My Sins

Have you ever loved someone so much you don't want to hurt her but in the end you always end up hurting her being there for her through everything telling her it's going to be okay holding her as she cried on your shoulder with her arms around you in sweet embrace wiping those tears away as you kiss her soft red lips but every time you have to say goodbye it hurts so much it feels like your heart is about to be torn right out of your chest like a meat cleaver hacking at a piece of meat on the kitchen counter in the depths of hell and every time you think that this goodbye is going to be the last you share with her you don't want to leave her side so you linger a little longer trying to show her how much you care for her but in the end it has come to an end all the heartbreak the hurt you cause her you want it to end so you leave her side for the last time only to hurt her even more by doing so and it cuts you so deep you feel like you have slipped even deeper into the depths of hells fire and there lies the desire to go back to her and wrap your arms around her and say you are there for her that it won't happen again but as you let her go you feel so bad that you punch the wall until your blood stains your soul until it doesn't hurt any more because you promised something like that a promise that you don't want to break but in the end you know you will because you know of the sins you have committed in the past will some day be realized and it hurts so much the blood dripping from your fists are filled with sorrow and anger that one day it will happen again your eyes begin to burn and your head begins to pound as these sins start to rise from the ashes and are realized by all but no no one understands but guess what? I do and I have felt like this everyday of my life so all you that think you know what it means to hurt like this know not of what I speak because you haven't known this pain this sorrow this anger but I do