It's Okay To Be Gay

I read recently that the US House of Representatives have approved a bill, granting broad protections against discrimination in the workplace for gay men, lesbians and bisexuals. Some have praised it as the most important civil rights legislation since the Americans with Disabilities Act of 1990. Personally, I am not convinced that it is a fair comparison. People with disabilities do not choose to be who they are; and it is patently unjust to discriminate against them. Gays and lesbians, on the other hand, are becoming increasingly open about their choice of lifestyles – and I do not believe that is uniformly a good thing.

Gays have been around for thousands of years, of course: the most famous historical figure being Alexander the Great. More recently, Oscar Wilde was one of the few who dared to come out of the closet. But they rarely displayed their sexual orientation as openly and proudly as they do now. The predominant feeling was one of shame. Part of the reason could be religious. All the world’s major religions have always regarded homosexuality as an unnatural state – one of the temptations a good man is expected to struggle against. The West is highly critical of Islam’s strict intolerance of homosexuality, but they forget that their Christian Bible has strictures against it too. Moreover, if one believes in the Biblical proclamation to go forth and procreate, it becomes evident that same sex liaisons are not what God had in mind. That is why I have a problem with this new concept of gay marriages. If one subscribes to the view of marriage as a holy communion, how can one expect God to bless a union He considers unnatural?

I an aware that some scientists are trying to prove that homosexuality and lesbianism is in one’s genes and, consequently, beyond one’s control, but I would consider that a cop out. I would submit that, in common with all mammals, primitive urges like rage and uncontrolled sex are inbuilt in all of us. What separates us from the animals is our ability to control them. For thousands of years of years of human history, homosexuality (I am using that term generically to denote all same sex liaisons) was regarded as something to be ashamed of and suppressed: one of the temptations we prayed to Our Father not to lead us into. It has become acceptable only during the last thirty years; a mere blimp in the human experience.

Nowadays, people of either sex do not feel the slightest need to conceal their sexual orientation. They act upon their urges as soon as they discover them – as if it is the most natural thing in the world. There is no introspection, no feeling of right and wrong. It is enjoyable, so it must be all right. It is a natural urge, so why try to suppress it? Many of our natural urges – like sex, whenever the inclination strikes one - are, in fact, kept in check by social and religious strictures. Yes, illicit sexual liaisons have become less furtive and more frequent in recent times, but the strictures still play an effective role in preventing society from degenerating into a bacchanalian love fest. Gay sex, however, has suddenly burst out of the closet with a ferocity and abandon rarely witnessed in human history. It is not only acceptable to be gay, it is to be celebrated. (Gay "married" couples are being featured on the front page of national newspapers- for pete’s sake). It deserves all the rights and privileges accorded to other socially accepted unions. Those who oppose same sex unions are labeled as prejudiced, or bigots, or (shudder) Bush-lovers.

Even if one was to accept that homosexuals have got a raw deal through the millennia, is the pendulum swinging too far to the other side? Take this issue of gays in the military; and the policy of ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’. Can one honestly say that the presence of gay men in a platoon would not be a source of friction? Their officers may not ask, but the men would come to know soon enough. I’m not sure how things would develop in a life and death situation. And what about legalization of gay marriages? It took centuries of social change for women to even get the vote. And now – in the space of a few years - the gays expect, almost demand, that their legal union be blessed by the state; and by society.

I cannot help wondering if there is a certain amount of hypocrisy involved here, even among the ‘liberals’ who proclaim that gays are as ‘equal’ as any other segment of society. If one or more of their children declared that they are gay, the ‘liberal’ parents may accept it – even with good grace – but can they place their hands on their hearts and declare that they would be overjoyed at the revelation? Would a father beam with pride when his son told him he had a male lover? It is time to get real, folks.

In conclusion, then, I would submit that the coming out of homosexuals is a momentous social change. Leaving aside the merits or otherwise, it needs time to be assimilated by society as a whole. The gays have already come a long way in a remarkably short time. It would not be wise to push their luck.