Strange Cat Behaviors

It has been a unanimously accepted fact that no one can choose a cat as a pet - it is the cat that chooses her owner. How can anyone mess with such an imperial command? But despite her no-nonsense aura, she can indeed drop her scepter of intelligence and produce humor, if she thus wishes. Below, with due respect to her majesty (lest she brings out her sheathed claws), I list some of her more humorous and strange behaviors:

Meowing All Night for No Apparent Reason
Cats have an unusual knack to annoy humans without even trying. Meowing all night can be categorized as attention seeking behavior. She is only trying to get herself a nocturnal companion for her midnight adventures; it is surely not her fault that you keep falling for it. It is for us to remember, that she can indeed be very vocal if keeping us awake all night is high on her agenda. It is best not to piss her off during the day, this will keep her sane during the nights.

Loud Play During the Night
I keep wondering why my cat decides to play with noisy toys, especially if they are the same one's she studiously ignored all day long. I think it is a 'cat thing', something the cats do just for us to know that there is nothing we can make her do - she shall only do what she wants. Sometimes I just sit awake on my bed and curse myself for getting them - the toys, not the cats, duh!

Night-time Escapades
Though I keep a close eye on her, I get caught completely off-guard when I wake up sometime during the night to find her gone. Whoosh! She has disappeared into thin air, without a trace. How she goes off stealthily, where she goes and what she does, I will never find out, but I am sure she will always be back the next day, to her feeding bowl, with her smug grin. Cats are crepuscular (so I've been told by the vet) which basically translates to 'let her do what she likes between dusk and dawn'.

Pushing Things off the Table
My cat knew what's good for her. She stopped this misbehavior soon after the first few smacks. She is indeed smart, didn't I tell you? But, other less well-behaved cats, do have a tendency to push things off the table. They either like loud banging sounds or they just want the owners to notice them Either way, they tend to achieve both anyway.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Some cats show obsessive tendencies towards some hilarious past-times. Tail chewing (Animal Planet's famous 'round and round cat' laugh), excessive licking, wool gathering (oops, I meant wool pulling!) and fur scratching are just some of them. I have always wondered what fascinates them in a ball of wool, or a Persian carpet, but came up blank. If you have the answers however, please be sure to let me know.

Inexplicable Behavioral Patterns
Scratching expensive furniture, rolling over on the back, rubbing faces against things and scratching reflective surfaces are some really weird incomprehensible cat behaviors. My cat just tops it with stealing, unrolling and generally making a wet mess out of toilet paper, tearing up valuable possessions (like my leather handbag and my husband's favorite wallet) and sharpening her claws on my sofa. I always have a feeling that my cat believes that I earn a good salary. Will someone go and tell her the truth please!

Acting as if They Heard Something
My cat likes to feel self important by telling me she heard something. She acts all genuine, pulls up her ears, acts alert and all that, while I wonder if I am actually going deaf. My vet tells me not to worry though because she can hear the ultra-sonic sounds that I cannot. He left me with strict instructions to see a psychiatrist for the time when I start hearing the things that she doesn't.

Licking and Eating
My cat can eat anything but she's definitely selective about the licking. Thank God for all his small mercies! They say, a cat licks herself before a storm. As bizarre as that sounds, it is actually true. Leonore Fleischer has explained the reason for this in her book 'The Cat's Pajamas'. She says that an electrical storm generates static electricity in the atmosphere, making dirt particles to stick to the cat's dry fur. It makes perfect sense for the cat to clean up after that, doesn't it?

Eating Grass and Plants
Sometimes you may see your cat eating grass or plants in your garden, although that's not her regular food. Strange, right? But don't worry, grass or plants act as laxatives for constipated cats and sometimes they consume it in order to vomit hair or undigested food. My cat also eats grass, when she can't digest foods easily. If you notice such a behavior in your cat, don't ignore it and immediately take her to the vet to rule out other digestion-related issues.

There is so much more to write, I think I'd end up with a thesis. I think I should leave the hissing, growling, biting, nibbling ears and pouncing on invisible objects for my next article. I just leave you with one thought, that every cat owner experiences but does not own up to. My cat just lazes around on the couch and surveys everything I do with semi-bored eyes, while I try to make myself somehow invisible, so I wouldn't have to bow down to the high and mighty. Does your cat actually do the same?