Perfectionism and Its Flaws

The world today complains all the time about the new trend that governs it: superficiality. The majority is no longer concerned with high values, and a properly well done job can scarcely be found. On the opposite extreme, there is perfectionism. Though at a first glance perfectionism may seem as a wanted personality trait, studies have shown that this way of thinking and acting brings altogether a series of deleterious effects, including serious cognitive biases such as rumination, generalization of failures, stable and internal attributions, strong focus on mistakes and the tendency to interpret the ambiguous feedback as being negative or critical.

Hewit and Flett, two prodigious psychologists, developed the Tripartite Model of Perfectionism. It refers to the three types of perfectionism that can be encountered among people.

The Self Oriented Perfectionism

The first type represents a strong internal motivation to be powerful and to set high and unrealistic standards for the self. The good part of it has a number of advantages. Being a self oriented perfectionist triggers all the cognitive and emotional resources to focus around the completion of a target or the reaching of a goal. This kind of person always seems to have resources and he is always available to work hard. These resources are especially activated when the person feels the threat of failure, threat coming from the possibility of not reaching the high set goals. So, in order to compensate the negative effects, the person tries harder and harder to focus and give full resources for a certain task. The problem is that all these above presented advantages come together with serious problems which many tend to neglect. Self oriented perfectionism negatively correlates with unconditional self-acceptance and to toleration to failure. This means that this kind of person always has work hard in order to gain self-esteem. When failure-which is a part of the human life-occurs, self oriented perfectionists generalize their own person as being incapable and unworthy, and therefore they are highly exposed to depression and eventually to suicidal ideation. Moreover, the stress of working without ceasing with the full capacity of resources generates a serious amount of stress, leading afterward to organic issues, such as coronary diseases.

Socially Prescribed Perfectionism

The second type is way less adaptive than the first form presented in the Tripartite Model and it is strongly associated with depression, suicidal ideation, anxiety and stress. The persons who develop this kind of perfectionism live all their life trying to please and not let down the others. They need to do everything perfect in order to gain approval from those surrounding them. The problem is that they wear themselves out in order to be and do what others expect. They feel good about themselves only when they reach the goals set by others and because this is so hard to happen, they are suffering from self-downing and the lack of unconditional acceptance, which eventually leads to depression. Another problem is that they are extremely sensitive to the feedback they receive. If it is ambiguous they perceive it as being negative or critical. They negatively respond to both ambiguous and negative feedback, becoming full of stress and anxiety. Unlike the self oriented perfectionists who work harder in response to the threat of failure, the socially prescribed perfectionists inhibit all their behavior and tend to withdraw from the social environment.

Others Oriented Perfectionism

The third type refers to those persons who accept the others and give them credit only if they are and do perfect everything they are demanded. These perfectionists tolerate no failures or errors from the others. They have a low tolerance to frustration and they under appreciate the others, eventually leading to fury and to relationships heaving a very low quality.

In conclusion, perfectionism has only a few advantages, but generates serious problems with self and with the others. Those who find perfectionism, under every of the above presented forms, as a personality trait are recommended to take measures in order to learn to accept themselves and others unconditionally and to learn to change the biased way of thinking with more logical and functional cognitive schemas.