Like The Stars Colliding: Chapter 1: Five O'Clock Shadow

Picture is of Leia
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn't need a test to know the end results.....

I snuggled underneath my old comforter breathing in and out heavily. Mama hadn't changed my room at all; it was just as how I had left it when I went off to college. My Winnie the Pooh Teddy bear sat in the same spot in my desk chair. I smiled as memories of me holding the bear and talking to it as if it were a person came to mind. Daddy had given it to me back when he had the time for us; all he did was work...and work....and work...

An old familiar scent of tropical flowers delicately caressed my nose as I shifted the comforter tighter around my body. It was freshly washed with mama's favorite detergent and so were the sheets I laid on.

As the last hour of the day dragged on the air became stifling even as the sunset and the night took its form. I kicked away the comforter and curled up into a fetal position. The last bit of light from the sun moved over my face and slowly lined the walls of my bedroom. I held my hand up and marveled at the light crisscrossing along my hand and fingers.

What was I doing home? I was like a child clinging to her mother for the silliest of reasons. I shouldn't have moved back...but nonetheless there I was lying in my old bed.

22 years old and back at home....

What was I going to do with an English degree?

Go back to school...graduate school...become an editor...journalist...something.

I barely had a job at the bookstore, barely because it was hard to get in the first place.

A familiar shiver shot through my body and I allowed myself to go back to my freshman summer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Freshman summer (Three Years Earlier)

Amelia raised both arms up high in the air and threw her head back, "Leiaaaaaaaaaa!" Her raven black curls bounced in the light breeze of the afternoon and the sun bronzed her perpetually pale skin. My best friend had thrown her skirt to the side and now stood with her small feet dug into the hot sand. She raised her head up and twirled around in her bikini with a devious smile I had always associated with trouble. I pushed away my own brown curls from my face and stood in my one spot. I was determined not to put up with her deviousness today.

"Come on! I promise, I won't force you into anything....today."

I crossed my arms over my body in an attempt to hide my bareness. Bikini's weren't meant for me....I never seemed to feel right walking around feeling naked. I blamed Amy for that, she had done an awesome job of stealing my over cover and jean shorts as soon as I turned my back. I glared at her instinctively cursing myself for letting her drag me out to the beach....when I could've been home sleeping.

I thought of the many ways to disappear.....

But that was foolish I had no way to get home, Amy had driven us to the beach.

My eyes scanned over my surroundings .....other black girls, white girls, Hispanics, you name it as long as they were under the age of thirty they were there enjoying their summer. Then there were the men and the boys and the boys trying to be men and the occasional fortyish man trying to scam on college girls.

Disgusting.

Amelia waved her arms in the air again, "Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I want you to meet someone seester."

Years ago if I hadn't known her I would've gotten her told for calling me sister. I would've said 'Is it because I'm black? Why I gotta be a sister? Huh? Huh?' But I knew that as of now she meant it as a term of endearment. Sisters and best friends was maybe a lil strong for someone I had only known a year....but being roommates does that to two people.

As I made my way over to her she left her spot and began walking to a group of majority white men behind her. I chewed on my bottom lip at the thought of what she was cooking up inside her mind. How many times had she tried to hook me up with a guy....only to fail because I was too shy.

Ok....I wasn't necessarily shy....just when it came to men I didn't know. I had to warm up to them and then everything was fine after.

With each step I increasingly became aware (again) of my bareness. I wasn't fat and for that matter I barely had enough fat for my growing curves, I was skinny except for my hips and breasts just starting to grow. It was like going through puberty a second time....the first one hadn't been enough for me.

"Leia come here." Amelia turned around half way and in doing so summoned the looks of the beach going men with her petite voluptuous curves.

I picked up the pace and found my place next to her. It was funny the way I was significantly taller than her, yet she commanded so much attention......ok I wasn't THAT much taller than her....just by two inches....but it mattered to me.

"Hey everyone...hey yeah you...ha-ha and you this is my bestie Leia...and Leia these are the guys."

The guys, I smiled and as I muttered "Hey wazzup?" with a small wave at all of them I crossed my ankles. I wondered what all five of them saw....maybe a shy light-skinned girl with bushy curls wet from the beach water.....a docile nineteen year old girl.....doe like.

"Hey." The taller one of the group spoke, he must've been at least 6 feet tall with black shiny curls that stopped at the nape of his neck. The one with the pretty green guys and bare sculpted chest.

The others followed in speaking. One was short and dark-skinned with wavy hair and hazel eyes, I mentally winked at him. Then there was a blonde tallish chubbyish guy with freckles and sunburned skin. The other two appeared to be the knockoffs of the original thing - the first guy.

"This is Gavin (black guy), Ryan (blond), Michael, Garrett (the two knockoffs) and Sammie (original)." Amy carried on.

I nodded and let my eyes scan over Golden boy....he was hot.....definitely. My attraction to him wasn't any different from my previous attractions....those soon faded when it became obvious I wouldn't give up. It was different because he wasn't black and although I had been attracted to non-black guys before (a lot a lot) this time It was different. His smile made my face a little bit hotter, made the butterfly wings beat against my stomach a little bit harder and my heart pound a little faster.

