Living with an Alcoholic Spouse

Are you staying with an alcoholic partner/spouse? Or is it someone you know? Either ways, it is a difficult life to live. Anyone who has seen even bits and pieces of this kind of a life in the 3rd person, would know at least 10% of how bad it really is. There are many factors to consider if you try to make the situation any better than it already is.

If you are living/dealing with an alcoholic spouse, the best thing you can do for them would be to release them from the habit. Here is some help.

Problem, but not yours
It is important for you to remember that alcoholism is a problem. But, the issue here is that many people who live with an alcoholic partner, tend to make it their problem in the process of coping with an alcoholic spouse or partner. The key is to keep your sanity intact. You need to remember at all points of time, that the alcoholism is THEIR problem and NOT yours. Do not get emotional about the situation. You need to keep your composure and calm. Treat them the way you normally would have. Do not pamper them, but refrain from nagging them either.

Disablement
Do you know that often spouses and partners, actually, enable their counterparts to stay addicted to alcohol? You will buy them the drinks, go to bars with them "occasionally" and call in sick for them at work or a family event when they have a terrible hangover (which they do, all the time!). When dealing with an alcoholic spouse, stop doing this for them. Tell them that they can drink all they want as long as your life and their responsibilities are unaffected by it. They may try to manage it, but sooner than later, they will realize that they need to tune down the booze. This is their first step into alcohol rehab. Join a forum to get more help and empathy, along with some much-needed guidance.

Say No to Self Pity
It is understandable when people pity themselves for the way their alcoholic spouse behaves. But let me tell you something; self pity is the worst thing you can do for yourself. Stop telling yourself that you have it worse, and "why is this happening?". Carry on with your life. You sticking around to clean up after your spouse is not going to help them. When dealing with an alcoholic partner, you need to show them that you still have a life. Besides, when they get abusive, coping with him/her can get difficult. The best thing to come to your rescue would be your social commitments. Don't miss work, and make sure your life is on track. If you are really working at helping your spouse, this is the way to go.

Love is Intoxicating too
There is often a reason behind a person having to resort to alcoholism. To detach them from the vice, you need to help them out with that reason. The love, unconditional and irrevocable love, of a spouse or a partner can really help a person to kick the habit. However, don't solve their issues for them. In fact, avoid interaction with them while they are drinking. But when they are sober, be the same loving partner you were before the habit came into the picture (even more loving, if possible). Do not get into arguments or fights with them when they are under the influence. This will help you keep yourself away from the derivative of the influence, as well. You can also try out some alcohol detox for them.

When you stay with an alcoholic spouse, one needs to be sure about every move. Coping with a spouse who drinks excessively is no piece of cake. Make sure you maintain your sanity. Keep your calm when dealing with their antics. Treat them with love, and get professional help to pull you and your loved one out of the mess. This is where I sign off! All the best!