Giving Up a Child for Adoption: Five Tips

You’re pregnant and don’t know what to do. What should you do and how should you intelligently consider if placing your child for adoption is right for you. Placing a child can be a great blessing to your unborn child and a great blessing to the family who is able to adopt the child, and in most cases a great blessing for you. This article will provide five important steps you should consider in the decision and placement process.

1. Who do I ask for advice? Adoption advice is everywhere: On the internet, from friends, from family, from mental health centers, from County health centers, social services, pregnancy crisis centers, social services and from adoption agencies. It’s important to get advice from a neutral caring source. With statistics showing that the abortion rates in the US are dropping, more women are choosing to place their child in a loving caring home. Most families in the US have had experience with a family member, friend or acquaintance who has adopted a child and a good number of those experiences are positive. In addition to the sources above, it would also be a good idea to find someone you trust who has adopted or given up a child for adoption and listen to their story. You can find many of these stories on adoption agency blogs, or internet magazines (ezine) blogs. Read them, make comments, and ask questions. Look carefully at the pros and cons of keeping your child vs. adoption.

2. What do I want for my child? This is the most important question and one I hear over and over. Most parents, even unexpected parents, want the best for their child. They want their child to have the things they didn’t or at least want them placed in an environment where they will have a greater opportunity to enjoy love and caring. An unexpected or unwanted pregnancy is a time to remember the child and what is best for the new child and not entirely what is best for you. Perhaps you don’t have any schooling, are working at a 24/7 type job, don’t have access to child care or a supportive family. Think of your baby, adoption is an alternative.

3. Take care of your health. Pregnancy is a time to make a healthy lifestyle change: stop smoking, don’t do drugs, don’t drink, and eat right. Every one of the health issues above can have a dramatic effect on your child’s health as well as your own. A trip to your doctor or to the health department of your city, county or state will give you important information about what you should and shouldn’t do now that you are pregnant. Some states have programs to help you with your nutrition needs, so you can eat healthier; others provide neo-natal counseling and medical services to keep you and your child healthy.

4. Will I grieve? Yes. Don’t let anyone tell you that giving up a child for adoption is easy. While each person handles this process differently, you may feel a great loss, sadness, and may need some valuable emotional counseling to help you through the process. If you choose to work with a licensed professional adoption agency, they should have counseling services by licensed professionals to help you with your grief and any other feelings you might have. A good counselor can advise you if your depression is temporary or if you may need additional medical treatment. It’s always wise to get counseling after giving your child up for adoption even if you think everything is going well.

5. Adoption agencies, what to look for. If you want to know what adoption is all about, work only with a licensed, professional adoption agency. Talk to several agencies, check out their references, check with the better business bureau and state to see if they have had any complaints against them, understand your options with the agency and understand any contracts you are asked to sign. Adoption agencies can be valuable tools in bringing you together with qualified parents in the adoption process. The agency will work to provide you with the necessary and legal information and helps you need to go through the pregnancy and birth, they will help you understand the legal process and legal ramifications, and allow you to choose a family, and have pre and post adoption counseling.

Be aware of your adoption rights and the challenges you will face in giving up a child for adoption, and may you find just the right adoption agency and couple to bless your child’s life.