Once You Cross the Ocean Part 5

Living without Natalia was like not living at all. In the next weeks I sat alone inside the room and waited for the clients to enter and pay for sex. I was so weak and frequently would throw up during the sex, which obviously it was the reason why I have been beaten more often. I have felt my stomach growing and new it was nearly the time when the pimps will find out that I was pregnant. I knew it was the cruel thing to say but I wished to miscarriage. I knew there was no way I was going to give the birth to this child. It seemed like the more days have been passing from Natalia’s death, the more I become a drug addict. There was no point of me living anymore. I knew there was no way I will get out of here. I needed to pay my debt first therefore I have noticed that someone was frequently stealing the money I have earned from selling my body. It was an endless job I had to survive.

Sometimes I gave myself a moment to wonder how much evil must there be in people to do such a thing. To kill or keep the innocent people like me in a cage and force to sell their bodies just to make money for them. It was unacceptable.
Sometimes I didn’t control my feelings. Sometimes I took too much drugs that I didn’t remembered what I did on the next day. It was the only way I could give myself some rest. But I have never stopped praying to God. I never did.
I was praying for the rescue as well as I was praying for countless amounts of people who have been forced to become victims of sex trafficking and commercial exploitation. For the people whose life have been shattered and destroyed like mine.
Now I knew how they have felt when they have been trafficked to unknown and put to do something they wouldn’t otherwise do.

I don’t know if the God decided that I have suffered a lot or have responded on my praying but one day the miracle have happened.
The same night I had a dream that Blessed Virgin Mary has entered the brothel I was trapped in. Seeing her I couldn’t stand up. Lying on the bed I cried to her to let me die. I saw no point of living anymore. Entering my room she stopped walking and when I've looked at her she gave me a blessed smile. I knew she came back to take me with her to piece. I wanted to ask her "why do I suffer like this?" but I was in too much shock .
She came closer to me and keeled down.

"It’s not the time for you" She said and disappeared. I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. I tried to understand her words. I did. The hope I was waiting for so long. At the same time I was awoken by noise coming from outside the room. I couldn’t speak or stand up to see what was happening. I felt like I was dying. I couldn’t control myself. My hands and body were shaking nervously. I saw a few Thai guys in a black cap and uniform . I got scared.
"Police. We came to rescue you " They said. I was free. I was taken along with the other trafficked girls.

First thing they did, was to take me to the hospital. I don’t remember much about what has happened after that as it turns out that I overdose drugs, the pimps gave me a night before so I was very close to die that day. I don’t know if I can call it luck. For the past year and a half I have suffered more than any other human being. I still feel terribly sad thinking that there are more than millions of girls trapped like I used to be.
I thought I died that night. I really did. Instead of the day after I opened my eyes and woke up in a hospital. I couldn’t imagine how comfortable the bed was at last. At first it was hard to get used to that I was finally free and safe. I still didn’t quite understood what was going on around me and was frightened that I will have to go back to brothel. One of the nurse said that it was normal. I have been trafficked and suffered the violence and sexual exploitation for a long time and it will take a while till I get back to normal. She also said that I was lucky enough to survive. The only big question mark that has remained was the pregnancy.

One day later the police came back to check on me. For the first time in my life I felt safe. I knew I was. They have said that my father whom reported me missing was on the way from England to see me. I felt so happy. I have never thought that this will happen to me. I was so glad that I was out of their reach.