Pun Examples

The English language is full of different figures of speech which add to its beauty. One such figure of speech example is a pun. A pun is a type of word play wherein one word has two meanings. This gives an ambiguity to the sentence which is purposely added for a humorous or rhetorical effect.

Puns for Kids

• A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
• A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.
• At a hearing aid center: 'Let us give you some sound advice.'
• I wanted to be a stenographer, but they told me they are not short-handed at the moment.
• Without geometry, life is pointless.
• Dieting is a matter of life and breadth.
• I considered going into the ministry but I didn't have an altar ego.
• Speaking ill of the dead is a grave mistake.
• At a pizza shop: 7 days without pizza makes one weak.
• On a Scientist's door: Gone Fission.
• At the electric company: We would be delighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't, you will be.
• Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain during root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
• A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge".

Funny Puns

• Did you hear about the optometrist who fell into a lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself?
• Doctors tell us there are over seven million people who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.
• Old electricians never die, they just lose contact.
• There were two ships. One had red paint, one had blue paint. They collided. At last report, the survivors were marooned.
• I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him $50 that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No, the steaks are too high."
• I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way.
• Old investors never die, they just roll over.
• Old laser physicists never die, they just become incoherent.
• This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. "Four bucks," says the bartender. "Put it on my bill."
• Old limbo dancers never die, they just go under.
• Old number theorists never die, they just get past their prime.
• Two peanuts walk into a bar. One was a salted.

Cool Examples of Pun

• Old owls never die, they just don't give a hoot.
• I went to a seafood disco rave last week and pulled a mussel.
• I was on an elevator the other day, and the operator kept calling me "son". I said, "Why do you call me 'son'? You're not my father." He said, "I brought you up, didn't I?"
• Which president was least guilty? Lincoln. He is in a cent.
• Old seers never die, they just lose their vision.
• Diet slogan: Are you going the wrong weigh?
• Old steelmakers never die, they just lose their temper.
• Old students never die, they just get degraded.
• Old tanners never die, they just go into hiding.
• What did the coach say to his losing team of snakes? You can't venom all.

Famous Puns

• I used to look for gold, but it didn't pan out.
• I used to be a banker, but lost interest in the work.
• I used to be a baker, but I didn't make enough dough.
• I used to be a blackjack host, but was offered a better deal.
• I used to work for Budweiser, but then I got canned.
• I used to be a butler, but found the work wasn't my cup of tea.
• I used to be a carpenter, but then I got bored.
• I used to be a doctor, but then I lost patients.
• I used to be a hotel clerk, but then I had reservations.
• I used to be a marathon runner, but couldn't stand the agony of de feet.
• I used to be a railroad conductor, but my boss found out I wasn't trained.
• I used to be a road digger, but I got re-trenched.
• I used to be a sanitation engineer, but the city dumped me.
• I used to sell computer parts, but then I lost my drive.
• I used to be a taxi driver, but found I couldn't hack it.
• I used to be a teacher, but found I didn't have enough class.
• I used to be a tennis instructor, but it just wasn't my racket.
• I used to be a train driver but I got sidetracked.
• I used to be a transplant surgeon, but my heart just wasn't in it.
• I used to be a Velcro salesman, but couldn't stick with it.

There aren't really one word puns examples, as a pun almost always needs to be said in a context so as to create a word play. So, I hope these puns made you smile because a good pun is its own reword!