Obsessive Love Treatment

"A mighty pain to love it is,
And 'tis a pain that pain to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain
It is to love, but love in vain."

- Abraham Cowley

Love, they say, is a wonderful emotion. The coming together of two hearts to beat as one. The mutual liking between two people and a promise, to keep each other happy. At least for most people. For others, it's an obsession. What happens when a simple feeling of mutual liking becomes a manic desire to possess? Why does it happen? And what to do when it happens? Ladies and gentlemen, I am referring to what is commonly known as obsessive love disorder. Are you obsessed with a person? Do you stalk that person everywhere you go? Do you bear resentment with their girlfriend/boyfriend? Or if you are in a relationship, do you have a constant feeling of insecurity or jealousy, that your lover is going to leave you? Well these are some of the telltale signs of the obsessive love disorder and obsessive behavior in relationships.

It is not very clear when an emotion stops being 'love' and starts becoming an obsession. Many a time, it's in the nature of a person to be obsessive. For example, a person who has an obsessive compulsive disorder or an obsessive compulsive personality disorder, will also have an obsessive love disorder. But one thing is for sure. If you are an obsessive lover, or your partner is an obsessive lover, or there is an obsessive lover stalking you, you are in for a lot of trouble.

For most obsessive psychological disorders, the cure comes from within. Most people with an compulsive lying disorder or any other obsessive compulsive disorder, never admit the fault in their personality, but know that it is there. Fortunately, many people are becoming more and more aware of obsessive disorders and are now pursuing psychiatric treatment to cure it.

The weird part is, you may not even know anything about your person of interest! Do you see that person just a couple times a day? How often have you actually talked to that person? IF the answer to both the questions is 'rarely' or 'maybe once', then the chances of your feeling for that person are love, but an obsession. The human mind is indeed and amusing and confusing thing to behold. You can see someone just once in your life, but that one meeting (direct or indirect) may have such and impact on you, that you just can't stop thinking about that moment and that person. Maybe you were feeling down in the dumps and that just when you thought your life is too miserable to be true, someone comes up and unconsciously lends you a helping hand. This help, no matter how small, like giving you and eraser or helping you clear up a mess you made, makes you think that this person is a really nice person. And if that person is good looking, your emotions grow that much stronger. You'll end up fantasizing about that person and blow his/her personality up so much, you might think they can easily run for President! But the bottom line is, this is just your own thoughts and you need to stop. The worst part about fantasizing is, if and when you do end up with the person, their imperfections will make you think lesser of them to a higher degree, because every action they take will end up shattering your own illusion of that person. That is why, you need a cure and you need it now.

Obsessive Love Cure

Like I said, the cure for such a disorder comes when the person suffering realizes and understands the problem in his psychology and takes the lead in trying to fix it. If you remain in denial of the problem and choose not to take treatment, then obsessive love treatment becomes unnaturally difficult. It's like a person with a flu who refuses to take medication, how can you cure him then? Hence on that note, here are some ways of curing obsessive love.

Learn to Let Go
As easy as it is to say, letting go is no mean feat, especially for an obsessive stalker. But if one realizes the problem and the extent of the problem and wishes to change, then the best thing that he or she can do is forget that person and move on. Remember the adage: out of sigh, out of mind. Stay away from that person you love so obsessively and it will be good for you.

Talk to Yourself
It is essential that you talk to yourself and somehow convince yourself that you are in a bad situation. Move out of the cycle of obsessive thinking and anxiety. You have to understand that fact and talk yourself through. You have to convince yourself that the person that you obsessively love today may not be the right person for you and hence remove that person from your heart and your mind. Use your time to build your confidence and understand that people fall in love with confident people rather than weird stalkers.

Find a Hobby or Special Interest
It is said that when you follow a hobby passionately, you tend to get very involved with it and forget everything and everyone else. The person goes in a kind of trance and hence the hobby or special interest tends to take the primary attention of the obsessive lover, than the obsessively loved one. This concept is known as 'flow'. After all it is better to be obsessed with something you have rather than something which you don't or can't have. Having other interests will also help a person who shows obsessive behavior in relationships, as it will help them stop thinking about their insecurities.

Friends
If there is one social unit which affects the thinking of a person more than anything else, it is the friends that are around him. Its essential that the friends of the troubled person rally around him in this tough time and help him get over his obsessive love. A positive social circle will have a positive impact on the person. His friends have to make sure that the obsessive lover understands that they are with him through this tough time. Friends should help coax the person out from his anxiety and put him on the right path.

Professional Help
And if all else fails, you can register yourself with an psychotherapy organization like the Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, which will help you get over your obsessive love. If you are not comfortable talking about your problem in front of other people, you can visit a psychologist who will suggest some ways to get over your unrequited love.

As you can see, there are several treatments to help you get over your obsessive love and stalking. Always remember that there is nothing more important in the world than yourself. Never let anyone else be the focal point of your life, let YOUR life be about YOU.