As I ogled at him his eyes averted from the guys and Amy to me. The corners of his thin pinkish lips lifted up into a smirk and he winked knowingly at me. My cheeks' reddened and I dropped my eyes to stare down at my freshly painted sky blue toenails.

"Hey....c'mon guys let's play some v-ball."A voice I recognized as Sammie say.

"Dude why? How about we go over there and talk to the blondes instead."

"Or we could play volley ball and talk to chicks at the same time."

"Dumbass."

I raised my head to watch all five of the guys pushing and shoving each other as they made their way to the volley ball net. The sun haloed around each one, bare torsos glistening in the sun, strong calves carrying strongly built men and the sound of macho laughter heavy in the air.

"What do you think?"

"Think of what?" I had my eyes on Sammie rolling in the dirt with Garrett and forcing him into an arm lock. Michael jumped into the mix pouncing on all three, then within a moment all three were back up and headed to the volley ball net.

"My cousins!!!!"

Cousins?

"Oh your cousins. That's not surprising."

...I lied it was. All they had in common was the same raven black hair, the three guys looked the same but Amy looked pasty next to all of them and shorter....and the fact that if they were related to her then they were Italian as well.

Sam took his place next to a petite girl with flowing blond curls in a tankini. He turned his head and spoke to her reaching over to playfully tap her on the shoulder. She laughed and pushed him back softly. The sound of her laughter lingering in the air like haunting music....She moved closer and whispered something in his ear, Sam leaned back with a look I could only identify as embarrassment and laughed. Their laughter was cut short when a tall dark Hispanic tossed Sam the ball. I saw the muscles in his back tense up as he held the ball and then with a tightly balled fist he stroked the ball.

"Leia come on. The girls are waiting."

By girls she meant her girls, they were faker (that's what it seemed) plastic (well guess that means fake) and silently mean....

"Uh you go ahead I'll meet you over there later. I'm gonna hang out by the water."

"You sure?" She was already walking backwards when she asked.

"Yeah I am. Go go."

I watched her half run to her girls and made my way to the waterfront. I pressed my toes into the wet sand and traced my initials in it. L first and then C. I walked slowly, the water covering my feet centimeters and then inches at a time. My breath caught in my throat as the water passed over my exposed skin. I loved the feeling of water on me....it was soothing.

Breath, breathe....

Go in deeper, more, more.

Pretty soon I was so far in the water was up to my chin with my feet barely touching the sand bed.

"Leia!!! What are you doing out there?!" Sam shrieked.

My eyes snapped opened, I hadn't realized they were closed. I tipped my head back and waved my arms in the water on either side of me. My hair fanned out in the water like a Chinese fan.

"She can't swim!!! Sammie go get her!!!"

I closed my eyes and smirked at Amy's melodrama. True I didn't know how to swim, but I wasn't drowning.....I was floating.

"Hey SAM AMY! MY NAME IS SAM!"

I bent my head underneath the water and brought my knees up. I opened my eyes at marveled at the blueness of the water and how beautiful it was to be in the most abundant element on Earth....water.

"Leia, where are you!?"

I would have to go back up sooner or later, my oxygen was giving way and my chest was tightening. I didn't have to go back up surface by myself. I could feel something disturb the water, I could feel the force and it pushed me slightly, then an arm wrapped around my waist, then another. Within seconds my head broke the surface of the water and I gasped for air as someone dragged me to dry land.

"I'm *cough* fine *cough* I knew what I was *cough cough* doing."

I blinked and felt my back touch the hot sand. Sammie hovered over me his arms on either side of my body. He lifted my head up as I coughed and held my back with the other hand.

"You ok?"

His five o clock shadow was very alluring and the way his lips parted as they mouthed words I no longer listened to had me enticed.

"Yeah....great."

I pulled myself out of his hold and sat up on my own, "I wasn't drowned you know?"

He cocked an eyebrow, "Are you sure? Looked that way to me.....besides Amelia said you couldn't swim."

"And why would she tell you that?" I hissed.

"She tells her brother everything."

I rolled my eyes and snorted, "I doubt it." He didn't want to know what she spent her nights doing.

Wait....brother.

"Wait brother?"

Weird how I blurt out my thoughts

He transitioned from a squat to Indian style next to me.

"Yeah brother....older brother....by a year."

Oh....that makes a lot of sense.

"So you're the protective brother she's always talking about? The stiff nerdy poet."

He nodded, "Yep that's me."

"You don't seem so stiff and nerdy to me."

"Thank you...and you're not so safe as she told me.....considering you almost drowned yourself."

I shrugged, "Honestly I was just enjoying the water....but thank you."

"You're welcome....and nice name by the way."

I stretched my legs out and brought my knees up to my chest, "Thanks."

"What can I call you.....since you don't like Sammie."

I looked from the water to his pretty green eyes and drowned in them immediately. There was something in those eyes that I wanted, a li'l bit of soul crying out for another.

I wanna drown in those eyes...thank God for creating them and kiss the lids that closes over those eyes

"Ha-ha Sam. Just Sam. Can I call you Princess Leia?"

A smile spread over my face, I could feel the warmth of it taking over.

"You have to work your way up to that."

"Princess Leia it is." He smirked.