Please Call Me

Not again
It can’t be.
I thought it was all over,
I thought I was free.

A dark room
Somewhere unknown, but familiar
Have I been here before?
It seems the same, yet different.
I feel so cold
The covers don’t seem to help

Half of you will think it’s a story.
The other half will think it’s true.
Which is the right answer?
Which half are you?

Ring, please ring
I can’t stand the silence
Don’t leave me in the dark
Where are you?

There’s service, no doubt
The minutes keep ticking by
No ring yet
It leaves me wondering why

What did I do this time?
I'm sorry, I really am
Is it my fault?
Tell me what I did.

I can’t take it anymore
Everyone’s asleep
Nothing will stop me
How far this time?

I walk over to the dresser
The candles all perfect in line
I reach out for the green one
This little secret of mine.

No, you can’t a voice shouts at me
It will ring you know it
But what if it doesn’t
There’s no making up my mind.

Should I?
Maybe I shouldn’t?
Just a couple of marks
No, wait, I couldn’t.

The candle only makes it to the end of the dresser
Real tears start to fall
Sit on the bed I shout at myself
My body won’t listen.

On my knees
Something’s being said
The voices get louder
My head falls to the bed

Too many thoughts at once
I can’t single one out to think about
Everything happens for a reason
You can beat this

I pull myself up
My heart starts to slow
Thoughts become more clear
Making it easier to know

I reach for the candle again
Tilting it just enough to see the top
All dusty, though I can still see
Sticking deep in the wax, shiny and sharp

Placing it back into its little row
I beat it once again
That addicting mark
I will not let it win.