Phases of Studying (Revised Edition)

You are probably bored with the title, however it is a Revised Edition. We people from the 21st century always wanted to be different that our evolution rate is slightly faster than the normal speed. When all the geeks and the nerds used to wear thick glasses and studded their teeth with braces ten years ago, our version of smarty-pants today is just a typical person who looks and acts like everyone else though actually, he is carrying the whole encyclopedia in his personalized storage device called ‘The Brain’.

Studying is a process. There are steps that should be strictly followed. Decades ago, students used to bury their faces into torture devices, also called books, and burn their brows until midnight just to study for an exam the next day. In this modern time, students have developed a whole new method on how to study…err…ineffectively. And here are the Phases of Studying:

PHASE 1: Proper Studying Position

You turn on your study lamp, sit straight, and grab a book. Everything starts from basic, so students nowadays begin from the old-school way of studying. With a notebook on your left side and a pen on the right hand, you are very much ready for note-taking.

PHASE 2: The Slouch Potato

A little slouching wouldn’t hurt your study habits, so you dropped the Proper Studying Position and indulged into the other side. Your hands still have enough strength to continue writing, but you have slowed down. From 1 topic per 15 minutes rate, it dramatically dropped to 1 paragraph per 15 minutes.
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PHASE 3: Stuck in Replay

Maybe taking notes while reviewing wasn’t really a good idea (that’s your alibi) so you stopped writing and focused on reading the chapter alone. First few paragraphs, hmm…this is a good technique. You fully understand what you read like the words are copy-pasted from the book to your head. But after sometime, have you noticed you’ve been reading the same phrase for the whole minute?

PHASE 4: Pseudo-Sleeping Method

Your eyeballs became too heavy for you to open…but you have to continue studying! Thinking of a more effective way to wake you up, a brilliant idea popped inside your head—the Pseudo-Sleeping Method. As the title suggests, you will be imitating the conditions of sleeping: (1) lying on the bed with your head on the pillow; & (2) occasional 5 minute naps. But the twist is you are reading your book. At the same time sleeping. Now try that.

PHASE 5: Wake Me up When Study Period Ends

The PSM requires a great a deal of skill in Multi-tasking so if you find it ineffective, well maybe you need more practice on that. Having no other choice, you ask a favor from your ever beloved roommate to wake you up by 9:30 pm. Let’s say you are too high above the heavens for her to pop you tiny dozing bubble…you slept all the way until 6 am.

PHASE 6: Cramming Frenzy

You wake up in the morning with a big smile on your face. You had a very good sleep last night, now you’re ready for a new day. But wait…did you just say you’re ready for today? Let’s reset. You woke up with a start, intoxicated with the fact that you still have to read 5 more chapters and memorize all the equations for your long exam. Here comes the crammer, the studios-looking guy who brings his notebook to the canteen and yells formulas out loud [which makes you look like a geek]. But the truth is, you were just cramming. The End.

Guilty? Or are you in constant denial? Did you just say no again? Well, wake up. Face it. You are studying INEFFECTIVELY. Those six phases will never help you get good or better grades. Maybe cramming is one instant remedy for an unfinished project, but making it a habit is a big no-no if you are studying in a mind churning school like Philippine Science High School. Now make another revision of this revised edition, a version that will lead you to the right way. ;)