Miss Hot Topic and Mr. Abercrombie Together?! Chapter 18

"Selena, wait. I don't get it. Just tell me...What the hell's gotten into you?" Connor grabbed my arm gently and pulled me back. We were about arm's length away and way too close. I pulled back and kept on walking, ignoring his hurt expression. We were only two houses away from mine and I was just dying to get away from him.

"Nothing. Nothing at all." I said and apologized to God--in my mind of course--for lying.

"I know I've only known you for..I don't know, short time now but I know something's wrong. I'm not retarded. Well, only a bit but not /that/ retarded." I couldn't help but to smile. But then I remembered last night and what he said and a sigh came out of my mouth before I could stop it.

"Seriously, Selena. What's wrong?" Connor stopped me again but I didn't refuse this time. He looked at me dead in the eyes and I knew that /he/ knew something was way off. I mean I had to tell him some time so it might as well be now.

"I just...it's just that...I..."

"Just spit it out will you? You're acting as if I'm the Boogie Man or something. Am I /that/ ugly right now?" He tried to laugh it off but I could tell he was worried.

I cracked a smile and he smiled even wider. I knew I couldn't just be 'friends' with Connor, knowing that he...loves me. That's just cruel and wrong. And it wouldn't help any of us. So I did what I thought was right.

"IheardyousayIloveyoutomeyesterdayandnowIdon'tknowifwecanbefriendsbecauseIstill
loveyouknowwho." I held my breath, waiting for Connor's reaction.

"Um, English please?" he looked at me with confused eyes and dragged me to the sidewalk. We both sat down and I looked down at my shoes, avoiding eye contact.

"I heard what you said to me yesterday. And...and...I just don't think it's 'okay' if we stay friends. I'm...I still love him. And I really don't want to hurt you. I love you and all but it's just different with--" He cut me off with a hug. A freaking hug. I knew this kid was messed up (just like me) but I didn't know he was this screwed in the head.

"I don't care. And yeah I kind of figured that out after the first day here. It's just..I don't know. Maybe you're not the right one for me but who knows? Maybe you'll move on. You have to move on SOME TIME. I just..I just think that we could work. We can /make it/ work." When I looked into Connor's eyes, I could tell he actually meant what he just said. He wasn't just trying to f.ck with my heart or just plain f.ck with me. He actually loved me. And I...I didn't know what to do or say.

"I...I have to go, Connor." I got up quickly and ran into my house. I ignored my parents and went straight to my room. I hopped on my bed, feeling like...a sh.tbucket.
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I'm so sorry that it's so short.
I just don't have enough time to write right now!
Really sorry. hopefully it gets better. Sorry, guys.