Passive Aggressive Traits

In simple words, passive aggressive trait is defined as the passive, moderatist resistance to meet the expectations in professional and interpersonal situations. You can call it a negativistic personality trait, that is tagged by a pervasive pattern of pessimism and inactiveness.

What are the Indications of Passive Aggressive Personality

• Passive aggressive traits in men are generally seen as a procrastinate approach towards the task assigned to them. They have a careless attitude towards deadlines. They follow their own time schedule and routines, without caring for those who want their work to be done in a different way or at least on time.
• Passive aggressive people often feel themselves to be oppressed by others. According to them, they are the innocent victims of other's unfair treatments. The matter gets even worse when they find people around them upset because of their behavior.
• A common symptom that is noticed in people who display passive aggressive behavior that they keep devising ways to catch others attention. For example, they hardly come on time to any party, social gathering or even a date. They want others to wait for them and give them importance.
• It is observed that passive aggressive people often indulge in fights with their near and dear ones. They, actually, invent ways to start quarrels with a close friend or a relative. This is because, they fear intimacy. They are afraid of getting too intimate with others.
• Passive aggressive traits in women and children is marked by a fear of taking responsibilities and incumbency. They want to live their lives on their own terms and want to be actually free from any sort of boundedness and subjection. You will often find them making excuses for not completing any task with their forgetfulness and weak memory.
• Another common fear shown by passive aggressive people is the dread of dependency on others. In order to beat such trepidation, they try to control and command others.
• Ambiguous behavior is again a common passive aggressive trait. Sometimes, it is difficult to understand the meaning or significance of their speech and behavior.
• People with passive aggressive personality rarely hold themselves responsible for any wrong deed that they actually have done. Most of the time, they are found to blame others for the things that go wrong because of them. And the worse, they want others to be punished for their baseless obligations.
• People with passive aggressive traits are found switching between hostile rebelliousness and contrition. They keep on making exaggerated and persistent complaints of their misfortune. They are often sullen and argumentative.

What is the Cause for Passive Aggressive Traits Development
According to Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, passive aggressive traits is not considered as a personality disorder. But surely, it is a problem in itself. It not only gives a self-defeating feeling to the sufferers, but also makes them hurt others around. There can be a number of causes behind the development of passive aggressive traits in individuals. The most probable one is the growing up in a family or social atmosphere, where not much importance is given to an individual's needs and wants, where expressing personal desires is not accepted and is taken as a selfish and self-centered nature. Such an upbringing, plants a subconscious feeling in the individuals, like desiring something which they want is unfair and unacceptable. In such situations, children contrive to protect the relationship with their family members and friends which they cannot afford to jeopardize.

How can You Help a Passive Aggressive Person
If you find the symptoms of passive aggressive traits in any of your friends, family members, or children, there is something that you can do to help them come out of this sub-conscious complex. However, I would like to mention that the suggestions cited here are effective, and have assisted a number of people which help the sufferers to recover from passive aggressive behavior to a great extent, but has no guarantee. The reason is that every individual's mind set and psychology is unique and no set rules can produce a similar effect on them. Treating passive aggressive traits mean changing or completely removing the impressions deep embedded in one's subconscious. Still, you can give it a try.

• According to psychologists, you need to understand that a passive aggressive person is actually dealing with a psychological aggression within him and at the same time trying hard to protect you from his hostility. A feasible idea is to not give him any chance to get belligerent.
• Avoid taking a domineering role with a person displaying passive aggressive traits. You will only make the condition worse with unnecessary stress and conflict. Instead try to give him the opportunity to make decisions and plans. Suggest him some options and let him choose on his own.
• A passive aggressive person does not want to take any responsibility and commitment. You should realize it. Try to avoid those situations where you depend on him for an important piece of work to be done from his side. Give him all the possible opportunities to live a free life, as per his definition of freedom. Let him live on his own terms.

Your getting annoyed by the passive aggressive traits sufferer's lateness, inefficiency, forgetfulness and offensive behavior is accepted and understood. Still, to help improve the condition you need to inculcate a patient, calm and affectionate attitude towards him. Give him some time and opportunity to recover and lead a satisfied and pleasant life.