Ketchup Popsicle - 16

"Dad! Why in the world would you tell Bobby Neason that I was dead?" Sandra was doing a sort of quiet scream into the phone. She had put Daniel down for his mid-day nap when she got home from meeting with Mr. Neason.
There was silence for a moment on the other end, "I…uh…you were a wreck when he moved away. I didn’t want to see that happen to you again. His father seemed to move around a lot….I’m sorry."

"You’re sorry?" Sandra was beginning to hyperventilate. Her father had been cold and emotionally absent since her mother’s death and she learned to live with that when she was growing up, but this was the absolute limit. "You have no idea what you’ve done. Do you? I probably would have married him, Dad. I would have married him because that was the way it would have gone. And I wouldn’t be stuck here in this prison with no husband and a baby and no future. Thanks Dad, that was REALLY helpful!" she slammed down the phone and fell to her knees sobbing. "I hate my life," she whispered to herself.

Once she was finished with her pity party, Sandra decided that it was time to sort things out in her life. Starting with Mike. To figure out if Mike loved her or not, or wanted to love her, she decided to she would watch him more closely and look for signs. If it was a ‘loves me not’ situation, she would save her money from her new job and move out with Daniel and start a new life just for them. As for Bobby, she couldn’t even bring herself to think about him. She was terrified about seeing him again. The worst part is that she had no idea if and when she would see him again. Did he work for his father or did he live in another country? She hadn’t asked and she had to wait until the following Monday to find out.

She didn’t know what kind of signs she was looking for from Mike. Something that would tell her not to leave him. Something that would tell her that he really did care about her. Letting her live there wasn’t enough, he was doing that out of obligation not choice.

She had resorted to ignoring Mike most of the time over the last year out of resentment for his freedom to go anywhere and do anything at any time of the day while she was stuck at home. The only time she did get out was with his mother. She had become frigid and tried to defrost herself to see if that would make a difference with Mike.

"Would you like to take a walk with us after dinner tonight?" Sandra asked as they sat eating dinner at the little table in the kitchen. She made pork chops in cream of mushroom soup. It was something her mother used to make and eat bite brought with it a warm peaceful feeling along with a heartbreaking longing for her mother.

"Walk!" Daniel repeated throwing a pea at Mike for emphasis. Sandra giggled and looked to Mike for his reaction. Mike was smiling too.

"Sure." Mike said.

Sandra almost fell off her chair in shock. "No gym tonight?" she asked.

"Guess not." Mike replied a little grumpily and Sandra decided to drop it and not push her luck.

Daniel climbed into his red stroller and they all headed out of the driveway for the first time together as a family. It was an odd feeling having Mike along. Sandra was so used to walking alone and chatting with Daniel, pointing things out and stopping every few minutes to put him back into the wagon. It was even odder to be pulling the empty stroller when Mike gave up on Daniel staying put in the wagon and walked with him in his arms.

Daniel was thrilled to be up so high and have a different view of their neighbourhood. "Dada! Dada! Dada!" he kept saying in between squeals of joy. Sandra had to take deep breaths of the fresh spring air to stop herself from crying with happiness for her son. It was working. She was letting Mike in. She was scared to death about the prospect but it was benefiting Daniel to the max.

They walked together every night that week after dinner. Mike, however, decided that he could still make it to the gym after their walks and didn’t usually come back until after they were both fast asleep. Baby steps, Sandra told herself.