Never Land - Chapter Four
Life without Amelia is difficult for Rosy. In this chapter, she finds out just how difficult when her new-found intelligence isn't enough for Rosy and something unexpected happens that takes a toll on Rosy.
Amelia being gone is so unreal. I keep looking at the front door whenever I hear a sound, expecting her to walk into my home hands full of fashion magazine on a Saturday or a nutella sandwich for my breakfast when we’re both running late for school. It seems that Amelia being my friend played a big part in everyone suddenly taking a keen interest in me. Now that she’s gone I miss her and worst of all I have no real friends. The only real friends I had other than her were my friends from my Special ED classes and because I pushed them away they’ve done the same to me.
"Good morning Rosy, said Mrs. Montgomery. I am so pleased to see you again. Now Dr. Brown just wanted me to do a follow-up of your reading and so on and seeing as it has been a couple of months I would like to listen to your reading, what would you like to read for me today?" I thought about it and even though it would probably be easy for me I replied, "I would like to read Peter Pan please if that’s ok Miss." I started to read. What should have been easy for me was difficult. I stumbled over easy words and struggled to understand simple passages from the book I had read so many times. "Uhm, Rosy this is very peculiar. You had made a vast improvement where your reading is concerned. Is everything ok?" I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I was turning back to the way I used to be. "I'm sorry Miss, I have to go. I am so late for maths class." Saying that I rushed out of the reading room, went to the girls toilets and had a good cry.
"Rosy please come and finish the calculation on the board." I hadn’t been paying much attention in class but I smiled and walked up to the board feeling ready because I loved trigonometry. I lifted my chalk to the board but the words and numbers seemed to be chasing one another and they soon became squiggles. "Are you done yet, Rosy?" "Just a moment miss." I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and then answered the equation.
After school I went home early and lay on my bed too afraid to try my homework or reading. My phone started to ring. I smiled it was Amelia. "Hi Amelia, how's everything? It's really great to hear from you." "Hey Rose! It is so great to hear your voice. Things are ok here too, dad's working hard and oh mum says she's keeping a nutella sandwich for you for when you visit in August! Schools here are ok, most people speak Arabic but some of them are really nice." I didn’t want Amelia to think I was a loser and lost without her so I lied. "Things are great here too. Max asked me out and I said yes. The people from the Special Ed class aren’t talking to me but I don’t care because I have a lot of friends..." "That’s great Rosy... Hey I miss you." "I miss you too", I replied and suddenly I felt bad for not telling her what was going on. "Hey Rosy, I have to go sorry, call you again soon." Before I could tell her about my fears her phone clicked and the line went dead.
I decided not to tell mom about what happened at my reading test, I didn’t want to upset her because she has been so happy lately. Besides I could answer that trigonometry question when I tried right? The next few days at school were a struggle. I was meant to have another session with Mrs. Montgomery but I avoided it, not wanting to know how badly I now read. Someone asked me to tutor them in maths and I had to lie that I was busy. I spent lunches alone in the girl’s toilets in a cubicle crying over my nutella sandwiches wishing the day would end.
One day I was crying in my room on my maths book because I didn’t understand anything in my book or my homework activity and my mom came in. "Oh Rosy whatever is the matter baby?" I buried my face in her sweater and took in the familiar warm scent of her, "I’m sorry mommy, and I think I’m stupid again. I tried so hard." "Shhhh", my mother said in a soothing voice. "I think it is time we pay Dr. Brown a visit..."
"Good morning Rosy, said Mrs. Montgomery. I am so pleased to see you again. Now Dr. Brown just wanted me to do a follow-up of your reading and so on and seeing as it has been a couple of months I would like to listen to your reading, what would you like to read for me today?" I thought about it and even though it would probably be easy for me I replied, "I would like to read Peter Pan please if that’s ok Miss." I started to read. What should have been easy for me was difficult. I stumbled over easy words and struggled to understand simple passages from the book I had read so many times. "Uhm, Rosy this is very peculiar. You had made a vast improvement where your reading is concerned. Is everything ok?" I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I was turning back to the way I used to be. "I'm sorry Miss, I have to go. I am so late for maths class." Saying that I rushed out of the reading room, went to the girls toilets and had a good cry.
"Rosy please come and finish the calculation on the board." I hadn’t been paying much attention in class but I smiled and walked up to the board feeling ready because I loved trigonometry. I lifted my chalk to the board but the words and numbers seemed to be chasing one another and they soon became squiggles. "Are you done yet, Rosy?" "Just a moment miss." I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and then answered the equation.
After school I went home early and lay on my bed too afraid to try my homework or reading. My phone started to ring. I smiled it was Amelia. "Hi Amelia, how's everything? It's really great to hear from you." "Hey Rose! It is so great to hear your voice. Things are ok here too, dad's working hard and oh mum says she's keeping a nutella sandwich for you for when you visit in August! Schools here are ok, most people speak Arabic but some of them are really nice." I didn’t want Amelia to think I was a loser and lost without her so I lied. "Things are great here too. Max asked me out and I said yes. The people from the Special Ed class aren’t talking to me but I don’t care because I have a lot of friends..." "That’s great Rosy... Hey I miss you." "I miss you too", I replied and suddenly I felt bad for not telling her what was going on. "Hey Rosy, I have to go sorry, call you again soon." Before I could tell her about my fears her phone clicked and the line went dead.
I decided not to tell mom about what happened at my reading test, I didn’t want to upset her because she has been so happy lately. Besides I could answer that trigonometry question when I tried right? The next few days at school were a struggle. I was meant to have another session with Mrs. Montgomery but I avoided it, not wanting to know how badly I now read. Someone asked me to tutor them in maths and I had to lie that I was busy. I spent lunches alone in the girl’s toilets in a cubicle crying over my nutella sandwiches wishing the day would end.
One day I was crying in my room on my maths book because I didn’t understand anything in my book or my homework activity and my mom came in. "Oh Rosy whatever is the matter baby?" I buried my face in her sweater and took in the familiar warm scent of her, "I’m sorry mommy, and I think I’m stupid again. I tried so hard." "Shhhh", my mother said in a soothing voice. "I think it is time we pay Dr. Brown a visit..."
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