Ninja Vs Realtor

I'm a Realtor. I wanted to be a ninja. If you are currently deciding about whether to pursue a career as a Realtor or a ninja I have written a comparison. I have never been a ninja or know any ninjas. But that won't stop me from writing a review. If you were a ninja you could stop me but you're probably not.

Accessories:

Ninja - Ninjas have throwing darts. They have weird bamboo poles they fight with. I even saw a ninja use his hair as a weapon.

Realtor - Realtors have PDAs. If you threw it really hard at someone in the head, it would probably hurt. We also have lots of pens. If you glued all the pens to your body and then hurled yourself at someone, you could impale them.

Ability to walk on walls:

Ninja - Yes

Realtor - No

Job prospects:

Ninja - I don't know who hires ninjas. Usually if you are a ninja someone kills your family and then you spend the rest of your life avenging them or paying off a blood debt. But I don't think anyone pays you. It's usually assumed that when your parents died in the beginning of the movie/your life, they left you a large trust fund.

Realtor - You can generally work in any city. But generally realtors don't make alot of money.

Longevity of Career:

Ninja - You generally are a ninja for life. At some point you probably swear some kind of blood oath vowing something. You might even carry on your ninja oath in the afterlife. I don't know.

Realtor - On average Realtors usually drop out of the profession in 2 or 3 years and move back to being a mid-level manager at Costco or whatever. It seemed like more fun on House hunters.

At a party you are:

Ninja - Hiding out of sight watching your archenemy. You are wearing all black from head to toe even though all the walls are white. You are not seen because your ninja skills overcome the fact that you are color blind.

Realtor - You are wondering why your neighbor's best friend chose a different realtor when they bought a house in the neighborhood. Even though you live in the neighborhood and know it really well and your neighbor said he would recommend you to all his friends when you got all muddy looking for his stupid wedding ring at 2am in the ravine. Dick.

General public knowledge:

Ninja - Everyone respects, yet fears you.

Realtor - No one fears you. Somehow even less people respect you.

Ideal for job:

Ninja - You are generally silent and deadly.

Realtor - You are either an old man or a woman with big breast implants. If you are an old man with breast implants you are the ultimate realtor. Congratulations.

Your favorite TV show:

Ninja - Dynasty

Realtor - Simpsons (If you are asking- shouldn't it be house hunters. No. If you programmed all day, would you want to go home and watch a recording of people sitting in an office programming. No probably not.)

Favorite Color:

Ninja - Blue

Realtor - Purple

Who else is inspired to be a ninja/realtor:

Ninja - Every kid under the age of 5. Although some want to be some kind of ninja astronaut.

Realtor - People at work who are annoyed that their boss gave them the crappy project with the new annoying guy.

Your enemies:

Ninja - Everyone you kill or are about to kill.

Realtor - People that take up all your time and blab and blab and blab about all the investment properties they are going to buy. Then you realize they recently declared bankrupty and are basically full of crap. His name is Frank.

Ki Gray is a realtor in Austin Texas. They run a website called Escapeso Austin Real Estate. When they are not thinking of ninjas they do stuff like program real estate calculators and write descriptions of Austin condos.