Pitfalls in Building Relationships, Commitment, and Love - Continuing with I

We continue this series which discusses how to avoid the pitfalls in building interpersonal relationships, whether with family, coworkers, friends, or that special someone. Committed, loving relationships do not just happen. You should realize that there is no success secret, no checklist of things to do, and just as important things not to do for building such relationships. We will make some suggestions that focus on what to avoid. We actually have a double series of articles for the letter I. Our present focus is on impolite, indifferent, and infallible.

I is for impolite. Impoliteness is a real scourge of present-day life. How hard is it to wait an extra ten seconds to hold the door open for someone surrounded by little kids? What is the difference between the Gay Nineties and today? In the Gay Nineties a woman might drop her handkerchief and a man would scoop it up. Sometimes this was the beginning of a beautiful relationship. Today a woman might drop her Kleenex (does anyone use a handkerchief anymore?). And a man, perhaps willing to start a beautiful relationship, would bend down to scoop it up only to hear a shrill voice: "No, thank you. I’ll get it myself. Male chauvinist pig.

I is for indifferent. Our unnamed and probably nonexistent handkerchief dropper of the previous paragraph may be accused of many faults, but no one could say that she was indifferent. To some extent be like her; don’t be indifferent. Do you see that bump on the log? Which bump on the log? Any bump on any log. Don’t be a bump on a log; don’t be indifferent. Be involved. You can make a difference and it does make a difference. People can know that you have been there and I’m not talking about the morning you forgot the deodorant. Making it happen is contagious.

I is for infallible. Conjugate infallible. I am not infallible. You are not infallible. He or she is not infallible. Get the idea. We are not… Mistakes happen. The only way to avoid making mistakes is to do nothing. When you think about it, doing nothing is one of the biggest mistakes of all. I personally would not use a service that claimed to provide a success rate for doctors or surgeons. The way I look at it, some doctors and surgeons would avoid the most difficult cases to keep their percentage up. I would prefer taking the chance with a practitioner ready to attempt the difficult cases than to go with an infallible scaredy-cat.

Are you tired of all this negativity? Take a look at our companion series that accentuates the positive.