How to Get Back Together After a Break Up

"Break-up"...the word itself sends shivers down my spine. If you have been in a deep relationship ever, and it did not last, you will understand why. Being in a relationship, with all its ups and down, all the happy moments and sad ones, crazy ones and not so crazy ones, can make one feel really connected to the other person at all levels. So, if such relationships come to an end, it seems the end of the world, literally. If you too have been through a break up, but still love your ex, then here are some useful tips for getting back together after a break up.

Analyze the Situation
The first thing to do when dealing with a break-up, is to try to understand why it happened in the first place. Try to ascertain the reasons including where you went wrong. Also, you have to be very clear about whether you really want to get back together with him or her? Try to find out the reasons, why you want your relationship back. If it is loneliness, then I suggest, you start thinking otherwise. Try to socialize and mingle with your buddies. If still you feel that you miss your ex, then work on the wrongs that you might have consciously or unconsciously done, which led to the breakup. Give up all your bad habits, especially the ones which irritated your ex.

Improve Yourself
Break-up is the time when you should work on your strengths and try to improve in every sphere of life - be it personal or professional. Everybody likes to be in the company of full of life and successful people and that includes your ex.

Discontinue Contact
If the breakup is still fresh, I suggest that you discontinue all contacts with your ex for a while. Give time to yourself as well as your ex to heal, and to think about why the breakup happened. Also, when the breakup is new, there is a possibility that your partner does not even feel like looking at you cause he or she might be hurt. So, take a break from each other for about two to three weeks. It could happen that during this break, your partner misses you the same way that you do so it will be easier to get back together after such a break. If you want to get back together with your ex girlfriend, make sure that you wish her on special occasions such as her birthday or wish her luck for some new assignment that she might be taking up at College or office. Remember every small detail of her life however inconsequential you may think it is. Women like it when people fuss about them and she will really appreciate your concern.

Maintain Communication
After some time has passed, maintain communication . Just call him or her casually and ask how they are doing after the breakup. Show that you care for them, even though you have broken up. E mail or call up your ex from time to time, but do not tell them straight away that you want to be together again and how much you are missing them.

Date as "Friends"
A few weeks after you have maintained communication with them, when you feel that you have become friendly again, ask your ex for a casual date, like going for a movie or going out to see a soccer match. Suggest something that he or she likes, and also mention that it is just a date between two people who are friends and who also happen to care a great deal about each other. If they accept going out with you, there are chances that you two can get back together, however, if your partner's answer is no, I think you should make some other plans vis-a-vis your love life is concerned.

Have Fun Together
On your date, have as much fun as you can. Do not talk anything serious such as getting back together or how much you miss him or that you are looking for a committed relationship. Do not mention anything even remotely related to relationships as most men have commitment phobias and thus, such a talk might scare them away. Also, dress up for the date. Wear a dress which was your partner's favorite or which he may have gifted you. Share jokes, pull his legs, be flirtatious, basically just show him how much fun you are to be with.

Suggesting "Being a Couple"
Once you are friends again, and are almost talking to each other on the phone everyday, e-mailing regularly and meeting once a week, ask your ex out on a romantic date. If you are a woman, wait for the man to ask you out, because if he wants to be in a relationship with you again, he will take the initiative. Men, you will have to take the step yourself and ask the lady out. If your ex has again started feeling the same way about you, she will surely accept going out on a romantic date with you.

Being strong, realistic and analyzing the situation well, are very important when dealing with a break up. If your ex has already started dating other people, and does not hide this fact from you either, by mentioning about her love life to you, then I think it should be a wake up call to you. Look for such signals, and do not be over ridden by emotions. You can not force anybody to get back with you, however with certain tact and the above mentioned tips, you can surely convince them.