Self-esteem in Children

Self-esteem is not a quality that can be expressed in words. It is a quality which should be visible through your personality and behavior. Self-esteem means being comfortable with yourself and accepting the person inside you. You must be proud of the good within yourself and also be aware of the bad within you. It's all about liking yourself. Wondering how can a person not like himself? Just think about some people you know; are they completely happy? They are not happy about some or the other aspect of themselves. Some are unhappy about their looks, some want more money, some want another job, some wish to change their career path while some are unhappy with their family relationships. These people have low self-esteem. What about self-esteem in children? You as a parent should remember the above things and take care that you nurture your child in the right way. It is your responsibility that he/she does not end up being one in a crowd of children with self-esteem issues.

A child having self-esteem is creative, happy, active and has more confidence. Which parents won't like to watch their children to be like this? Children derive confidence about themselves from the way they are treated, mostly by their parents. You play the important role of giving them a sense of self-worth.

Building Self-esteem in Children

Love your Children for Who They Are
Always trying to point out mistakes in your children will make them feel very low. Remember to encourage them for their smallest achievements. Stop blaming them unnecessarily, thinking that this will make them more perfect. As you point out their mistakes, get into the habit of pointing out their good qualities as well. Everyone has some minus points; help your children to overcome those. Try to find the best in them and also make them realize about their plus points. Don't blame them if they lack some qualities, instead try to enhance the qualities they possess.

Give them Solutions: Show the Right Way
You definitely need to point out the mistakes to your children, but in a proper manner. Point out their mistakes and tell them the reason behind calling it a 'mistake'. Many a time, things that are wrong according to you would be perfectly right according to your children. Tell them the right way. Also, encourage them to perform the same activity again, it's like giving them another chance and hence, showing the confidence that they will do it right this time.

Do Not Compare
As you hate comparisons, so do your children. Many a time, people compare their children with his/her classmates, neighbors or buddies in terms of exam grades, homework completion, general habits, etc. Mind well, that this is the most dangerous thing you are doing to your child. Though young, he/she will understand that this is wrong and feel the unsatisfactoriness within you towards them.

Give Importance to School but Don't Make a Hype
Many parents and teachers believe that school is the only thing in the life of a child. Stop making hype of their homework and exams. Many times children end up doing the homework just for the sake of completing it. Tell them the importance of homework and the right way to complete it in time. Let them decide the time for their studies. Don't force a schedule over them that is made by you. This will hamper your child's development.

Give them Importance
Always saying, 'what do you know, you are young' is unhealthy for your children. Listen to them, learn to understand them and give them enough of your time. Respect their likes and dislikes as you expect them to respect yours. You can ask for their opinion in some things related or not related to them. This will make them feel that they are a part of the family and their views and choices are given importance and value.

Take the Pressure Off
Your children may be under pressure due to many reason like exams, illness, performance, fights with buddies, etc. Try to take off their pressure by discussing the issue with them. Talk to them and make them feel comfortable and relaxed so that they feel secured to share their problems with you.

Indulge your children in some group activities. Games, scouting, dancing are some activities for children with low self-esteem. But, consider the likes and interests of your children and accordingly decide the activity for them. Understanding your children well is a primary responsibility for building self-esteem in children.