My Life in a Quick Version

I AM 17

Listening to you shout and scream
Throwing and stabbing at him and me
I am only 8
But it is like I'm 100
What is wrong with you?
I don't think I will ever under stand
How could you tell your only son how to kill himself?
I never thought you hated me that much
I use to try to help you

But I soon got tired of trying to get stabbed by you.
I was only 8 when I saw you try to kill your self
Swallowing a bottle of Bayers Aspirin,
And saying you don't care.
When I was growing up
That was normal to me.
What is wrong with you?
I always thought that it was normal
To walk into the bathroom
To see their mom

With her pants below her ankles
Passed out on the toilet
Almost every damn night.
I fucking hate you
You should never have had me
I will never forgive you for what you put me through.
When I was even younger,
When you use to watch me swim
You would pass out on the beach chair

Because you were drinking and popping your pills
And Dad would have to tell me to get out
To help him carry you back up the stairs.
Half way up you would wake up
And start screaming and yelling
Here's your 6-year-old son
Not having a choice but to drop their own mother
So I wouldn't fall
What do you want me to do?
I was only 6.