worthless in Jenna’s eyes? And weren’t you glad your fucked up boss isn’t around anymore? That’s what he gets for not buying his own fucking lighter."

"No! no!"

"Face it Deck."

"But Peter…"

"Oh Peter… that was actually nothing, I just want him dead since he’s so smart and almost figured out that everything was about the lighter. It was funny, you thought it was the cigarette. Hahahah!"

"Fuck you!"

"Ah… before you do anything rash. Have you asked yourself? Did Jenna ever touched this lighter?"

"Fuck if she did she could have died a long time ago. And I don’t have any anger towards her! Fuck off demon!"

"Well, you WERE right bout the three hours, I have to hand it to you. But I only like to make it three hours so it would sound interesting. I can actually make her vomit blood right now!"

"Don’t you dare!"

"I'm kidding. I know what you hate most, but also know what you love most. Your enemy is my enemy, what's dear to you, is dear to me as well. I AM you after all. *sigh*, I had fun Deck. Make some more friends, for me to kill okay?! I mean, for us." He walked out the door. I chased him, but as soon as the door closed, I opened it. I was alone.

I smirked...

"No wonder I didn’t saw him in the video…"

***
It has been a week since everything that had happened. I never saw, heard, or felt Jeth since that day. I don't know if i'll be glad or not.
It was morning. I gave Jenna a call.

"I’m safe Deck. Clear your head. I don’t think we should see each other for a while. Say hi to Moss for me. I had Peter's funeral ready. I decided to have him bury by tomorrow, you can come if you want. But call me first. I don't think i can see you yet. Take care of yourself, love you. Bye." That was all she said.

Moss came back to the house, though I advised her to stay at her folk’s house for a while. She would be able to forget everything if she’s there. I still can’t believe that Jeth didn’t exist. My leave is almost over. But what the heck, my boss is dead. Who’s gonna fire me? Fire… that lighter. Why is it still here? It’s mocking me from that table. I wonder how it felt.

In a week I haven’t smoked anything. I missed the smoke. Maybe this would be the best time. I can hear the paper burning.

I lit a cigarette.

I watched the same film, Peter did.

I finished it all in 3 hours.

Funny…my chest hurts.

-The End

"Sui Caedere"

By : Deck Fox

P.S. – This was the story Boss asked me to do while on leave. But he’s dead now. So to who ever may receive this, you may not be able to see me anymore. Please deposit all my salary to Jenna Kaye Adams. And please tell my cousin, Morrigan Samantha Fox, also known as Moss, to stay away from my stuff. Thanks.

CopyrightMAY2009
AndrewRafaelBorja Publishing.
Signed:

D.Fox
Deck Fox