Life Choices - Facing Difficult Decisions

We have all been at a point in our lives where we have to make a difficult decision, and we just don't know how. We spend countless hours thinking about it, contemplating all the options, and trying to sort out all the complex emotions that go along with the decision. We make pro and con lists, go for long walks, or write down our feelings until we come to a place where we can be comfortable with the decision that we have made. The question is, how can you be sure that it is the right decision, and how can you possibly understand the outcome of something that is as unpredictable as life itself?

The truth is, there is no right or wrong way to make a decision, and despite your attempt to predict the outcome, there are so many variables in life that it is nearly impossible to know where your path will take you. The only thing you can do is make the best decision you know how to make at the time that you make it. It sounds simple, but making a decision can be a difficult process, especially if you are dealing with a situation that is very emotional. So what can make this period of time easier? Time and patience.

I think that one of the most difficult things to have is patience with ourselves. We want to believe that we are in control, that we have all the answers and that we are strong, but when we are overrun with stress we can sometimes feel weak, which can be a very difficult emotion for many people. If you're going to get through this though, you need to be patient and allow yourself to go through the very important process of understanding both the impact of the decision, and the potential outcome. You need time to understand it to its fullest, and to come to a point where you can feel confident that the choice you are making is the right one.

So besides time and patience, what can help you get through this? There is no one way to handle the stress of making a big decision, but there may be ways to ease the tension that you feel. Exercise not only releases physical tension, but emotional tension as well. When I faced with stress of any kind, I go to the gym, take a yoga class, or go for a brisk walk. It does more than make me feel better physically, it also gives me time that is just for me - with no one else around - to tackle even a small portion of the array of thoughts running through my head. It's true that I may not be able to tackle the entire problem in that 30-minute workout, but I am usually able to understand at least a portion of the problem a little bit better. I think that this is the key. Don't try to tackle the entire decision all at once. Pick away at it little by little until you have finally picked through all aspects of the stress and emotions that come with making a big decision. Eventually you will gain a better understanding of the situation as a whole, and you will be able to make a decision with a clearer mind.

If exercise isn't good therapy for you, try something else that you enjoy, like reading, writing, drawing, crafts, or even shopping. Whatever it takes for you to have a free moment to yourself to tackle the decision placed in front of you is what you need to do in order to get through it. In fact, you owe it to yourself to give yourself the time to work it out in your mind. You will probably be more satisfied with your decision if you feel as though you understand it completely.

How long will it take? This process is different for everyone, so it is impossible to estimate a time frame. In fact, my suggestion is to eliminate the timeline from the equation completely, because it is unfair and unrealistic to give yourself a deadline when you are working through something big, something that will affect the rest of your life. So take as much time as you need and you will probably feel more confident with the decision in the long run.

Making tough decisions is not always easy. The correct path that we should take is not always clearly laid out before us. Sometimes we need to take a moment to stop, pause, and reflect on something before we can move forward, and there is nothing wrong with that. There is an end in sight, and if you understand that you are not alone with this decision, that millions of people have been faced with difficult decisions throughout their lives, you may realize that you have the support you need to move forward. Patience is probably the most difficult part of this process, but it is the key to making a good decision that is healthy and well thought out. Don't give up, and you will find the strength within yourself to make a decision that you will be happy with for the rest of your life.