Good Work Excuses

Feigning illnesses or personal emergencies, to take an off from work, is an art. Although, all of us have lied at some point or the other, in our professional lives, to take leave from work, but how far have we been successful in convincing the boss that there is a genuine reason behind our absenteeism, depends a lot on the kind of excuses given and also on the way they are delivered. So if you are planning to take a day off and are looking for some really good work excuses, given below are a few chosen ones for you.

Excuses For Not Going to Work

• Tell your boss that you have a cold. And to make it sound convincing, wake up late in the morning you plan to take an off from work and call your boss immediately after waking up. Your morning hoarse voice will be more than enough to convince him that you actually have a cold.
• Migraine... again sounds very convincing. Actually it is one of the best reasons to skip work every Friday. Tell your boss that you get migraines in the form of "cluster headaches" i.e. they occur at regular intervals. This will help you to take an off every Friday and you can enjoy an extended three day weekend.
• A close relative has died. I know it sounds very selfish and thoughtless to use your dead relatives for getting a holiday. In fact, people who do so are mean, base, obnoxious and sans any emotions. They should put themselves in somebody else's shoes and think how would they feel if somebody said that they have died. But to think of it, if you are trying to get over your previous night's hangover or are planning to spend the day with a gal, instead of going to work, sweet old and dead great grandpa's brother's sister's husband should not mind. Right?
• Bank work...the ultimate excuse of all excuses. "I took a loan but was not able to pay the installments because of the still unrevised, 1950 salary structure that prevails in your organization". On a second thought, just say that you have to go to the bank to settle some last minute issues regarding the loan that you are taking and that the meeting cannot be postponed as you really need the loan right away.
• Food poisoning is another good excuse. Seafood...! You are allergic to seafood and you ate it the previous night. Now, you have vomiting, diarrhea, nausea, loose motions... I am sure your boss would not want to hear more.
• If you want to entertain your boss with your funny work excuses, then here goes... my neighbor's house got burnt and I am busy dowsing the fire lest it burns down my villa too. Or, you can say that the water bed in your room burst and you are standing in knee deep water.
• For women, one of the most genuine sounding excuses for not going to work is "I have female problems", especially if it's a male boss as he would not ask for further details.
• "Eye problems" make for convincing reasons to get out of work, if most of your work is limited to computers. You can say that you have a muscle disorder which makes your eye muscles weak and causes tearing and redness and blurring vision and makes you unable to look directly at the computer screen. Or scare your boss with something like "I have a contagious eye infection.. I can work in this condition, it's just that I am worried about you guys". You will get an off, definitely.
• You slipped while taking a shower in the morning. To make it sound genuine, you can describe the scene as "I soaped my face, my eyes were closed and suddenly, soap flew out of my hand onto the floor. I bend down to pick it up and suddenly I too flew and fell on the floor. My ankle twisted, my back strained, I bit my lips and worse, soap entered my eyes."

If you want to come up with good work excuses, make sure they are decent ones. Also, never ask your mother, father, or sister to call up on your behalf. Always, call up yourself. Now, if you will excuse me, my neighbor just called that my cat jumped from my flat's balcony to hers, so I have to go leash my cat.