Mind in Agony

I lay here its midnight,
My heads going around and around,
I think about my past, not happy with my now,
Flashback arrives, my mind starts to hurt,
The screaming gets louder.... I wish I was dead,
Thoughts racing, these feelings I don't quite understand,

Lost inside a confused mind,
Not sure on who I am .., I cant breath now,
I feel myself panic, my pillow is wet, well isn't this tragic,
No one understands, they want the girl they once knew, so sure about herself, now they ask What happened to YOU ?..,,
I feel so helpless and small, and at times lost and vulnerable, can't bare to see my reflection in the mirror,

Self esteem, ' disabled",,
Its still midnight... I hear the clock tic away my life, I wonder about tomorrow, how will I ever survive?,
People look at me strangely cuz they don't understand, but how can I expect them to, when I Don't even understand, ..
I know I should be sleeping but my mind is in so much pain, this agony is so bad, and its Driving me INSANE!,,,