Jesus Barred From Drinking Coca-Cola

By Mark Hoerrner

He’s the Son of God, the Alpha and the Omega, the Wonderful Counselor, the Great I Am, but apparently, he’s not allowed to consume soft drinks. At least that’s what representatives from Coca-Cola Italia are telling the producers of a new film, "7 Miles from Jerusalem."

The controversy in the movie stems from a scene in which an ad executive, jaded by his work and his industry, makes a pilgrimage to the Holy Land. While there, he meets Jesus who is happily draining a can of Coke. The ad man, seeing the Son of God create possibly the world’s greatest product endorsement, exclaims "My God, what a testimonial!"

You’d think that being tortured, crucified, and dying to absolve the world of sin would win Jesus a little leeway with Coke execs, but the company says that Jesus is bad for their image.

"We are not interested in this kind of product placement," a Coca-Cola Italia spokeswoman told United Press International.

A written statement was issued.

We don't think it's appropriate to use the subject of this film to create publicity for our brands," the company said. "We advised the producer of this in writing, and are very disappointed that our request was not respected."

Producers Graziano Prota and Angelo Sconda were taken aback by Coke’s attitude toward the film. Immediately, the issue was tossed to the attorneys, and the film company—despite protests that cutting the scene would force cost overruns—began filming new scenes this week in order to have the movie ready for an end of April release. The company had hoped to take advantage of Easter and have the film released on April 6, the Good Friday celebration, but Coke was determined to block the film as long as it contained the Coke scene.

Curiously, the film recently won accolades at the Busto Arsizio film festival in Italy. The judging panel was headed by Krystov Zanussi, a Polish impresario who is rumored to be tight with the Vatican. He found no objectionable material in the film.

The cast of the film includes two Italian luminaries, Luca Ward, a popular soap opera star and Rosalinda Celentano, who starred as Satan in Mel Gibson’s "The Passion of the Christ."