How to Deal with a Narcissistic Mother

We all know how important the role of parents is in shaping the lives of their children. Among the parents, a mother is more close and important for a child and contributes greatly in his/her personality development. Though not very common, there are children who have to deal with narcissistic mothers and the going can really be tough if they are not advised or counseled properly to deal with such difficult situations. To get your facts right, narcissism is a serious personality disorder in which a person gives more importance to his personal interests and well-being rather than the interests of others. A narcissistic mother could be totally insensitive to her child's feelings and fail to understand his needs. The characteristics of a narcissistic mother given below will help you know things better.

Characteristics of a Narcissistic Mother

The following are the key characteristics of a narcissistic mother:

• Narcissistic mother can be verbally and physically abusive without considering the state of mind of her child
• She may criticize or insult the child in public by giving no importance to his/her achievements
• She may not lose any opportunity to find mistakes in the child's behavior
• She may constantly compare the child with someone else and tell the child how inferior he or she is at various things
• She won't guide the child whole-heatedly, even when she knows that the child needs her the most

By referring to the following steps on how to deal with a narcissistic mother, a child and other family members will find it easy to deal with the problem.

Dealing with a Narcissistic Mother

Understand Her
Even though you feel that your mother is insensitive towards you, there might be some reasons why she would be behaving in that manner. So, as a mature child, you should not over react immediately and try to know the reasons for her behavior. Whenever you get the opportunity, you need to interact with her and make her aware of her duties in a polite way. The chances are that one day, you will see a change in her approach and you will get the love and attention which you have always craved for.

Socialize
You can share your feelings and thoughts with some close friends and relatives and ease your tension. A person having a narcissistic mother might have very low confidence, self-esteem and can feel depressed. If this situation does not change, then there is a possibility that he might feel that he lacks skills and abilities to achieve success in life. It may happen that he neglects his strengths completely and keeps cursing himself for his weak points. These things can be dealt by socializing with the people whom you like and admire.

Psychotherapy
Psychotherapy can be another option to deal with a narcissistic mother. Taking treatment and help from a reputed psychotherapist can help you solve most of your problems. The therapist will first let you talk and understand what you are going through in your life. He will understand your feelings, expectations, your preferences and opinions thoroughly and then recommend some measures with which you can fulfill your wishes. It takes some time for the therapy to show results and hence, having patience and continuing with the sessions will benefit you in the long run.

Move Away
Yeah, this is indeed a very tough call. Moving away from a mother is never easy, no one actually wants to do it. However, experts might suggest to move out from her home, (if you can live independently and take care of yourself) at least for some time till things get in place. This will give her more freedom and personal space as she might have been extremely tired after bringing you up for so many years. For you, it would be difficult to stay alone initially, but later on you will manage it better. Also, this separation is for changing her attitude towards her and not for any sort of revenge. So, when she calls for you, make it a point not to be rebellious or verbally abusive, and visit her promptly.

From the above content, you must have understood that dealing with narcissistic mothers is extremely difficult. However, you should remember that nothing is impossible in the world and with concentrated and dedicated efforts, you will see yourself having cordial relations with her again. Good luck and take care!